(S03E08) After a surprisingly Jackson Publick heavy run, we finally got another Doc Hammer solo with this episode (the first was "The Buddy System"). Apparently, the first half of the season just worked out to be a lot of Publick episodes and we'll be getting a lot more Doc Hammer scripts in upcoming episodes. Right on, right on.

This episode felt more like a Venture Bros. episode than the backstory-tastic stuff that has been dominating this season. Many hilarious moments, beautiful character interactions and gross-out moments were had.

Man, they're really killing it with the crash intros, aren't they? I know it's done only to maximize time and pack each episode with more goodness, but I must admit, I miss the old opening sequence.

In this episode, we were introduced to one of The Monarch's new assigned arches, Dr. Dugong, who actually kind of looked like the product of a saucy affair between a naked mole rat and a crippled manatee. We had briefly seen a photo of him in the Guild of Calamitous Intent Facebook, next to Dr. Tara Quymn's page ("Home Is Where The Hate Is"). Anyway, we didn't get to learn much about the poor, deformed fellow because The Monarch killed him. Whoops. The only way he gets excited about any of his assigned protagonists is if he pretends they're Dr. Venture, and that just sends him into a murderous rage. Dr. Dugong's death led to a major professional argument between Dr. Mrs. The Monarch and her man.

Meanwhile, on the Venture compound, Hank chilled with his new -- and possible first -- real friend, Dermott. The boys started their own band, with the help of HELPeR's newfound drum machine capabilities. I have never missed my old, crappy Casio keyboard so much. Dean contributed by covering the band in his Venture family publication. That kid needs to accept his own advice column wisdom and make his move on Triana. The advice-seeker, Mr. G. Viceroy, must have kicked his crush into high gear after copping an accidental feel in "I Know Why The Caged Bird Kills". #21's alias also reminded me how fantastic it would be for him to get bored enough to take on a solo-arching effort again. Jet Boy and Jet Girl's brief, brief run was amazing, and I'm sure #21 has some great ideas for his Viceroy persona.

We didn't get any action from Brock or Dr. Venture, as both of them were attending the Science Now convention. Brock was passed out with a pile of hot and desperate ladies, and Dr. Venture was passed out with his new Boom Broom vacuum cleaner. Not quite as hot. The Monarch took advantage of their absence by f*cking up an empty Venture compound with #21 and #24. That wavy flashback effect was brilliant. It was hilarious enough to make me forgive that total tease of a backstory opportunity. Those bastards.

Anyway, The Monarch's juvenile attack did not count on the presence of the Venture boys and Dermott. Dean walked in on The Monarch getting it on with GUARDO after seeing Dr. Venture's face flash on the screen. Easily one of the most disturbing moments in the history of the show. Please note I didn't even flinch when King Gorilla dragged an unconscious Monarch into his prison cell for an intimate moment ("Powerless in The Face of Death"). Actually, I totally wanted to use a picture from this moment as the image for this post, but I was worried it would freak out hapless casual readers just skimming through the front page. Does The Monarch have some crazy, psychologically screwed crush on Dr. Venture or is he just really into the idea of sexual humiliation? It's probably best if I just stop thinking about this and concentrate on the fantastic reverse psychology The Monarch used to keep Dean from tattling. Also, I'm both amused and worried to see Dean willingly wearing his speedsuit now. He's definitely becoming more and more like his father, despite all that repressed anger towards the man. At least he looks good in that onesie -- I mean, speedsuit.

Hank and Dermott, on the other hand, got chased down by #21 and #24, and gave us another "Super run away!", which, at this rate, will turn up more than "Go Team Venture!" this season. More interactions between the henchmen and the Venture boys in future episodes, please. That whole exchange between #21 and Hank was hysterical, and there's a whole new world of possibilities now that #21 has convinced Hank that he cannot die. And am I the only one that thought Dermott's attempt to give #24 his Earth germs was animated in a strangely anime-like fashion? I was waiting for a giant sweatdrop to appear on someone's forehead. It is also clear that Dermott really is Brock's long lost son, thanks to two references in this episode (not including the fact that he'd think of putting a lighter in his ass as defense). I was rather hesitant to accept this after "The Buddy System", because I thought not stating it directly meant there was something sneaky going on in the script. I'm one of those people that fly by the "no onscreen body, no death" rule for TV shows.

Dr. Mrs. The Monarch had to pick up The Monarch and the henchmen from the compound, after being alerted by her Murderous Moppets (or the Pupa Twins, I guess). Those guys are getting creepier and creepier with each episode. Their weird, squat new costumes are not helping the situation.

Tim-Tom: We could just... close our eyes.
Kevin: Yeah, and just promise not to peek.
Tim-Tom: At your body.
Kevin: At your naked body.

And that's considered sweet, compared to their conversation about Dr. Mrs. The Monarch's clean, white panties. Ugh. However, I liked how they seemed just as in-the-dark about The Monarch's hatred of Dr. Venture as the viewers. We've got to find out eventually. Please don't leave us hanging until Season Four, guys.

Dr. Mrs. The Monarch got back into her old Dr. Girlfriend costume, and then showed us all that she is fully capable of running this operation on her own. I've gotta say, I missed that outfit. Her Dr. Mrs. The Monarch number is kind of distracting... for two reasons.

The episode ended with a few developments that have major potential. First of all, Hank definitely thinks he's immortal now. Is this going to cause extra inconvenience for Dr. Venture, having to whip up more clones, or are there more serious troubles ahead? Either way, I hope we get to see The Bat try to use an umbrella as a parachute again. Secondly, The Monarch is finally going to officially arch Dr. Venture, but this time it's Jonas, Jr. on Spider Skull Island. There's also Ned! Everyone hearts that human callous.

Also, it's worth pointing out that this episode only used three actors: Jackson Publick, Doc Hammer and Mike Sinterniklaas. Quite impressive, considering they certainly didn't skimp on the characters.

Shirt of the Week: Dr. Girlfriend. After the "Dean!" shirt from a few weeks ago and the re-appearance of GUARDO this episode, I was worried they were going to release an "Oh no! it's GUARDO!" shirt (the possibility of both shirts as lame merchandise options were jokingly referenced in DVD commentary). However, the star of this episode was not GUARDO, but Dr. Mrs. The Monarch, taking charge and remaining sexy while doing so. I like the mod take on this shirt, the Blur-esque font along the bottom and the fact that the circles behind her make me think of Doc Hammer's saints. That said, I'm a little on the fence about whether or not I'll get this, simply because I'm suffering from an overload of both B&W shirts and 60s spy babe imagery in my life. On the other hand, it's a B&W shirt with 60s spy babe imagery, so I feel a hole burning through my wallet/PayPal account.