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K-Fed ponders stripping

by Adam Finley, posted Mar 14th 2006 12:32PM

kevin federlineBritney's hubby Kevin Federline told Blender recently that if his career as a crappy rap artist doesn't pan out that he'll probably turn to stripping.

Lucky for you I just finished work on my time machine and visited the future. As it turns out, Mr. Federline will in fact become a stripper. Here's what I saw during his first night at the Boom Boom Club:

Kevin [on stage]: That's right, ladies, soak it all in.

[Women cheer and hoot]

Kevin [removes shirt]: Is it gettin' hot in here? Oh my!

[Cheers become louder]

Kevin: Now, let's get these pants off. Ow! Damn it! [falls over]

Woman in front row: Kevin?

Kevin [continues to struggle with his pants]: What's the frickin' deal, here?

Woman in front row: Kevin? Sweetie? You need to take your shoes off before you take your pants off. They won't slip over your feet otherwise.

Kevin: I'll figure it out!

Woman: Your song just ended.

Kevin [yelling to guy behind bar]: Rob! Hey, Rob! I need a pair of scissors! And another new pair of pants to wear home!

Rob: I told you after the third time it happened I wasn't going to help you anymore.

It was a sad spectacle really, but there's your proof. Stay strong, K-Fed. 

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Sally

I see porn and a tell-all book in his future.
I love a good train wreck.

March 20 2006 at 9:28 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Cyndi

Britney, wake up child, he is an ugly dude,send him packing & find someone more your style. He will bring you down & use your name for his own self satisfaction.
Once you cut the golden cord $$, he will have to resort to more than stripping to make a dime. He just doesn't have what it takes to strip.

March 19 2006 at 1:53 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Erica

I'll pay him to keep his clothes on! He could make a fortune that way!

March 19 2006 at 1:53 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Donna

Kevin will make some money on anything that he does, becauase of the people out there that just want to see anything to do with Britney, it is not his fault it is our fault that he thinks he has talent because we cannot leave the the whole thing alone. If we stop paying attention to what they do, they will drift into the background and become the has beens that they are.

March 19 2006 at 1:51 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Stacey

I agree, Kevin is not at all attractive. He looks like he needs a bath. I also think he us definitely using Britney for her name and money. i also don't think he really wants children. I think he just continues to have kids with her because he figures it will be easier to keep her that way. I feel sorry for Britney. She needs to get out and get on with her life. Come back to the Biz!..Tour "with" your kids!

March 19 2006 at 1:51 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
j

Ok... Someone needs to step in here. Mom, Dad? Brittany needs your guidance.. and support.
Apparently Kevin isn't 'all that'. Stripping!?
You MUST know where this is heading. It's NOT about you with him Brittany.... it's ALL about HIM. If it was about you, well, real love just doesn't act like that. Time to go away with Mom and baby and do some real honest thinking. Time to say no Brittany. You are a beautiful, talented... although lost.. woman, losing your way in 'stardom' and riches. DON'T let the world, money, and Kevin take you down. Turn it around now, you can do it... but you have to do it NOW.. you are losing ground.

You know, I really hope you pull through this. One of the biggest gifts you can give the world (and yourself) is a healed life'. What other people
think of you is least important. What you think of you is the most important. If your life IS what you want, then, so be it. If not, lift your head up, and change it. Our essence is our greatness. We must be what we
came from... where is it that you came from?

March 19 2006 at 1:49 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Sharon

Please don't do this to Britney and especially your children. Grow up, be a man, get an education and get a decent job instead of sponging off Britney...maybe you'll get some respect from the public.

March 19 2006 at 1:36 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
D

I personally do not feel bad for Britney, I just think she can do a whole lot better.

There are a lot of men with much more going for them than the joke she is with. Men of achievement, of real ambition, and of ideal values and morals. Men who possess a great deal of integrity and thensome. ...not to mention class and intelligence.

I challenge Britney to shop around.

March 19 2006 at 1:35 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
j

Ok... Someone needs to step in here. Mom, Dad? Brittany needs your guidance.. and support. Apparently Kevin isn't 'all that'. Stripping!? You MUST know where this is heading. It's NOT about you with him Brittany.... it's ALL about HIM. If it was about you, well, real love just doesn't act like that. Time to go away with Mom and baby and do some real honest thinking. Time to say no Brittany. You are a beautiful, talented... although lost... woman, losing your way in 'stardom' and riches. DON'T let the world, money, and Kevin take you down. Turn it around now, you can do it... but you have to do it NOW.. you are losing ground.

You know, I really hope you pull through this. One of the biggest gifts you can give the world (and yourself) is a healed life'. What other people think of you is least important. What you think of you is the most important. If your life IS what you want, then, so be it. If not, lift your head up, and change it. Our essence is our greatness. We must be what we came from... where is it that you came from?

March 19 2006 at 1:29 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Kaite

Well I think that you all should lighten up of K-Fed he is doing his best and I dont think he should become a stipper but I mean if he wants to then let him. He is trying his best he already has 3 kids and if him and Brit are having another one then let them and stop bashing them and Kevin especially I mean it is their life and there is nothing that we as america can do about it. It is there life and if that is what they want then let them be.

March 19 2006 at 1:25 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

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