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September 2, 2015

Super Skank Wednesday: The Greatness of Mr. Boston

by Kristin Sample, posted Jul 23rd 2008 11:05AM
Mr. BostonWelcome to Super Skank Wednesday. This is where I celebrate the awesomely skanky people on the following shows: I Love Money, Charm School, New York Goes to Hollywood, and The Surreal Life. Basically, I'll discuss the skankalicious shows that make VH1 the network it is today.

Today, we'll pay homage the star of I Love Money: Mr. Boston. Who knew this awkward guy from Bean Town would have hotties like Megan Hausermann saying "He's growing on me" and tough guys like White Boy wrapped around his finger.

Mr. Boston tries to get another massage. I thought the other skanks and manks on I Love Money might eat the nerdy kid from I Love New York alive. I mean, come on. The guy's name is ridiculous. When I think of guys from Boston, I think of rough-and-tough guys who will knock someone out at a Red Sox game. I don't think of some lanky blonde dude who gets his ass kicked by some skinny punk named "Chance." I have to agree with Megan "the Boy Toy Troublemaker" Hausermann though. He kind of grows on you. So let's talk about why.

1. He's smart.
2. He always lets us in on his strategies.
3. No one can resist "the Boston charm." (He needs to copyright that phrase.)

He's smart:

Yes, Mr. Boston (despite popular opinion) is indeed pretty clever. Boston has already shown us twice that he's a force to be reckoned with on I Love Money. First, he convinced White Boy let him on the green team. And WhiteBoy (and WhiteBoy's alliance) hate Mr. Boston and don't trust him. Yet Boston was able to woo them to side -- at least temporarily.

Megan is grossed out by Mr. Boston's scene. Second, there's this past week when Mr. Boston pretended to be sick to convince The Entertainer that he's not a threat. Boston made himself throw up so much that he gave himself a nose bleed. And The Entertainer (who is not really smart at all) bought it hook, line and sinker. Sidenote: I loved when Heat body slammed Mr. Boston on the beach. If he wasn't sick, Boston probably had a broken rib or two after that.

He always lets us in on his strategy.

Whether Mr. B is explaining how he's got WhiteBoy's loyalty because of Jewish solidarity or figuring out that some of the other skanks have hidden his bed, he is always letting the viewers know what's up. I think VH1 should just let him narrate the whole darn show.

No one can resist the Boston Charm:

Mr. Boston in a bikiniMuch to the chagrin of the other manks in the I Love Money house, Mr. Boston seems to be a hit with the ladies. He already got a sensual massage from Brandi C. and Megan. He got Toastee to agree to share her bed with him. And he hooked up with Pumkin prior to the show.

And just wait till they kiss him. New York was orgasmic every time they locked lips on her show. A scary thought, I know. This is the same woman who liked The Entertainer licking her toes. I'm still suspicious of how good some sugar from Mr. B really is. I guess we'll have to wait and see Mr. Boston gets really lucky this summer. (I wonder if he brought his STD results.)

Maybe the skanks just a appreciate a guy who isn't afraid to access his feminine side. (See that picture to the left.)

So what do you think? Do you love Mr. Boston as much as I do? I will go so far as to say that Mr. Boston should get his own show. There were rumors awhile back that he wanted a solo gig with VH1 but it was just "let's follow around Mr. Boston." That's not interesting enough. It needs to be a dating show. Would you tune in to I Love Boston? Apparently the sad individual who made this video would...

Now I love Mr. Boston. But that was just creepy.

Happy Super Skank Wednesday! (By the way SSW readers, I've noticed that some people are leaving awesome comments but forgetting to activate them. Don't forget to do that. Your infinite wisdom won't show up on the site otherwise. Thanks!)

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rick cokely

I really love me some Mr. Boston. This weeks episode was exactly what I love about him. The Entertainer thought by taking Boston on the trip was going to somehow "get into his head" but he never got that chance because Boston saw it coming. The Entertainer didn't get into his head and didn't get him booted off, so Mr. B wins hands down.

I have to admit that I saw through his act even before he said he was faking it, but I knew the Entertainer wouldn't. And seriously, getting rid of that chick was a stupid move when the only person that was a serious threat (especially to Entertainer) was Boston. But then again, he really should have put up the White Boy group and got rid of one of them, since they are physically the strongest and any break up of that alliance would cause havok for the two remaining players.

Oh well, I guess that is why The Entertainer still lives at home with his mom.

July 24 2008 at 1:14 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Bx Burlesque

I think Boston makes for entertaining TV, but 1) he blew most of the points that Heather earned me on my fantasy team, and 2) I think he's a delusional asshat. Maybe because I find him a bit creepy, I read a lot of his commentary explaining what he claims as strategy to be totally untrue, attempts to try to seem cool-n-clever. For example, when he said that he was faking being sick, I assumed he was lying, making up a story to explain what might have made him look weak to audiences as a deliberate attempt to look weak to his opponents. I also think Megan, who is not across-the-board stupid and is damn good at manipulation, was playing him when she said that he was growing on her. She knows tossing him an occasional bone will keep him on her side with no effort, and as her success on Beauty and the Geek shows, a loyal nerd can be a useful tool in reality TV. The Entertainer, of all people, seems to have picked up on the hidden potential for mischief in both Boston (calling him smartand therefore potentially dangerous) and Megan (calling her manipulative, repeatedly), but opting to play the game based on personal reasons rather than actual strategy (and apparently forgetting his flashes of insight) was more what I expected from Parents'-Basement-Frank.

Okay, I think WAYYYYY too much about this show.

July 23 2008 at 8:03 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

Fungus also grows on you ... that doesn't mean it's a good thing.

Also you should add From G's to Gents to your SSW cuz that's another shake my head show.

July 23 2008 at 4:04 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
1 reply to ladytex's comment
Kristin Sample

I've never heard of that show. The title is reason enough for me to give it try. From Gs to Gents! Awesome.

July 23 2008 at 5:01 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

I love SSW! So awesome. Kristin how many points do you have so far in the fantasy game. I only made 29 points last week! Damn the man!

July 23 2008 at 3:52 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
1 reply to Melissa's comment
Kristin Sample

Thanks Mel!

I don't remember how many points I have. I think I only got like thirty or something low too. It told me I was in like 4,000th place. I should write them and say, "Don't you know who I am? I write Super Skank Wednesday!"

July 23 2008 at 5:00 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

How Mr. Boston could grow on anyone is beyond me... *sigh*

Colon Cleansing

July 23 2008 at 1:07 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
1 reply to Liz's comment
Kristin Sample

What a sign-off!

July 23 2008 at 4:59 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

I pitch the ultimate culmination of this celebreality evolution, The B&B connection. The show would be cameras following Busey as he followed Boston arround all day. As the casting special illustrated, when crazy like a fox meets crazy like a crazy you get comedy gold. Like in the special, the show would be Boston attempting to work the "Boston Charm"tm and Busey will come up and ruin any marginal chance he might have had.

As for the episode, I really hope faking being ill does not become an elimination trend. However, if Boston is constantly nominated I won't mind the fakery.

And the funniest quote ever.
Megan: Boston is kinda growing on me
Boston: I've got something growing right now *or something to that effect*

July 23 2008 at 12:20 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
1 reply to Adam's comment
Kristin Sample

I think the faking is stupid--but the idiots who fall for the faking, now that's amusing.

Awesome idea for a show, btw.

July 23 2008 at 4:58 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

I agree with you that his strategy is pretty good, cheesy ,but good.

I don't know about this weeks upcoming episode, he seems to getting some trouble headed his way.

July 23 2008 at 11:31 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
1 reply to Chris's comment
Kristin Sample

I know. He looked really upset in the previews. But it could be another rouse. (Is that how you spell that word?)

July 23 2008 at 4:57 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

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