I went through a brief professional wrestling phase in junior high. This was when Hulk Hogan was in his prime and you could also see the likes of Rowdy Roddy Piper, the Iron Sheik, and Hillbilly Jim, among others. Eventually I got over watching men in tiny pants strutting around the ring and gesticulating, but professional wrestling kept going on without me, turning into a huge phenomenon and becoming, as one friend of mine put it, "a male soap opera."

He's right. The storylines have become more complex, and sometimes downright silly. This time, however, Vince McMahon may have topped himself. On April 30, during the WWE pay-per-view special "Backlash," Mr. McMahon will wrestle God. Wrestling fans already know that this is the culmination of an ongoing storyline which involved the sinister McMahon getting beat by Shawn Michaels, a born again Christian. I don't have pay-per-view, so I won't be able to watch, but here's what God had to say:

Adam: So what can we expect?

God: [Holding up fists] You can expect to see these Almighty meat tenderizers unleash a beating of biblical proportions upon mine enemy! Hoo yeah!

Adam: You're really serious about this, aren't you?

God: Listen, punk, I didn't spend six hours creating the avocado so some wrestling promoter with a chip on his shoulder could start talking trash. Ya'll better tune in and watch me alter his DNA with a folding chair to the back of the head.

Adam: I must say, this is a bit of a shock. I always imagined you being kind and understanding.

God: I am, but kindness only gets you so far. You know Nathan, the guy who built the ark?

Adam: Noah.

God: Right. He flat out refused to build it when I asked him. Let's just say a few seconds in my patented Deluxe Sleeper Hold changed his mind.

Adam: Well, it was interesting to learn more about you, God.

God: I also like Celtic music. Not many people know that.