Get paid to watch The Daily Show!

"Seems Mr. Lesczynski set up a drive to distribute toy guns to children. Its not completely clear why, but the sheer idiocy of the idea outweighs any need for explanation. Hold on. Dear god. He launched the program in Harlem. The community didnt take it lying down and theres some funny footage of kids stomping on guns, parents screaming and Jim being chased out of the neighborhood." It's "not completely clear why" because the story didn't mention the fact that the Guns For Tots stunt was done to protest the New York City Council's plan to ban all toy guns in the city - even brightly colored water pistols like those given away by Mr. Lesczynski. That strikes me as "sheer idiocy." What's next - banning plastic knives? For some unfathomable reason, Jon Stewart became the patron saint of responsible news reporting during 2004 with his infamous Crossfire appearance. The Daily Show wouldn't let the facts get in the way of a Unabomber joke and that lame, puzzling tombstone punchline. Also, Jim wasn't "chased out of the neighborhood." You inferred that from the bias of the story. I don't know Jim Lesczynski, but I had heard about the Guns For Tots event on an actual news report. I tuned in to The Daily Show hoping to get a laugh or two from jokes based on facts regarding the daily stupidity perpetrated by government and politicians. Instead, the show had to leave out convenient facts in order to belittle a citizen activist trying to make a difference against those in power. Not much Zen there.

May 12th 2005 Welcome to the daily show. My name is Jon Stewart. Tremendous program for you today. The sun is shining. Tracey Ullman is going to be joining us in a little bit its a real tribute to America and to freedom tonight. The two top stories: Jon rubs his nipples as Republican George Voinovich burns UN ambassador nominee John Bolton at the committee vote with painful truths like, It is my opinion that John Bolton is the poster child of what someone in the diplomatic corps should not be. In the end, John votes yes and Mr. Stewart coins the phrase voinoviched: to fake no and vote yes. In the State of Florida Jeb Bush signed a bill that allows Floridians to immediately open fire if they feel threatened. Mr. Bush justified the bill by noting that retreating from life threatening situations defied common sense. Jon retorted with a photoshopped hurricane evacuation route road sign. (Pussy Promenade) Banned Aid: Ed Helms Ed interviews Jim Lesczynski; a Libertarian who started a program called Guns for Tots. With this program, Jim attempts to distribute toy guns to children in Harlem. This is an older segment of Eds, but very entertaining. Jim, who is still in politics actually links to the interview on his website under political hijinks. You can also read more about The Great Cigarette Giveaway. Gay Watch: It was a short segment on Jim West; an anti-gay gay republican, whos outing Jon labeled as perfect irony, noting If you wanna meet gay dudes, start cruising the anti-gay buffet. Jon followed into Wolf Blitzer interviewing a sexy Swedish reporter on pheromone research. It trailed off into a visual gag and a bad axe body spray joke. Guest: Tracey Ullman As she plugged her comedy special on HBO, I worried that shed forgotten to take meds of some kind. Jon barely had to work through the interview as Tracey bumbled on to one thing or another. From sexual flashbacks to birth videos, it was clear that Tracey lives to perform. One charming exchange occurred when Ullman asked how Jons baby was, to which Jon deadpanned Oh God. I should make a call. Moment of Zen Wolf Blitzer questioning the Swedish researcher on gay man, straight man brain types & previous footage used in the Florida story of people at firing ranges. Douche bag count: 2

May 11, 2005. A day that will forever be remembered as "the day a bunch of sirens around Washington DC exploded in their own, siren-y testosterone contest." Oh, and people ran the politician's equivalent of a marathon as the Capitol was evacuated. As the theme from "Chariots of Fire" played metaphorically in the background, only one man could sum it all up: Run, you magnificent bastards. As usual, Jon Stewart and "The Daily Show" did a fine job of taking the "bull" out of "cable news network," moving from the evacuations in Washington to the "forgotten middle child of the Axis of Evil," L'il Kim Jung-Il. From there, it was a night of traditional Daily Show fare: This Week in God, Back in Black, and Great Moments in Punditry (as Read by Children). The always-brilliant This Week in God was slightly lower-key than in past weeks, with Stephen Colbert once again playing the Indian/Indian joke (first seen at the Democratic National Convention), but strengthening it with a takeoff of the iconic anti-littering ads of the 1970s while discussing the Navajo's recent ban on gay marriage. Typical This Week in God fare, but by adding a "Praised or Hazed" sequence to the report, the show's writers proved once again that they've never met a pun that isn't funny when read by Stephen Colbert. Covering everything from strife in South Africa ("kind of hard to tell what God's thinking there," noted Colbert) to the Kentucky Derby, the continual insanity of this segment showed why so many people love it. If God really is everywhere, then He's on assignment for this show, trying to come up with ever-zanier antics. Speaking of antics, Lewis Black showed up for a segment on communism. After a blurb on China's love affair with its lost son Yao Ming (now there's some incest you don't see every day), Kim Jung-Il came back for a second go-round, this one involving a kidnapped South Korean movie director asked to make a film about the breakout star of "Team America." As usual, Black was able to bring it all home to middle America ... with a crack about "House of Wax." But "Back in Black" is especially odd when juxtaposed against "Great Moments in Punditry," "The Daily Show's" only known form of child labor. Again, religion and homosexuality were issues, as common Punditry figure Jerry Falwell opined about whether being gay is a choice. After a commercial break featuring an anti-Chinese Communist Party rant by a Falun Gong lobbying group ("Has Lewis Black come back for more?" I wondered), Al Roker talked with Stewart about a book on fatherhood. The two know each other well enough -- Stewart wrote a story for the book -- that the interview was very comfortable and relaxed. So relaxed, in fact, that Roker was able to get in a serious story that Jimmy Buffet contributed to the book about his father's struggles with Alzheimer's. Only "The Daily Show" could even attempt to combine sacrelige, anti-communist rants, and heartwarming moments between two award-winning journalists in the same episode. While the combination didn't contain any iconic moments, it sure as hell beat the "real" news.

The very best thing about The Daily Show is that its job is to make sure it can humiliate the authority four out of seven days a week. In that, The Daily Show is much like an elephant it never forgets. It begins today (or rather, last night) with a humbling note on behalf of the President: While the whole of Washington ran flailing from anyplace that looked important after reports of a plane flying over the forbidden White House airspace, George W. Bush, commander in chief, literally couldnt be bothered mid-bike ride, perhaps for fear of a repeat of an incident a while back in which George W. Bush allegedly took a tumble from a bicyclea subtle reference which only a bitter Democrat or The Daily Show would remember. Cycling away the show examined another three important topics: 1. A few things can make Jon Stewart rub his nipples in quiet contemplation: John Ashcrofts lyrical skills to name one, and John Boltons potential appointment as UN ambassador (interestingly, both are called John coincidence?). In an appropriately stereotyping set-up for the next segment, Stewart commentated on GOP Senator Voinovichs complete, total, ridiculous, utter and fabulous disapproval of Bolton (who is, according to Stewart, apparently [] a bit of a prick) as a diplomat, and then his committee vote for Yes on Bolton, moving the decision to approve Bolton to the full Senate ( http://abcnews.go.com/Politics/wireStory?id=751883 ). The world has been Voinovichd as the Senate turns from advising consent to [following ellipsis intended to represent mystified pause] consent. 2. Jeb Bush recently signed a bill to allow Florida residents to not only carry guns in public, but to fire when threatened. Wayne LaPierre, executive VP of the NRA, believes the law will sweep across the nation (because every state wants to be just like Florida) because people want to be able to protect themself [sic sic sic] [SIC]. The Daily Show need not do much more than display the stylish Speedo Holster, in which a weapon may be conveniently carried on the person in an unsuitably small bathing suit (the picture of which was not entirely the most horrifying thing Ive ever seen). 3. Gaywatch: Whatever happened to the shows old segment tHERSday? Now we know: Mayor Jim West of Washington has usurped it, attempting to legislate and preaching against gays live 24/7and then of course being outed by a reporter posing as a 17-year-old male on gay.com ( http://www.gay.com/index.html ) . West responded: I dont deny that. Anymore, Stewart adds, prompting a segue to the Swedish Karolinka Institutes study on homosexual response to pheromones ( http://www.tucsoncitizen.com/index.php?page=national&story_id=051005a1_gaybrains ) which, according to the researchers, still leaves the question of nature vs. nurture but confirms the suspicion that homosexual inclinations are involuntary. As for Tracey Ullman That is probably best left unsaid. If I had to describe it, I would change the subject immediately.

On some Thursdays, The Daily Show suffers from a funny tank on E. Late night shows such as this make or break in the first five minuets; and early on May 12th TDS was behind in the count. After an overall quiet opener Jon seemed to let a perfect pitch float by. In the Jon Bolton segment, after a very big build up during George Voinovich's speech at the end Jon sat there as to say, What, I need to make a joke? Yes Jon we needed one there. Tracy Ullman was the guest for the night; anyone not familiar with Tracy should know that she had her own show where a family named Simpson got their start. Also to note that for those of you who didnt know, which Jon said you wouldnt, Nancy Geller is a producer who has worked for HBO. In an typical, some what amusing but never 100% plug-interview, Tracy talked about her family and her new HBO special, and ranted over Kim Cattrall's visit to TDS Other show highlights came from the Gay Watch segment and rerun of an Ed Helms report, but the win for the night came from a relief pitcher. The Bullpen of TDS is the graphics department, when the team comes in trouble the department can pull through and save the show. The seven-second delay, when the corner graphic is displayed and viewers see it but audience members havent yet looked over to a monitors to catch the graphic, was at its best Tursday night. This time you could actually hear people quietly laughing as they read this graphic out loud, Just Shoot Me. This is what the show needed; after that it seemed like Jon might be saving it all for this one joke. In a speech from Gov. Jeb Bush of Florida discussing a new law he said When there is a life threatening situation to have to retreat, uh, and put yourself in a very precarious position, you know, defies common sense. To which Jon said No wonder the Governor issued a related decree renaming the States Hurricane evacuation routes as Pussy Promenades In the words of Chirs Berman Back, back, back, back, GONE!

The Daily Show May 12, 2005 Tonights guest, Tracey Ullman. The Daily show is the thinking persons safety release valve. We all know the outrages exist, yet in a world of so many outrageous events, levity is just about the only legal form of release available to us. But when we sit down with The Daily Show, we are presented a tongue-in-cheek look at the days events which allows us to laugh. Laughing is good for your health and helps prevent antisocial behavior. Jon Stewart started the episode with his signature day-in-outrageous-headlines monologue. Beginning with commentary on Wednesdays capitol hill chaos resulting from a wayward Cessna, we cringed and laughed as we learned that the only person in Washington, D.C. who was apparently unaware of the errant plane was our President and Commander-in-Chief. As one writer put it, George W. Bush was "blissfully unaware." ( Blissfully unaware - http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2005/05/11/AR2005051102170.html) Stewart continued to the next story, which was about John Bolton, who is President Bushs nominee for U.S. representative to the United Nations. Through nipple tickles, a "be-otch", and a stunned look, we were treated to another round of Stewart's inimitable wry wit and hysterics. As always, Stewarts style is aimed not so much at downplaying the importance the days news, but more toward humorously acknowledging the common persons helplessness in stemming the relentless tide of disturbing world events. As if those stories werent all enough to whip one into a satisfyingly hilarious outrage, we learned of Floridas brand spankin new self-defense law. Apparently, its now okay to shoot someone if you feel threatened by them. However, "you may want to think twice about urinating on them, thats still illegal." I guess that blows my assertion that levity is the only legal release we have. That statement should have been footnoted with "*unless you live in Florida and you feel threatened." Again, the incisive commentary and wit are still razor sharp, but its the tone of delivery that inspires us to laughter in spite of the controversy and outrage du jour. I mean, come on, who cant laugh about tidbits like the "Pussy Promenade"? Or how about a Speedo holster" (ewww!) that makes it easier to make sure youre packin more than what God gave you on the lovely beaches of Florida (you got a permit to carry that thing, hot stuff?). Next up was Ed Helms story about Jim Lesczynski, a Libertarian who seemingly wants to teach kids to pop a cap in someones ass with his program called Guns for Tots. No, Napoleon, not those kinds of tots. No, Mr. Lesczynski believes that children should have the opportunity to play with toy guns leaving it to the parents to decide whats appropriate. Ed Helms, in his typically over-the-top deadpan manner showed us how some of the students from P.S. 72 in Harlem reacted to Lesczynskis charitable gun offer. One child, holding up a stuffed Winnie-the-Pooh, explained that "these are the kinds of toys" she prefers. Maybe Ted I mean, Jim should move his program to Florida. And in a segment called Gaywatch, we learned from Stewart that the " anti-gay force is really the all gay buffet". Mayor Jim West from Spokane, Washington has tried to ban gays from having any rights and has spoken out against homosexuals. Yet, as we recently learn, he is gay. And as if that werent enough, he prefers them underage. He likes to pick them at the peak of ripeness, perhaps. Low hanging fruit, anyone? Really, it's not so bad though, he still speaks out against his gay brethren. Tracey Ullman joined Jon Stewart as his guest tonight, promoting her new HBO special Live & Exposed, a self-described autobiographical show. She shared a clip, a story about her daughter, Mabel, and a discussion of the possible existence of a moon landing conspiracy. Their discussion went further, exploring the U.S. governments own concerns about having a safety release valve. Jon Stewart quipped that, "bombing someplace is our way of blowing off steam", referring to periodic U.S. military intervention in foreign affairs. Very droll. Unfortunately, our moment of Zen was a little less than entertaining last night. A discussion between Wolf Blitzer and a researcher in Sweden concerning nature versus nurture with regard to the real cause of homosexuality is not nearly as amusing as the "Speedo holster."

[I hope my inclusion of several URLs is not a problem since this is not an actual comment but more like an actual sample entry...] 12 May 2005 Despite extreme sleep deprivation and the resulting sensation of burning eyes, I stayed up to watch the Daily Show with Jon Stewart (not with Jon Stewart, of course). Mr. Stewart kicked off the show with the usual jab at the current administration. This time it was regarding the plane scare http://www.nytimes.com/2005/05/13/national/13plane.html at the White House. The White House had decided to not inform Bush of the possibility of impending doom (doom, I say!) while he was on a suburban bike ride. A small Cessna plane had flown into restricted airspace over Washington and the terror level immediately shot up. Washington took it very well and very calmly -- well, besides the whole deal about having Congress and the White House completely evacuated. You would think they would at least inform the president if it is a big enough threat to evacuate everyone. Anyway, it turned out that the pilots of the tiny plane had simply lost their way. Way to go, DC. Next up was Bush's controversial candidate for ambassador to the United Nations. He and his Republican buddies all want John Bolton http://www.rferl.org/featuresarticle/2005/05/1d138bdc-3d14-48bb-96c8-f93d34add520.html for this position but an equally adamant portion of the Senate does not. This has created a huge divide and many senators are currently standing up against Bush's nomination. Huzzah for standing up for your opinions, anti-Bolton people! Perhaps the cold clutches of Washington have not wrapped themselves around your balls and given them a sickening twist! Stewart agrees (orgasmically) by rubbing his nipples. Of course, as always, this high dies fast as the senators give in and decide to give Bolton a chance. So much for that. Now it is time for the brother, Jeb Bush, and his state, Florida. Recently, J. Bush signed a new crime force bill http://www.thepeninsulaqatar.com/Display_news.asp?section=World_News&subsection=Americas&month=April2005&file=World_News2005042885020.xml in which Floridians can immediately open fire if they feel threatened. This extreme attempt at improving self-defense has raised quite a few eyebrows. This makes us Floridians seem like we have a governor who is a little trigger-happy and perhaps a little too extreme. "He renamed hurricane evacuation routes as 'pussy promenades'," Stewart said jokingly. Ed Helm's old report (2003) followed. "Banned Aid" featured one man's struggle to save today's youth... by providing kids in Harlem with toy guns as part of his program, Toys for Tots http://www.weeklystandard.com/Content/Public/Articles/000/000/002/188aqazu.asp . Nice. It was a poorly planned response to the New York City Council's desire to ban water pistols. The report was still funny and somewhat surreal and the toddler at the very end clutching a gun was both disturbing and adorable. Babies with berettas, aww... And cue the Cher! Time for some of Gaywatch. This time the spyglass is on Jim West http://www.kvewtv.com/index.php?sect_rank=1&story_id=183073 , a long-time legislator heavily against gay rights, has been outed. He admitted to having relations with men and spending time in Internet chatrooms on sites like Gay.com. "I don't deny that," said West, a walking oxymoron, of his old homosexual habits. He even called this ordeal a "brutal outing". Jon Stewart retorts that it is, in fact, perfect irony and points out something that we should have known from the start: the anti-gay Republicans -- "They're all gay!" Well, duh. Gaywatch Part II featured Wolf Blitzer discussing with the guest on his show about a new Swedish study about how homosexual and heterosexual men react to pheromones differently. At this point, my sleep deprivation had almost completely taken over and I just wanted the Swedish lady to go away. Moments before I topple over onto the ground, I see Tracy Ullman prance about onscreen, picking her underwear out of her 'arse'. It is a clip to promote her new HBO special, Tracy Ullman: Live and Exposed http://www.nj.com/columns/ledger/zollerseitz/index.ssf?/base/columns-0/111596027993920.xml (Saturday @ 9:30 PM). Ullman finally gets to the couch and, immediately, she takes over the interview. Stewart manages to get a few chuckles here and there (not from the audience but actually from Stewart... I do not think the audience had time to react, really) but most of the time he watched Ullman do random voices and molest his couch. Now, watching a gyrating, screeching, flailing Tracy Ullman while you're just about ready to rip your brains out just to feel the sweetness of quiet sleep is possibly one of the most irritating things of all time (that and car alarms... and accidentally spilling change under your seat). Honestly, I spent most of my time feeling sorry for Stewart because he just looked emb

[I hope my inclusion of several URLs is not a problem since this is not an actual comment but more like an actual sample entry...] Despite extreme sleep deprivation and the resulting sensation of burning eyes, I stayed up to watch May 12's Daily Show with Jon Stewart (um, not with Jon Stewart, of course). Mr. Stewart kicked off the show with the usual jab at the current administration. This time it was regarding the plane scare (link) at the White House. The White House had decided to not inform Bush of the possibility of impending doom (doom, I say!) while he was on a suburban bike ride. A small Cessna plane had flown into restricted airspace over Washington and the terror level immediately shot up. Washington took it very well and very calmly -- well, besides the whole deal about having Congress and the White House completely evacuated. You would think they would at least inform the president if it is a big enough threat to evacuate everyone. Anyway, it turned out that the pilots of the tiny plane had simply lost their way. Way to go, DC. Next up was Bush's controversial candidate for ambassador to the United Nations. He and his Republican buddies all want John Bolton (link) for this position but an equally adamant portion of the Senate does not. This has created a huge divide and many senators are currently standing up against Bush's nomination. Huzzah for standing up for your opinions, anti-Bolton people! Perhaps the cold clutches of Washington have not wrapped themselves around your balls and given them a sickening twist! Stewart agrees (orgasmically) by rubbing his nipples. Of course, as always, this high dies fast as the senators give in and decide to give Bolton a chance. So much for that. Now it is time for the brother, Jeb Bush, and his state, Florida. Recently, J. Bush signed a new crime force bill (link) in which Floridians can immediately open fire if they feel threatened. This extreme attempt at improving self-defense has raised quite a few eyebrows. This makes us Floridians seem like we have a governor who is a little trigger-happy and perhaps a little too extreme. "He renamed hurricane evacuation routes as 'pussy promenades'," Stewart said jokingly. Ed Helm's old report (2003) followed. "Banned Aid" featured one man's struggle to save today's youth... by providing kids in Harlem with toy guns as part of his program, Toys for Tots(link). Nice. It was a poorly planned response to the New York City Council's desire to ban water pistols. The report was still funny and somewhat surreal and the toddler at the very end clutching a gun was both disturbing and adorable. Babies with berettas, aww... And cue the Cher! Time for some of Gaywatch. This time the spyglass is on Jim West (link), a long-time legislator heavily against gay rights, has been outed. He admitted to having relations with men and spending time in Internet chatrooms on sites like Gay.com. "I don't deny that," said West, a walking oxymoron, of his old homosexual habits. He even called this ordeal a "brutal outing". Jon Stewart retorts that it is, in fact, perfect irony and points out something that we should have known from the start: the anti-gay Republicans -- "They're all gay!" Well, duh. Gaywatch Part II featured Wolf Blitzer discussing with the guest on his show about a new Swedish study about how homosexual and heterosexual men react to pheromones differently. At this point, my sleep deprivation had almost completely taken over and I just wanted the Swedish lady to go away. Moments before I topple over onto the ground, I see Tracy Ullman prance about onscreen, picking her underwear out of her 'arse'. It is a clip to promote her new HBO special, Tracy Ullman: Live and Exposed (link) (Saturday @ 9:30 PM). Ullman finally gets to the couch and, immediately, she takes over the interview. Stewart manages to get a few chuckles here and there (not from the audience but actually from Stewart... I do not think the audience had time to react, really) but most of the time he watched Ullman do random voices and molest his couch. Now, watching a gyrating, screeching, flailing Tracy Ullman while you're just about ready to rip your brains out just to feel the sweetness of quiet sleep is possib

May 13, 2005. From TVSquad.coms global recap headquarters on my bed, its Kristina Kuzma. When you need a recap of jokes and news stories you could get from a Google search, turn to TVSquad, where we do the searches for you. The show begins with the days headlines. Top story? The latest big security scare a plane flying in unrestricted DC air space. Major news networks are beating this horse to death, so Stewart opts for another angle: The only guy who didnt know it was coming? The President. News24 (http://www.news24.com/News24/World/News/0,,2-10-1462_1704502,00.html) has White House press secretary Scott McClellan explaining its because of the trust the President has in his security detail. How reassuring. More on John Bolton, the man for whom the vote guaranteeing his nomination to the position of U.S. ambassador to the United Nations had been delayed by public misgivings from four Senate Foreign Relation Committees Republicans (http://abcnews.go.com/Politics/wireStory?id=753818). Most vocal in his misgivings was Sen. George Voinovich (R Ohio): John Bolton would have been fired if he worked for a major corporation. Which is exactly why Voinovich voted to send Boltons nomination to the Senate, where party line voting is sure to confirm him as ambassador. I think weve all been Voinoviched, Jon. Also mentioned: Florida passing a bill allowing any Floridian who feels threatened at home or in public to open fire (http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2005/04/25/AR2005042501553.html). The high points? A lawyer noting, weve prosecuted motorists for road rage for pointing a gun under this law he can point and shoot, and Governor Jeb Bushs reasoning for signing it, retreating from life-threatening situations defies common sense. Tell that to those that were fleeing when the White House was evacuated during that plane scare. Tonights feature is a repeat of a report by Ed Helms. Helms is in good form as he investigates Jim Lesczynski, a New York Libertarian who runs the program Guns for Tots, which donates toy guns to children. I knew the Libertarian party was that of personal responsibility, but this seems to be taking it a little far. We choose to encourage use of guns and addictive substances included is footage of Lesczynski and other Libertarians donating cigarettes to scrambling crowds - but dont blame us if you choose to use them. Highlight: footage of a young girl in front of a Harlem school being interviewed holding a large teddy bear. What kind of stuff are they teaching us? She asks. Good question. Lescynski says we have to reach out. In response, Helms notes: Who needs familiarity with firearms more than kids in Harlem? Next up, Gaywatch, The Daily Shows infrequent round-up of stories pertaining to well. You know, gays. Or closeted gays who get brutally outed when a newspaper hires someone to pose as a minor on a gay website to see what happens, as is the case with Jim West, the staunchly anti-gay Mayor of Spokane. A bastardized quote from Jon if youre looking for a gay man, just cruise the anti-gay buffet. I wonder if it works the same for women? Also shown is CNNs coverage of a new study out of Sweden about gay and straight mens different reactions to pheromones (http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/7792705/). Wolf Blitzer asked a scientist if it shed any light on whether it made a difference in the debate of whether being gay was a choice she noted that it didnt seem to be a chosen response. Jon said that neither orientation seemed to react at all to Axe body spray. Returning for another interview is Tracy Ullman, there to promote her HBO special Tracy Ullman: Live and Exposed, premiering on HBO on Saturday, May 14. Check your local listings. The interviews a bit awkward shes incredibly funny, but poor Jon cant get a word in edgewise. Still, shes hilarious in her own right and, well, its not like Jon doesnt get the other fifteen minutes of the show to shine, so its all good. Catch her special, its bound to entertain. Thats all for now well see you Monday.

As America celebrated the 3 year, 8 month anniversary of 9/11, a true threat shook us from our Homeland Security blanket. Namely, a Cessna flew over Washington DC, loosening bowels and scattering important business-folk across the city. As Jon Stewart played footage of the unorganized mob, he offered his own terrorism advice: "Run, you magnificient bastards!" Bet of the night: Some blogger will refer to North Korea as the "forgotten middle child of the Axis of Evil" more often than is funny. Watch your internet for this. Stephen Colbert's "This Week in God" featured an "Indian Daily Double," covering both Indians and their more politically correct namesake, Injuns. The Native Americans banned gay marriage, thus eliminating all problems from their society and ensuring God's favor, whereas the Indians monkeyed with trees in Calcutta and drink tea. It was also comforting to know that God was angry at Bellamy Road, but not at strawberry lovers. Does this mean He hates Mexicans though? Lewis Black came on next (was tonight a "segment extravaganza night?") to get angry about China deifying Yao Ming as their Great White Hope, Kim Jong Il's government-mandated Godzilla rip-off, and most importantly, Americans spending $12 million to see House of Wax. I think America came out on the bottom of that one. Al Roker came on the show to sell his new book, a collection of stories about fathers and fatherhood, many written by people who neither own testicles nor are Al Roker; a suspect investment at best. The interview segment went well enough, but many jokes felt forced, leaving me with one lingering thought: Al Roker is not a comedian.