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And I Quote: The best one-liners of the week
by Bob Sassone, posted Jun 24th 2005 5:01PM
"My doctor says one thing, my butcher says another. Who am I supposed to believe?" - Jack, about his cholesterol level, on Just Shoot Me.- "Here's some great news: an 11 year old Boy Scout who disappeared in the mountains of Utah late last week has been found perfectly healthy. It turns out, when he heard about the acquital, he was just hiding from Michael Jackson." - Jay Leno
- "In the news business, that's called 'an exclusive.'" - Stephen Colbert, to porn star/California gubernatorial candidate Mary Carey, after she said "you're my first fart," on The Daily Show.
- "Boy it was hot today. It was so hot today that runaway bride Jennifer Wilbanks had to put sunscreen on her eyeballs." - Jay Leno
