American Idol: TAYLOR WINS! (finale)
Oh man, I've been patiently twiddling my thumbs for the last 3 hours until the finale aired on the West Coast, so I could finally post this. Taylor Hicks is our new American Idol, and I couldn't be happier. Well, I could be (sigh...Chris). But if I can't have Chris, then I'm happy with the Silver Fox. (I hate that nickname by the way. It makes me feel like I've got a crush on an old man. What's the opposite of being a pedophile? Is there a word for that? 'Cause I might have it.) They really took it down to the last minute too. I was biting my nails at 1 hour and 59 minutes, worried that my TiVo was about to pop up with the dreaded "Erase Now? or Save?" quandary. I felt like I was Mr. Eko on Lost, watching that damn clock. But right at the final seconds, Ryan said Taylor's name. Yes! The crazy windmill-dancing bastard pulled it off! I understand why Taylor's dad was crying, but why was David Hasselhoff?
I must say that for a drawn-out, unnecessarily long two-hour finale, this was a pretty good one. Prince! Mary J. Blige! Live! Clay Aiken! Burt Bacharach! Meatloaf! Okay, I wasn't excited about Meatloaf. What was up with that red handkerchief? Did he think that Katharine was a bull? Other than Taylor taking the cake, I think my favorite moment was the slow motion, homo-erotic hug between Ace and Chris. (Meeeeeow!) My second favorite moment was Clay Aiken surprising his superdork doppelganger by taking the stage. But I'm confused -- am I attracted to Clay's new hipster haircut or repulsed by it? Um, all of the above. My least favorite moment was having to sit through Kellie Pickler's lame dumb blonde routine for the 700th time. Dumb blondes are so two months ago. But this is not a time to talk about Clay's fashion sense or Kellie's IQ...
This is Taylor's time! GOOOOOO Taylor!!!!! SOUL PATROL!!!!!!!!!!!!