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April 23, 2014

Adam Finley: Adam's kooky lyric game

by Julia Ward, posted Sep 10th 2007 1:04PM
Today, Monday September 10, 2007, TV Squad is remembering blogger Adam Finley who passed away tragically late last week. All front page posts will be staff picks of Adam's writing through the years.

Like most brilliant people before him, Adam was a Grade A goofball. His profound love for Adult Swim and smart comedy are a testament to that, but forget writing about other people's funny ha-ha expressions, Adam had plenty of his own funny ha-ha to go around. Who the hell else rewrites the lyrics to The Facts of Life by saying, "In conclusion, the result is the truth of all existence?" So, you know, take some time this week to celebrate Adam by getting your goofy on. Watch some Robot Chicken, use your Cartman voice or talk to some cans. Do what you got to do, but feel the joy and remember Adam.

Originally published February 26, 2007.


Music NotesOkay, so I was in the mood to create another fun TV game for y'all like I did with my "TV opposites" game, so here it is.

Below you will find altered lyric samples from TV themes that more or less mean the same thing as the original lyrics. For example, if I wrote:

One takes that which is affirmative, and also that which is negative
and puts these two opposing forces together
in conclusion, the result is the truth of all existence

then you should deduce that this is simply an overwrought way of saying:

You take the good, you take the bad
you take 'em both, and there you have
the Facts of Life

So the answer would be: The Facts of Life (you don't have to tell me the actual lyrics, just the name of the show).

Got it? Okay, good. Now let's do it:

I want to see your grin once more
sobbing takes too much time, so stop doing it
we're not even close to the finale
the greatest part will commence soon

***

A lot of personal effort must be exerted to carve your niche in life
but a respite from your concerns would probably be beneficial
it would be nice to escape, wouldn't it?

***

The rotation of this planet
is not dependent on a singular rhythm device
whatever works for you may not always work for someone else

***

A stain on your expensive dishes
was never much of a concern
and tossing your outer wear on the floor
never resulted in an angry look from anyone

***

My mother birthed me in the largest city in Pennsylvania
I also grew up there
much of my time was spent in the school yard
having fun
and playing a game invented by James Naismith

***

Nobody go to sleep just yet
instead, watch the final animated program of the evening
this show is now on
with creatures who expel both solid and liquid waste

Okay, you guys are pretty sharp, so you'll probably guess these rather quickly. Come up with some of your own and stick them in the comments. Happy solving.

UPDATE: Looks like I was right, you guys guessed them already. Feel free to keep coming up with some of your own in the comments. Here's the answers: Growing Pains, Cheers, Diff'rent Strokes, Mr. Belvedere, Fresh Prince of Bel Air, and TV Funhouse.

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