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October 9, 2015

Adam Finley: Ryan Seacrest to host Emmys

by Richard Keller, posted Sep 10th 2007 12:01PM
Today, Monday September 10, 2007, TV Squad is remembering blogger Adam Finley who passed away tragically late last week. All front page posts will be staff picks of Adam's writing through the years.

One of the things that Adam was so good at was taking a simple little blurb about some television personality or another and making up a little 'theater of the mind' play for the audience to laugh about. One of the last times he did this was back in August when he reported on Ryan Seacrest (who is most likely attempting to take over the world) becoming host of this year's Emmys. Adam, we will miss you.

Originally published on August 20, 2007.

ryan seacrestFOX announced today that Ryan Seacrest will be hosting the 59th Emmy Awards on FOX September 16 at 8:00 p.m. This news comes in the wake of the announcement that Seacrest will also be hosting the Super Bowl.

I have no idea if this is a good idea or not, as I don't watch American Idol, E! News, Captain Seacrest's Pirate Ship Hootenanny, or whatever the hell other series he's featured on. Still, isn't the typical rule for awards shows to have some kind of comedian hosting them?

The only explanation I can come up with is that Ryan Seacrest is very, very persuasive, and has cajoled his way into these hosting gigs, despite not being the best choice. If you doubt me, check out this transcript from the security tape at a hospital in Los Angeles:

Doctor: This patient is losing a lot of blood! We have to get him into surgery!

Seacrest: He sure is. I'll take over now.

Doctor: Who are you?

Seacrest: I'm Ryan Seacrest. Now we need to yell at the man's blood to scare it back inside his body.

Doctor: Get the hell out of here!

Seacrest: I don't think you understand. I'm Ryan Seacrest.

Doctor: Are you a doctor?

Seacrest: Stop screwing around, damn it! I need three paper cups and a Herb Alpert album if this man is going to have his baby before sunrise!

Doctor: Security!

Seacrest: You called?

Doctor: What?

Seacrest: That's right, I'm also security. Would you like me removed?

Doctor: The patient is dead.

Seacrest: Well, we tried.

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