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Things I Hate About TV: Prison Break's stupid retcons
I finally got around to watching Prison Break from last week and although a decent episode, it
exemplified one of my biggest pet peeves about story telling-- stupid retcons. For those that don't know what a
"retcon" is, it stands for retroactive continuity, and my abbreviated definition would go something like this: "adding onto
or changing something or someone's history from what we already knew." I don't mind changes to a character's back
story, but they have to be done right, not just for the "shock value" that was all the rage during this
episode. It seemed as if the writers took every character and just made them the opposite of what they currently were, as if they were trying to make them redeemable. There's the problem though: they're criminals, they're not really supposed to be likable or upstanding citizens. That's why it's so much fun wondering what's going to happen once Michael and company make it outside Fox River's walls. Is Michael going to be able live with himself knowing he unleashed T-Bag on society again just for the sake of rescuing his brother? If C-Note or Abruzzi killed someone once free, would that innocent life have been worth Lincoln's freedom?
I didn't need to know that Michael and Lincoln didn't really get along
beforehand; that was implied and should have been picked up upon by everyone watching the show. It was stupid to see
that Sara used to be a heroin addict; now it seems like her being at the prison is more of a self-punishment than her
rebelling against her father and wanting to make a difference. C-Note goes from being an upstanding soldier to your
stereotypical "angry black man?" No thanks. Did we learn a single new thing from the Vice-President's
flashbacks? Not really -- the reason her brother's dental records matched the corpse's is because he apparently had his
teeth removed. Whoopee.
T-Bag's story was fine; I liked parts and disliked others. I didn't like how he said
he was actually trying to change. I did, however, like his quick and psychotic snap back to the T-Bag we love to hate,
when he threatened to track down the woman that he was seeing, and her children. The only history that really seemed
"in character" to me was Fernando's. Although he did commit crimes, they were always slightly playful and all
for the love of Marisol, who is the whole reason he's even attempting the escape. Why oh why didn't we get even a scene
of Westmoreland's history? His is arguably the most mysterious -- is he or is he not DB Cooper? They could have played
with that for the entire episode, and is much more a part of the team then Sara is. Yet we learned nothing.
A friend of mine just said the other day that there are two shows on Fox's Monday night that he loves to watch. One
is so good it's hard imagining TV without it, the other is just so bad it's good. I think I have to agree with him,
because while I'll still tune in every week, I don't think Prison Break is
going to be winning any Emmy's this year.
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