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Scrubs: My Cold Shower
by Joel Keller, posted May 4th 2007 12:21AM
(S06E19) Notgettingany Syndrome is an affliction that affects millions of American men, and it seems to run rampant at Sacred Heart, doesn't it? Carla's still not feelin' it months after having a baby, so Turk goes without. The Todd always talks a good game, but no one's getting into his banana hammock. Kelso can't find any interesting Asian massage therapists to befriend; he's so desperate, he's thinking of actually having sex with his wife. And, J.D.... Well, we all know what's going on with J.D.What does all this mean? Lots of cold showers. A lot of thinking about your aunt's arm fat. And it also means we've found one of the funniest episodes of the season.
This had a lot of the old-style Scrubs feel. Lots of fantasy sequences (everyone had one... more on this in a second); a mysterious medical case; Cox berating someone; Elliot saying "frick" a lot. Yes, there was a little bit of drama, mostly in the form of J.D.'s lamenting what he could have had with Elliot, but even that was treated with a bit of a light touch, as he sublimated those desires by trying to do more than "mackin'" with Elliot's sorority sister Melody.
OK, let's address this whole J.D. thing. Was I the only one who rolled my eyes at the end of the episode when J.D.'s internal monologue said "It should have been me"? Jeez alou, I thought we settled this whole J.D./Elliot issue a year or two ago. I never wanted to see them become one of those on-again-off-again Ross-and-Rachel torture-fests, but it seems like it might actually be moving in that direction. Heck, even the show's writers acknowledge what's going on; Carla says that J.D. and Elliot are like Ross and Rachel on Friends, and Cox agrees, though he thinks J.D. is more like Rachel. I think they did a better Ross and Rachel joke a few years ago:Janitor to J.D.: I mean, you guys aren't exactly Ross and Rachel.
J.D.: Who?
Janitor: You know... Dr. Ross and Rachel from bookkeeping.
His attempts at going to "Boobtown" with Melody weren't even that inspired, though I liked his snow-globe mermaid fantasy, starring "GoaTurk" (a long way to go for a "My Baaaad" joke, but what the hell, right?). Like last week, Kerri Russell's presence as Melody didn't do much for me comedy-wise. There have been a few female guest stars who have been able to slide easily into the Scrubs vibe; heck, I was disappointed that Heather Graham never joined the cast permanently, she fit in so well. But Russell just didn't really look comfortable in the role, even when she was talking about her all-girl threesome (though I liked the "Damn!" chain that Turk started. Also funny was J.D. asking, "Was it two girls and a guy or was it a devil's threesome?").For the second week in a row, the writers didn't give Neil Flynn a whole heck of a lot to do. The "God is watching" joke was good -- "Who is this God guy?" -- but not carried far enough. And the only reason why he was fixing the sprinklers was to accidentally give the boys a cold shower in the ICU.
Oh, and seniors with syphilis? Ewww... Though Elliot's lame attempt to explain the sickness to the two unrelated patients was a little funny, especially when she handed the responsibility to a scared young intern. Wow. Six years ago, that would have been her. The circle is complete.
Another note: Is Jordan just randomly crazy now? She used to be more of a cunning kind of crazy. Now she's asking strangers to smell her Botoxed underarms and tossing bottles at The Todd (OK, maybe that wasn't so crazy, but still...).
You knew that Keith giving Elliot the opportunity to do his proposal her way was like giving a drunken college kid a no-fee Citibank Visa, didn't you? At least it got us the chance to hear her "frick-a-thon" as Keith tried to jam the undersized ring on her finger. Elliot's pretty skinny; what kind of tiny, Cracker Jack box ring did Keith get that couldn't even fit on her finger?
The best part about that subplot, of course, was every guy's fantasy about what being married to Elliot would be like. Funniest? Cox and the butcher knife? Sexiest? Preppie Turk having sex with a maid that looked suspiciously like Carla (What am I thinking? It was Carla and Elliot together. Duh. "It would be so much easier that way," is how Carla described it). Most disappointing? Elliot asking Janitor if they pigeonholed their kids and not seeing actual pigeons. Given Janitor's history of mass taxidermy, that would have been a funny, in-character joke.
Of course, the sweetest one was J.D. and Elliot. I swear, I really hope they don't go there. We know Kim and the Dorian fetus are still hanging around, and as we found out earlier this week, the season -- and maybe the series
-- might end on a bit of a cliffhanger. Let's hope that cliffhanger has more to do with J.D. moving on with Kim or someone else than taking yet another shot at Elliot.Like I said, pretty funny episode. I'll give it a 6.
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