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When will the Oscars learn?

by Paul Goebel, posted Feb 26th 2007 7:02PM

Coppola, Lucas, and SpielbergNo matter what I do to make my Oscar viewing experience bearable (parties, alcohol, hookers) I always end up wanting to put a gun in my mouth by hour two.

First, let me say that Ellen DeGeneres was very funny and did a great job hosting. Also the song by Will Ferrell, Jack Black and John C Reilly was the funniest thing I've seen in a while.

Now let me ask you this...how stupid were those dancers?

I guess the producers couldn't afford Cirque du Soleil, and Mummenshanz was booked. Was it really worth the time and money spent to see a group of dancers make shadow puppets? Every year, the Oscars take themselves more seriously while at the same time being more ridiculous.

How about the new Three Stooges: Spielberg, Lucas and Coppola? Who's great idea was it to have the men behind 1941, Jack and Howard the Duck do a comedy routine? The funniest part was when Spielberg stole Moe Howard's line, "Spread out."

Lastly, I understand that the movie business is head over heels in love with itself, but do we really need so many tributes? Especially a tribute to a bunch of movies that have nothing to do with each other? Who produced that segment, George Costanza?

When will the Oscars learn that all we really want to see are the major categories, a funny host and the parade of dead people?

On the bright side, I hear that Al Gore and Leo DiCaprio are working on a new "buddy cop" movie.

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Alison Hunt

I think that your statement as far as the shadow puppets were concerned were rude and ungrounded. Some of those people that performed as shadow puppets have worked their entire lives to make a career out of it. Take for instance one of the shadow puppets herself. Her name is Molly Gawler, she is from Belgrade, Maine and attended Maine Central Institute where she was one of the top students in our graduating class as well as a ballet dancer. She worked hard to get where she is today, and negative comments from the peanut gallery do not instill confidence. That was her lifes dream and she achieved it. Besides I found it all very ammusing.

March 26 2007 at 9:59 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
VSJ

I agree: the dancers were great, do away with the singing, limit to one lifetime achievement, get rid of the montages, eliminate the factoids each time someone wins an award, televise only the major awards, dump the backstage "cam". Now, for few new suggestions:

1. Have more than 1 host.
2. Limit the show to no more than 2 hours.
3. Limit acceptance speeches to 5 seconds, no need to get up on stage just stand up and accept the award.
4. Or, have all of the nominees stand up on stage at the same time and the one who wins steps forward and just says, "THANK YOU", rather than kissing everybody, wasting time walking to the stage, only to rattle off a bunch of names that do not mean anything to the viewing audience.
5. Movies nominated for one particular category cannot be nominated for another - only one cat. per movie.
6. Finally, insert Simon, Paula, and Randy and let the audience decide who should win....

February 28 2007 at 12:21 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Scott

I strongly disagree. The shadow dancers were a little silly, but short and inoffensive. The Farrel/Black song was stupid and appealed to 12-year-olds. Lucas, Coppola, and Spielberg sharing the stage together was an entertaining and historic moment--these 3 are among the most talented and successful film directors on the planet, and seeing them relaxed with each other as friends was a Hollywood moment the average person never gets to see. As far as the montages go, I'm a fan of them--the editing is always exceptional--but there are ALWAYS TOO MANY. Keep them, just don't try to do 5 or 6 each year.

Dump the singing, though. I could definitely do without that (and I did, courtesy of my TiVo). And put a few bigger categories back into the first hour of the show! I don't mind all the technical awards, but they need to be broken up with the supporting actor & actress just to get some star power up there.

February 27 2007 at 12:37 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Karen

The shaddow dancers were great and went perfect with the sound effects choir. I thought it tied together well.

I did fall asleep half way through...but I WANTED to see more shaddow dancers. :)

February 27 2007 at 5:50 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Dan German

The long walk ons are what got me. Trim those and the show would be 90 minutes.

February 27 2007 at 1:07 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Amber

I really liked the Oscars this year and enjoyed the puppet dancers. It was original and different. If anyone didn't like it and all they can do is put it down then I'm sure they think they can do much better. I doubt putting something together is not easy. But hey, leave it to an American to complain over something like that.

February 26 2007 at 10:34 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
James

Ellen was fine. Everything was twice as long as it should have been. Film tributes are fine, but half as many and half as long and I would have been to bed at a decent time and not such a b**ch at work today.

February 26 2007 at 10:32 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Erica

The dancers were great, hater.

February 26 2007 at 10:04 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
thegoddesskiara

If you don't like the Oscars don't watch it. How hard is that? I actually enjoyed the Oscars this year and i like the Lifetime Achievement award too.

February 26 2007 at 8:42 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
bgdc

1. Do away with ALL singing/dancing
2. Nix the tributes/montages
3. Remove the humanitarian award - show it with the technical awards
4. Lifetime achievement - see number 3
5. Delete the singing of the silly nominated songs

Stop hiring people who are afraid to offend the movie industry weanies. Honestly, they're performing a child's game: make believe. Get a host who will skewer them and never let them forget they are well paid dancing monkeys. Everytime they hire a host who does mock the monkeys, the monkeys demand a new zookeeper who will pet them and love them (Ellen, Billy asskisser Crystal).

February 26 2007 at 8:12 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

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