Moral Orel: God's Chef
(S01E02) This is an early review courtesy of Adult Swim Fix. The televised version will air Sunday late night on Adult Swim.
This initial season of Moral Orel has been shown entirely out of order due to issues with standards and practices, though it hasn't really affected the series all that much since every episode works as a stand-alone anyway. In this particular episode, Orel figures out a way that he can masturbate and not spur God's wrath, and I can only imagine what they had to cut out to make this acceptable for television.
The episode begins at Orel's school, probably the only public school where "Jesus" could be an answer on a science test. Orel decides to use the bathroom not to go "number one" or "number two," but to go "number three." He only learned about "number three" recently, and like most adolescent boys, he can't get enough of it. The janitor catches him in the act and sends him to the principal, who explains to Orel that masturbation is actually worse than murder, and spouts off this fractured logic: "Oral, there are some things that are burned so deep into a person's subconscious that you forget just why they're there. You only know that they've scarred you in such a horrible and personal way that they must be right."
The principal sends Orel to talk to Rev. Putty, who explains that Orel's seed should only be used for procreation and not recreation. Orel turns to his father to see exactly how babies are made, so his father consults the book Fake Facts of Life for Ages 5-15, which list these explanations for ages 5 through 11:
- Babies are little bowls of smiles that fell over in a garden
- Martians shoot goo-goo rays into mommies' tummies
- Faeries make babies out of bubbles
- Babies are made from the skin that flaked off God's foot
- You were born because a stork got pregnant
- You were born because mommy swallowed a watermelon seed
- Babies are made by God's chef visiting ladies at night while they are asleep and injecting him with the delicious glaze from his holy pastry bag
His father tells Orel the last explanation, which leads Orel to masturbating into a pastry bag, sneaking into the homes of all the women on his block, and injecting them with his sperm while they sleep. One month later no one can explain why they've suddenly become pregnant, but the police finally catch Orel and his father explains to him that what he did was wrong, and that he must obey yet another "Lost Commandment," the one that states, "Thou Shalt Only Have Sex Face-To-Face, Man on Top." You know, because that's how Noah forced the animals on the Ark to have sex.
I don't have a whole lot to say about this episode, other than I laughed like crazy all the way through it. It followed the same formula as the rest of the episodes this season of Orel trying to do good but ultimately doing bad and ending up being punished in his father's study. Creator Dino Stamatopoulos has said they plan to break away from that for the next season, so I'm hoping they come up with even more outlandish stories than this one. Those of us with a sick sense of humor will be waiting patiently.