Survivor Micronesia: I Should Be Carried on the Chariot-Type Thing!

(S16E03)

Gallery: Survivor Micronesia: I Should Be Carried on the Chariot-Type Thing!

Now, before I get really started here, let me tell you straight-up point blank no holds barred -- I am not a happy camper. So, if you detect a snarling and surly undertone to my writing, you're very astute and extremely accurate. Heck, I think I might be gnashing my teeth a bit, or something to that effect. Will gnashing my teeth do any permanent damage? I guess I should stop that.

For the first time this season, they had a separate rewards challenge and brutal one at that. They got to don war paint and go to battle. Although I thought one of the fan girls looked more like an evil mime than a warrior, in the end the make-up didn't matter. In a torrential downpour while in the water, the tribes had to get five canvas bags into their end zone.

I think Eric from the fans tribe went way too far when he first deliberately bonked Eliza hard on the head with one of the heavy bags just to be mean. Then he took Amanda right over his head and slammed her into the water! Gack! What is with this kid? James looked almost like a superhero to the rescue when he saw Eric dump Amanda and I think that may have been the impetus of the favorites' win.

I liked the idea of the catalog for choosing three reward items. I know they've used that sort of thing before but it gives the tribes more of a chance to get what they think they need the most. I notice both tribes chose shelter. With that monsoon about to arrive, it was definitely a wise choice.

I think the favorites were probably wise in sending Kathy once again to Exile Island. Why give two separate members of the opposing tribe a chance at the hidden idol? For all they know, she might have it already. I suppose Cirie might have an inkling whether Kathy has the idol or not, but I don't think she can be sure unless she herself has it. Why they sent Ami to accompany her, I don't have a clue.

Now it's time for me to get my surliness on.

I always enjoyed Cirie Fields. She's a local gal out of Jersey City, she really went so far in her own season coming in as quite the underdog city girl. She always seemed like someone I would even choose as a friend kind of thing.

But then ... I adore Yau-Man Chan. He's so much fun to watch, he's an intelligent guy, and he also proved his mettle in his own season getting well beyond so many on the show. If I had to choose between Yau-Man and Cirie, I'd go for the Yau-Man every time. He's more of a player, doesn't depend as much on others.

Cirie, on the other hand, has somehow gotten the impression this season that she's the Queen and should be pampered by all of the others for her vote. How did this all come about? Jonathan Penner never thrilled me, but he called this one so right. Are they blind? Cirie has it in her head that Yau-Man is one of the biggest liars ever on Survivor and I'm just not seeing where she gets that from. I know it stems from him having hidden idols in his season, but how is that anything other than good game-playing?

The immunity challenge should have been stacked up in favor of the favorites. I noticed they had their two bulkiest guys (James and Jonathan) holding the rope along with Cirie and Amanda (Cirie's pretty substantial and Amanda is athletic). The fans only had one bulky guy (Joel) along with three relative lightweights. But what did the favorites in was that the fans made more "hoops" thus making their net heavier until they lost it.

Then all the scheming started. I just can't figure out what spell Cirie has cast over them all. It was pitiful seeing Ozzy actually begging her to change her mind and vote out Eliza. Jonathan has always wanted Parvati out, so I don't really hold any shock over him pushing that idea. Eliza is the weakest physical link on the tribe right now with it being a tribal game until the merge. But it's like Cirie has all the control. I'm befuddled, I tell you.

The Tribal Council was more rowdy than most and I think it's likely that both Cirie and Jonathan may have put targets on their backs. Oh, wait. Cirie has magical powers. Okay, Jonathan put a target on his own back, that is.

Jonathan and Yau-Man voted for Parvati, Ami voted for Cirie (and I respect her so much more tor that!), and the rest all voted Yau-Man out.

Cirie Fields is off of my Christmas card list.