"Mess O'Potamia": Like they said last night, Congress wants progress updates about Iraq. "It's like a report card if you went to Fiasco Junior High!" Why are they starting to care now, two and a half years after the start of the war? Geez. Talk about procrastination. In other news, Donald Rumsfeld trying to act understanding is one of the most bizarre things I have ever witnessed (right up there with some Animal Planet footage I once saw of a giraffe giving birth).

Jon covers some more news about the oil executives not getting sworn in during their hearing. Jon rants a little about the lack of embellishments in the current administration's lies. Remember the good ol' days of Clinton where he actually made an effort to cover-up? Now, it's just a straightforward no or simple sentence structure... none of that "definition of 'is' is" stuff. By the way, I have another item on my Christmas wishlist now: "Ike Likes C**k" pins. Beautiful. The "damaging, untrue statements about the war" slot machine (JACKA$$!) was pretty neat, too. I hope they keep finding interesting ways of making use of those massive screens.
 
Dan Bakkedahl does a report on Tom Cruise/Katie Holmes. Seems a bit dated, doesn't it? Didn't Cruise and Holmes die, like, five years ago? A great part of this report is the "Please Stand By" sign with Battlefield Earth Travolta. Ahh, you Scientologists and your ghost aliens. This moment is second only to the Spongebob/Patrick picture.

Tonight's guest is Richard A. Clarke, writer of The Scorpion's Gate. It's about a nefarious Secretary of Defense that twists intelligence about terrorists and WMDs to invade a country full of oil. In other words, this book is pure fiction. "When do they go to the wizards' school?" Jon asks (Jon... you just had to remind me about the midnight opening of a certain magic-related film that I could not attend, didn't you?). This interview goes smoothly, but it is not particularly exciting or enlightening. Nice, solid interview.

Stephen Colbert reminds Jon to come over for some great cranberry sauce on Thanksgiving, but Jon politely turns down the invitation because he has to be with his family that day. What follows is the most adorable Colbert moment in months. A sad Colbert is a cute Colbert. He and Jon are, like, so totally in love, you guys. Alright, here it is, your Moment of Zen: Bill Frist just won't shut the hell up about "cut-and-run".