Tom Goes to the Mayor: Spray a Carpet or Rug

(S02E07) This episode begins with Tom sitting in a jail cell with another prisoner (Judd Hirsch) who's in jail because he locked his fifteen year old nephew in the cellar over the weekend for pooping and peeing all over his house. Tom, on the other hand, is in jail for killing about four thousand people. His cell mate reacts to this news with, "people are too sensitive these days."

Tom's tale of woe begins when he becomes a salesman for a new device called "Spray a Carpet or Rug," a gigantic machine that emits a foam that turns into carpet instantaneously. The Mayor loves the device because he can carpet all of Jefferton and not have to pay the "lawn mower man" who takes care of the grass and has been pestering the Mayor about a raise. The city council allows Tom to do a test run on Memorial Park, so Tom dons his chemical suit (the foam causes him seizures) and carpets the whole park.

Bob Odenkirk has a hilarious part in this episode as the inventor of "Spray a Carpet or Rug," the money from which allowed him to move from his basement into a three-story building in just seventeen years. He also warns everyone at his seminar never to expose the carpet to direct sunlight, because it causes a horrible chemical reaction. Tom doesn't hear this because of his protective suit, and the result is everyone in the park exploding, melting, and having their skin fall off. Jan Skylar of the Married News Team investigates, but decides nothing is wrong, even though half of her face is starting to peel off.

I knew from shows like Taxi that Judd Hirsch could be funny, but he really embraces the irreverent humor of the show and throws himself into the role. He talks Tom into suicide, explaining that Tom can actually buy life insurance AFTER he dies. As Tom stands on a stool with a noose around his neck, Hirsch's character assures his soon-to-be-dead pal that, "I've tried it a few times, it's just a little 'woosh' and 'boop' and we're done here."

But before all of that and Tom's arrest, he tries to get rid of all the carpet chemicals in his house, which proves to be difficult because his wife threw his chemical suit out and he's starting to have seizures. While in the midst of a seizure the cops nab him. After his assisted suicide, Tom ends up in a weird existential place that turns out to be Hell, or so we assume.

During the end credits we're also treated to a memorial service for newswoman Jan Skylar before she even actually dies. Also, her hand falls off and sprays blood all over her husband's face. A nice and twisted ending to a rather insane episode.