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October 7, 2015

Metalocalypse: The Curse of Dethklok (series premiere)

by Adam Finley, posted Aug 5th 2006 8:02AM

metalocalypse(S01E01) "By the power of all that is evil I command you to awaken and make me a sandwich!"

This is an early review courtesy of Adult Swim Fix.

Are you metal? I don't mean are you made of a durable alloy of some sort, I mean do you RAWK* in every conceivable way that one can RAWK? I think I used to be slightly metal, but my frail body couldn't take it so I had to give it up for folk music. Sad, really.

Anyway, Dethklok is a death metal band of mythical proportions, a group of five musicians who so embody everything that is metal they're unable to really function in any other capacity. They're the idiot savants of metal, which is just fine because their worldwide fan base has made them worth billions of dollars. In the premiere episode, over 300,000 fans gather at the Arctic Circle to hear one song from the band, a jingle they've written for a coffee commercial. Lead singer Nathan Explosion insists the band has not sold out, and that they will not only make coffee metal, they'll make EVERYTHING metal. Encased inside a gigantic cube, the band parachutes from their restaurant/helicopter, missing their target and smashing several people in the process. Then the cube opens its spiked doors to reveal the stage, also killing more people. During the song large pots of coffee are poured onto audience members, burning the skin off their bones. This is why all fans are forced to sign "pain waivers" before entering a Dethklok concert.

Unfortunately for the band, a missile fired at the end of their less-than-a-minute long show hits their chef and he's knocked into the blades of their helicopter. They keep his body alive in several pieces on some weird life support machine, but they have more important things to worry about, such as figuring out how to make dinner. They travel to the "food library" (read: grocery store), which isn't a very metal thing to do, but they're hungry and desperate. Nathan Explosion actually smashes his face through a glass case to get to some sausages, and since he only needs two cups of rice he actually measures it out in the aisle. Cooking for themselves turns out to be too much, so they sew their chef back together so he can cook for them again.

I don't think one can really judge a show absolutely on the first episode, but I think Metalocalypse has potential. Brendon Small, who created Home Movies, brings some of that same dry wit to this venture, but it's really a kind of love letter written in blood to early Metallica, Pantera, Cannibal Corpse and other bands of that ilk. Of course, compared to Dethklok, those bands might as well be clones of Tiny Tim, because only at a Dethklok concert can you have your eye gouged out and force fed to you, or have your severed fingers smoked on stage by one of the band members.

* "RAWK" should be pronounced with a deep guttural tone, as if Satan himself is trying to dislodge a chicken bone from his throat, and should be stretched out into a five-second chant while your eyes roll back inside your head, like this: "RAAAAAAAAAAAWK!!!" Pronunciation key provided free of charge.

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Diabolical Masquerade

For years I have been hoping for a METAL m/ cartoon that was actually funny, Metalocalypse is the answer to my prayers, I seriously love this show and the characters, the references to classic Metal songs, band references, ect, everything, it's great. I really hope the show lasts at least 3 seasons, a show like this is long overdue.
I couldn't be happier with the show!!!! m/

August 27 2006 at 1:26 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

Metalocalypse ruled, Murderface is like my new heroe. Long live METALOCALYPSE!!!

August 10 2006 at 11:27 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

I cannot possibly say enough good things about this show, it is such an ungodly combination of all the niche things I love that it's just plain awesome. To think that years ago watching Home Movies and listening to my black metal would have to be done separately! On it's own Metalocalypse is a very funny show but added to it all the hidden references to great metal is what just puts it a step up in my mind. From the more obvious 'Fintroll's Supermarket' being named after a stellar folk metal band to the remark Toki made about the dead chef making a great album cover being a dig at the Mayhem bootleg album which had pictures of Dead on it after he committed suicide. Okay suicide might not be that funny but damn this show is.

August 09 2006 at 2:45 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
I LOVED this show!

Brandon Small is back in the saddle again, and I couldn't be happier.

I thought Metalocalypse was pure genius. It was quite funny is its grandiose betrayal of Deathklok and their uncultured ways. I liked the music too. This was good stuff. I laughed out loud at the scene in the store, when Skwisgaar Skwisgelf and Toki Wartooth were teasing each other about being a girl.


I'm looking forward to the rest of the season.

August 09 2006 at 12:00 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

This was great in it's grandiose over-exaggeration of excess.

We have what had to be a 60 story tall helicopter to house an 30 foot tall-stage in that box. And the "necessity" to needlessly kill thousands of fans by crushing them with the stage and it's doors to play a one minute song in one of the most remote and inhospitable places in the world as a 1 minute long TV commercial about coffee.

This is my childhood dream realized as a cartoon metal band. A supergroup of people who have nothing to contribute to society outside of their art, who command the respect and lives of all who surround them.

August 07 2006 at 11:32 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

That show was pretty awful. I don't know if it was just me, but I couldn't understand and barely hear anything that was said, and I had the volume up fairly high.

Bring back Sealab and Harvey Birdman and stop with the crappy shows.

August 07 2006 at 9:58 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Michael Shapiro

Adult swim is growing more pathetic by the show..

They are really strecthing now

August 06 2006 at 1:08 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

I love this show! My fave line was at the food library when one of the band members was explaining what GMILF stood for. Here's to hoping for at least a couple of future seasons of Metalocalypse.

August 05 2006 at 6:08 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

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