American Idol: Mexicans for Taylor

by Lacy Hall, posted May 17th 2006 9:21AM

ai logoAnna Johns asks a very important question -- with Chris gone, does anybody still care about American Idol? My answer is yes and no. Chris was my number one dude, and I'm destroyed that he's gone. The thrill of the game has left me. I no longer feel the shrill of excitement every Tuesday when Chris takes the stage. I am now filled with blood lust, and I thirst for the demise of Elliott. I don't blame America for Chris' untimely elimination. I blame Elliott. I'm not exactly sure why, but somehow he is at fault. It's certainly not me. Taylor deserves to be in the finale, and so did Chris. Katharine? Eh, I guess. Elliott? Not so much.

With Chris gone, I have a new reason to watch Idol. I want Taylor to destroy them. Destroy them all. When we first met Taylor, he seemed the most unlikely candidate for American Idol. He's got gray hair. He's kinda tubby. And he looks like he's taking a dump when when he sings. This whole season has been absurd, so why not end it with a fireworks display of absurdity. I want Elliott and Katharine to be buried alive under the avalanche of votes that Taylor will receive. I want every man, woman, and child to vote for Taylor. I want more Americans to vote for Taylor then there are actually in America. I want Mexicans to illegally swarm over the border like locusts, with their Cingular Wireless phones in hand, just so they can vote for Taylor. I want him to destroy those other two. I want Taylor to rise from Chris' fallen ashes and pour acid rain all over Elliott and Katharine. I know that being bitter over Chris won't bring him back, but it makes me feel a hell of a lot better.  

Elliott Yamin- Whatever magic juice Elliott drank last week has worn off because he was back to his boring self last night. I'm not sure of the ingredients of that special brew, but apparently Paula was his dealer. I thought all the song choices for Elliott tonight were pretty lame. I actually feel bad for him that Paula picked his judges song. Of all the judges, that's the last person I would want to pick my song. Well, she tried to take all the credit for his success so I guess she can now take credit for his failure. I know that a lot of you say that Chris always sounded the same in all his songs, but I feel that way with Elliott. Every song sounds exactly the same to me. Even when he sang the Journey song, it just sounds like he's gargling with the lost souls of a thousand fallen cabaret performers. And I don't know why he picked that Ray Charles song for himself. I don't think it highlighted his talents very well or made him unforgettable. It just felt like more of the same old Elliott that comes back week after week. After week, after week, after week, after week.

Katharine McPhee- If anybody looked like they were on the brink of a nervous breakdown tonight, it was Katharine. I have actually been pretty surprised at her rapid emotional withering in recent weeks. During the early stages of the competition, Katharine looked like she was one of the strongest performers, and I mean that in the emotional sense. She seems like a great young woman with very little ego or reservations about herself. She is geographically closer to her home, then many of the other contestants and she has always seemed to shine with confidence. But this past few weeks have really chipped Katharine's smile.

There were several times tonight when it looked like she was about to absolutely break down in tears. There was one uncomfortable moment when she said to the judges, "You guys have really been hard on me the past few weeks." And she's right. Without a doubt, Katharine is the best vocal performer left, and yet the judges just tear her apart week after week. Sure, she has screwed up. Her lackluster performance last week was evidence of that. But tonight? She did pretty well. "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" was absolutely magnificent, and the judges heavily praised her for it. But they were really harsh on the other two songs. No, she didn't do as well on the other two, but they were still pretty freaking good. Was there any reason for Paula and Randy to rip on her? They seem to be harsher on her than any other contestant, and I don't know why. But the thing that bothers me most is doesn't seem like Katharine can handle it. When she is praised, she absolutely beams. But when she is criticized, she just withers, and it's uncomfortable to watch. I just don't think she has the strength to be the next American Idol. If she can't handle Paula's lame quips then how is she going to handle Howard Stern saying she's got a fat butt?

Taylor Hicks- I think I've already covered my feelings about Taylor. He's not my first choice, but he's my number two. I really do just love the guy. He just has that star quality, and on top of it, he can really sing. Sure, he looks like he's pooping while he's singing, but hey, whatever. I'm amused by it. Sure, it's over-the-top and completely absurd, but it's fun as hell to watch. I thought Taylor absolutely nailed it tonight. He gave us all the dimensions of Taylor that we love -- sensitive, microphone-squeezing Taylor, crazy-squeal-and-hug-himself Taylor, and (my favorite) windmill-dance-moves Taylor. And he gets a million coolness points for recreating the Bruce Springsteen dance sequence with Paula Abdul. But it would have been a lot cooler if he actually pulled Courtney Cox Arquette out of the audience instead. I mean, was she not available for a Fox cameo? She couldn't be that busy since Friends went off the air. Humping David Arquette and being a shoulder to cry on for Jennifer Aniston couldn't be taking up that much of her time.

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Marion N

Taylor all the way!

May 18 2006 at 11:26 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
lynn

Lacy..you just make me laugh!! Your thoughts are often so close to mine...it is scary.

May 17 2006 at 8:37 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Rabbit

Jeff, don't apologize for refuting anyone's point. It's all in good fun. I guess time will tell on everyone's personality. But I think we should agree to disagree on the reaction point. I believe you can very well tell someone's personality from their reaction to an abnormal situation. It is the normal situations that we can manage to hide our true selves in. We have had practice to perfect our reactions in a normal situation. As for me, when I was 21, when someone from the industry I was interested in gave me constructive criticism, I listened and tried to make adjustments. (I will admit to thinking just my parents were morons and I knew more than they did about EVERYTHING. :) All the other contestants seemed to have listened to some extent. Kat has not. She just doesn't seem to connect to most of the songs that she sings. I am not saying she is not talented. She just needs to work on the performance aspect of it. I might listen to her CD (if someone bought it for me), but I wouldn't buy a ticket to watch her perform. Whereas, with Taylor, I think he is a lot of fun to watch. AND, I think DIVA K is very capable of throwing a temper tantrum when she is not happy. She has kept herself in check but from the looks she has given and some of her comments, I see trouble abrewin' down the road, man.

Hope to catch up with you on the next AI blog.

May 17 2006 at 7:37 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Jeff

Sorry to refute a second time, but I just don't agree that you can decide a person's personality or detect flaws simply by watching (on freaking TV) their reactions while in a completely abnormal situation. Kat is 21 years old. She obvioulsy hasn't had a ton of world experiance considering she went to college in the same area she grew up. Elliott is 27 and Taylor is 29. I don't know about you, but I managed myself quite differently from when I was 21 and 29. Throw in the public spectacle of it all, and it's quite a road to walk perfectly the first time.

I don't know if she is egotistical or not, just as I don't know if Taylor is really this cool fun neat guy. It's TV. I prefer to focus on their singing and their potential to sell not just one record, but two or three or four records. In today's music business you need a niche and you need to fit a format.

May 17 2006 at 6:39 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Rabbit

jcvs:

Nope. Wasn't aware of the article. I never said that the finalists would not be committed at all to AI. As a matter of fact, I heard that the 12 finalists are contractually obligated for 1 year to go on tour for AI. I don't know if any of this stuff is true BUT, a 90 day committment is a lot easier for any person to deal with than 2 YEARS. According to what you have read, if AI rejects something within the 90 day period, after that time frame, if the artist wants to jump on it, he/she can. I think most business men would wait 90 days to make a deal, they won't wait 2 years.

I still think we would have some very fine high drama if DIVA K wins. I don't think it would happen with the others. Read the point Rose makes above. She is absolutely right on target with her comments.

May 17 2006 at 6:09 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
TC

And unfortunately, Dancing in the Dark wasn't that impressive. He's an old soul and it seems obvious that he can't sing in the modern era.

I think he's going to win. Cowell & Clive Davis will have to figure out what they're going to do with him. It should be interesting.

Actually, finals week should be great, because at that point Taylor will have to sing a contemporary song (the song written for the two finalists). He'll either pull it off or crash and burn horribly (the latter seems more likely), but still will win, I think.

May 17 2006 at 5:34 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
TC

I'm sure Taylor's 60's cover album will do okay, and those gigs in Branson will sellout, yet other than that I don't see the appeal.

I'm not sure, yet perhaps you know - Has Taylor sung a song on the show that was written in the last 20 years?

Dancing in the Dark ('84) based on my feeble memory is the "newest" and most "contemporary" song he's done.

May 17 2006 at 5:24 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
bonnie gould

hicks all the way , he;s the one. and he's the one for all the older voters out there. he's gonna be the next idol

May 17 2006 at 5:09 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Ella

GO ELLIOTT!!! GO TAYLOR!!! KAT HAS A NICE VOICE THAT IS LIMITD, NOT WELLED-ROUNDED. SHE SHOULD HAVE BEEN ABLE TO SING "I BELIEVE I CAN FLY", WITHOUT MAKING SUCH AN AWEFUL EXCUSE & CHARGE AGAINST MR. DAVIS, I THINK THAT ALSO IS GOING TO HINDER HER CHANCES IN THE MUSIC/RECORDING BUSINESS, TO BLAME MR. DAVIS(MR.MUSICMAN HIMSELF?) FOR HER INABILITIES TO SING THE SONG WITH EMOTIONS WAS AGAIN, ONE OF HER EGO MISTAKES. IF SHE IS A TRUE SINGER SHE SHOULD HAVE NAILED THAT SONG, THAT IS OF COURSE, IF SHE IS REALLY A NATURAL BORN SINGER, WHICH SHE ISN'T, SO THAT TAKES CARE OF THAT PART. SHE CAN ONLY SING SONGS THAT HAVE NO RANGE AND SONGS THAT MAKE HER THINK SHE IS SEXY. SHE IS UNABLE TO HIT HER HIGH NOTES IN SONGS WITH A WIDE RANGE OF VOCAL SKILLS. EVEN WHEN SINGING OVER THE RAINBOW, SHE WAS UNABLE TO HIT THOSE HIGH NOTES CLEARLY. SHE IS ONLY ABLE TO SING CERTAIN BALLARDS. NOW, EVERYONE IS TALKING ABOUT TAYLOR'S DANCING, WHAT ABOUT KAT INABILITY TO EVEN MOVE IN TIME WITH THE MUSIC...DUH?... SHE HAS NO TIMING WHEN SINGING UPTEMPO SONGS, MAYBE THIS IS WHY SHE SINGS ONLY BALLARDS. PLEASE LET HER KNOW THE BEAT IS ON THE COUNT, NOT AFTER THE COUNT. SHE IS OVER STAGED, OVER GROOMED, OVER RATED! GO ELLIOTT!!!! GO TAYLOR!!! BYE KAT!!!!!!

May 17 2006 at 4:49 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Moni

Kat is by far the best vocalist! She is not fake, nor does she have an attitude. People need to stop with the personal attacks on her! Its just one last attempt at trying to keep her from winning....too bad ppl! She will be in the finals!!!!

May 17 2006 at 4:28 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

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