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All Jonathan wants for Festivus

by Jonathan Toomey, posted Dec 20th 2006 11:04AM

The SopranosSo I had a light evening last night when it came to TV. Nip/Tuck is over, House was a double repeat, and there wasn't much else on that I cared to watch. So I flicked on my Arrested Development DVDs and then I did something terribly stupid.

A friend of mine had sent me a small holiday gift basket, which happened to contain some of that cheap egg-nog that comes in a can. And what did I do with it? I made some of Stamford Andy's "Nogasake," featured on last week's holiday episode of The Office. Remember? He and Michael ordered it at the Benihana restaurant? Well, it was gross. Egg-nog mixed with sake is an absolutely horrible idea. Needless to say, I feel terrible this morning and don't feel like moving. But I suppose I'm well enough to make some Festivus wishes, so here's want I want.

A satisfying end to The Sopranos - So help me, these final nine episodes had better be freakin' amazing. I know there's been a lot of speculation that it's all going to be in Tony's head or that Kevin Finnerty is who he actually is, but if David Chase and Co. pull a St. Elsewhere on us and the whole thing happens inside of a snow globe or whatever... I'm going to be disappointed. I want it to be real.

The two Deadwood films to actually get made - I have to agree with Julia on this one. These two telefilms need to get made and they need to kick copious amounts of ass. I won't settle for anything less. But now there's news that the cast is still waiting to hear about the future of the final Deadwood installments? F#$&ing HBO hoopleheads! Don't get me wrong. I'm excited about John from Cincinnati, but if Deadwood doesn't get the send-off that it deserves? I might have to boycott the new surf drama. Cowabunga... jerks.

Ed and all its Stuckeybowl glory in a big ol' DVD box set - This is a total rip-off from my 2005 Festivus wishes, but that's OK because it never came true. Frankly, I don't care what's holding up this amazing show from being released. Last I recall, it had to do with music licenses or something similar. It just needs to happen. Period. I found this bootleg set for purchase but I'm not sure that I trust it. Anyone want to buy it and tell me if it's any good? Please?

A CSI made for TV movie - I mean a really big one. All three CSI teams working together on one nation-wide man hunt or something similar. That'd be good, wouldn't it? Plus, the unintentional comedy factor would be through the roof. Picture Flack busting out the NY smoothness and trying to hit on Calleigh? Or Horatio trying to have a conversation with Hodges in the Las Vegas lab? Or imagine Grissom speaking with Sid in the New York ME office? I'd pay money to see that exchange.

More people to start watching The OC - It's good again people. Really good. Scout's honor.

30 Rock's sketches to be on Studio 60 - I've warmed up to Studio 60 and I really am looking forward to the second half of the season. It just took a while to find it's groove and I respect that. But the sketches? They suck. I think the only one I laughed at all season was the Santa Claus/To Catch a Predator spoof. But the sketches on 30 Rock are hilarious. Can you imagine how much better Studio 60 would be if it had funny sketches?

The Shield to come back in Januray... forget Dirt - I just got a screener for Dirt, and I do plan on covering it, but it doesn't look good. Ausiello even gave it "flop of the year" status. That does not bode well but I'll still have an "early look" post up by the end of the week. I wouldn't expect a positive review, but then again, you never know. I may love it. Here's what I do know: Vic Mackey kicks ass. I mean, c'mon, how cool is this promo?

Prison Break to just disappear - The first season was great, but that should have been it. The second go at it has been atrocious and it's gotten to the point where I can't suspend my disbelief for a whole hour. The show is just terrible!

Ditto that for American Idol - I absolutely hate that in a month's time, this will be the only show that people are talking about.

I think that's all I feel like ranting about. I could go on about my desire to see more McNulty when The Wire returns for its final season or my hopes that HBO execs pull their heads out of their asses and give Lucky Louie the second season it deserves, but I'll stop here because inadvertently I always end up unsatisfied with these lists due to the fact that I could go on forever.

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You know what seems to be blaring on your list.... how HBO is letting us down... And down... and down. I wish we could get our Deadwood Movies, I wish about Lucky Louie... the only thing that seems to be good is "Entoruage" and that just isn't enough to keep my HBO subscription.

December 20 2006 at 4:18 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

Couldn't agree more about Prison Break needing to go away. Even the first season didn't fully follow through on its premise. How many times do we see the full body tattoo and how many times was it actually utilized? Michael Scofield must have a terrible memory because so far the list of things he's used from his tattoo has been pretty short.

December 20 2006 at 4:11 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

Lucky Louie sucked. I know that single camera comedies are all the range, but I didn't care for the premise, the characters or the comedy. Talk about depressing.

I would love to see Sopranos end with a blockbuster ending that is intensely creative and believable. All a dream? Alter-ego of Kevin Finnerty? Or simply a good bloody traditional ending. Who knows. I can handle all of those if it were authentic and believable.

December 20 2006 at 3:31 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

Dude, Lucky Louis wasn't funny. Although I thought Louis CK's stand-up was good, the show just sucked. If cancelling that means The Wire gets season 5, so be it. (And I can't wait for the Return of McNulty either.)

December 20 2006 at 1:48 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

"But the sketches on 30 Rock are hilarious."

Um, we have hardly seen any sketches on 30 Rock (I have been watching the show from day one). And I think that's helping the show, they just refer to the sketches, and never show them. The only one they showed was the one where Tracy was dressed up as a cook who kept throwing up.

-Agreed on Deadwood and The Shield. I'm still disappointed that Deadwood was cancelled, and I have a strong feeling that the 2 movies will never be made.

-I sort of disagree on the "more McNulty" part. Sure, the character is brilliant, played wonderfully by Dominic West, but I didn't miss the character that much during season 4. A HUGE testament to the writers that they can actually move away from the "main character" (I use the term loosely) and still be better than ever. It seems like McNulty will be the main character in season 5 though.

December 20 2006 at 1:31 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
cara gustman

ED DVD collection has my vote!
When purchased please let us all know so that I can run out and buy it!!

December 20 2006 at 1:23 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

I love the CSI movie idea. I too wish we could see some more crossovers in the CSI universe... it would be hilarious to see some of the character interactions.

December 20 2006 at 12:39 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Ryan S.

I really like your CSI movie idea. That could be pretty good I think, or perhaps a few more crossover episodes. Law and Order does it, CSI should too (yes i know that CSI did it to launch CSI Miami and CSI NY, but that is only 2 examples.)

December 20 2006 at 12:02 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Akbar Fazil

Ive actually made my own Nogasake for years (I actually enjoy combining all kinds of liquor with egg nog every year)

I would have to say that either the taste just doesn't work for you or your eggnog or sake was inferior. For that combination to work (imo) you need quality ingredients.

December 20 2006 at 11:49 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

Prison break does need to end. This whole season has felt like an exercise in stretching to fill time. And I know everyone but me loves 24, but Wentworth Miller's low talking throaty suspenseful serious talking voice is just as annoying as Kiefer's Jack Bauer voice. I think this phenomenon started with Stephen Baldwin in the Usual Suspects and has been catching on ever since.

December 20 2006 at 11:33 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

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