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July 28, 2014

The AmeriCone Dream is not Colbert-worthy

by Annie Wu, posted Mar 15th 2007 11:22AM
AmeriCone DreamEver since Ben & Jerry's came out with Stephen Colbert's AmeriCone Dream flavor ice cream, I've been on a frantic search for a pint. Even with the aid of the No Fact Zone blog's map, my quest has been fruitless... until today. Around noon, I got a panicked phone call from my friend, who told me that I needed to go to a nearby cafe as soon as possible because the dessert freezer was stocked with pints and pints of AmeriCone Dream. Of course, I picked one up as soon as possible and rushed it home. I had been waiting for this moment all my life (by "all my life", I mean "for the last few weeks") and I finally -- finally -- had a pint of the coveted ice cream. Waiting for my spoon. Waiting to turn into melty soup in my tummy.

Well, I've had a bit and, with great sadness, I am here to report that... I'm actually a little disappointed. Actually, I think this is the first time I haven't felt an overwhelming urge to polish off an entire pint of Ben & Jerry's in one sitting.

Although the fudge-covered waffle cone bits and caramel swirls in creamy vanilla were fine and dandy, it didn't pack enough pizazz to be a Colbert-related item. Don't even get me started on the lack of patriotic razzmatazz. Oh, you do want me to get started? Fine, I will. I want strawberry swirls and blueberry bits in vanilla. Now that sounds like a Stephen Colbert ice cream, a dessert that America can be proud of. Throw in some apple pie chunks and freshly deep-fried bald eagle meat and it'd be super-American. But I understand that may be asking for a bit much.

Other tribute pints (as I like to call them) seem to make more sense... Vermonty Python has fudge cows, Phish Food has chocolate fish, Cherry Garcia has bits of hash. AmeriCone Dream just seems to be another flavor that Ben & Jerry's happened to be kicking around and decided to name after Colbert. I guess since the cool thing to do nowadays is to make references to Colbert in various foods and sports teams and comic books and songs, so Ben & Jerry's decided to get a piece of the action. Did Ben & Jerry's really want to celebrate everyone's favorite faux right-winger or just hop on the Colbert bandwagon? I'm starting to feel like it's the latter, now that I've actually tasted the dessert. Only the packaging is Colbert-esque, and that's mainly because his name and face are on the container.

As an ice cream, AmeriCone Dream is okay... As a Colbert salute, I find it to be a little weak. I think I'm going to ponder this a little more while I stuff my face with the rest of my pint. Delcious fatty milk product is delicious fatty milk product, right?

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JC Baron

I guess it is up to me to explain this joke to you. Vanilla: the fact that Colbert's character is supposed to be an uptight white man

Fudge: fudging the truth, lying, truthiness

Waffle: to waffle, or waffling, which is to speak evasively or deceptively. This term is often used to describe the speech of politicians.

Caramel: (okay, a bit of a stretch, here, but perhaps it means Colbert is tough as nails on the outside, but is actually gooey and softhearted on the inside? Or perhaps just because caramel tastes good?)

May 11 2007 at 4:00 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
r.r.r.

i like the waffle piece and the caramel too. i think the strawberry/blueberry would of been silly. too silly. it sucks that you were disappointed though. Boo.

March 15 2007 at 11:32 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
VSJ

Sorry to read that you were disappointed, the ingredients sound very appealing!

March 15 2007 at 9:57 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Jon88

Didn't Haagen-Dazs already do a waffle cone/caramel flavor? And we're agreed on the blueberry/strawberry.

Has anybody found the Creme Brulee? It's the one new flavor I haven't seen yet. (People with low tolerance for lumps of sugar might want to avoid Cinnamon Buns.)

March 15 2007 at 4:02 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Mandy

Now that Ben & Jerry's is owned by Unilever I'd guess potential profit means a lot more than figuring out the best way to make an ice cream Colbert-worthy. Unilver probably is satisfied that "AmeriCone" is catchy enough and that putting chocolate-covered cones in it is more profitable than using strawberries and blueberries.

March 15 2007 at 2:00 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
David

I said this WEEKS ago!

I even said they should have but in strawberry and blueberry to make it red white and blue and people shot me down. The ice cream sounds find, but not good enough for $4 a pint.

March 15 2007 at 1:30 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Erica

Wow, are you and my hubby some how on the same wave link, or are you possibly related? Either way, the description of adding strawberries and blueberries, and just that "extra" something else was exactly what he said the ice cream need to be Colbert worthy. Freaky.... :)

March 15 2007 at 12:41 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
DB Ferguson

Hey! I like it a lot! Lots of caramel, lots of huge waffle cone pieces. Now, it's not my *favorite* Ben & Jerry's (that would be Cherry Garcia) or even my second favorite (that would be the new Willie Nelson' Country Peach Cobbler flavor - dear God, that stuff is good), but IMHO it is Colbert-worthy.

And you make jumping on the Colbert bandwagon sound so cheap and tawdry, instead of ... well, honoring the glory that is Stephen Colbert, all praise and glory to His name, peace be upon Him. I'm all for people jumping on the bandwagon, mostly because it gives me more to blog about.

p.s. - You *are* going to e-mail me the link to where you bought this for my map, right? (db (at@) nofactzone.net)

March 15 2007 at 11:46 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

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