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July 1, 2015

TV's Top 5!: Seinfeld alums need jobs too

by Elizabeth Chan, posted Feb 6th 2007 2:00PM

Jason Alexander on Everybody Hates ChrisThis is a public service announcement to Jason Alexander.

Life after Seinfeld has been really tough for you has it? I mean not as tough as Michael Richards who should follow Isaiah Washington into "pottymouth rehab", but you haven't exactly parlayed your existence into other gigs like Julia Louis-Dreyfus in The New Adventures of Old Christine. Our enthusiasm for the dimwitted loveable man has been curbed towards Larry David, who helped you become a star. Even the virtually unknown Seinfeld writer Spike Feresten has been able to translate writing his soup nazi episode into his own talk show.

All you have to work with is your short lived marriage to Britney Spears. Oh wait. That wasn't you either.

Ok. So you have nothing. But please don't do this anymore. There is no reason to grab your crotch in your best Michael Jackson impression. There is no reason to pretend to play the cheap acoustic guitar behind an electric guitar beat. We know you can't play. You need to drop your inner Matisyahu and play some other roles.

I admit, Everybody Hates Chris is a good show, and I didn't catch last night's episode but Heroes and 24 was on, and my DVR's hands were full, even still... I'm ready to see you play a serial killer in a horror flick. You've got that creepy old man thing down, its apparent in the clip. You should be a front runner for any of that type casting.
Tell your people to call my people and we can throw around some ideas.

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