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October 10, 2015

Project Runway: Double 0 Fashion

by Annie Wu, posted Sep 4th 2008 7:55AM
Project Runway(S05E08) I am so full of anger. And for that, I feel like I must apologize before jumping into my review, which will inevitably ooze frustration. This fury that has been building inside me throughout this season is about to set me alight. To put it bluntly, there is no one that I like in this pool of designers. There isn't even anyone that annoys me less than everybody else. However, I have been hanging on, because I love fashion and I love art and I kind of, sort of like seeing people getting chewed out on the runway. This episode nearly killed me, though, because nearly everyone was so blind to what was going on. Just about all of the designers are either too caught up on snarking behind each other's backs, complaining about nothing, or desperately trying to be a "character", and they've lost sight of their actual work.

Make me happy to be a Project Runway viewer again, designers! Save me from this loathing!

In this challenge, the designers were asked to make something for Diane Von Furstenberg's line, inspired by the 40s espionage look. The winning design would be sold to American Express cardholders. Joe pointed out that this is the exposure that Project Runway is all about. He says "potato", I say potahto"; he says "exposure", I say "increasingly involved shameless plugging."

Follow my seething commentary by checking out the designs on Bravo's website.

As one of my friends pointed out, Blayne's scope of pop culture relevance is extremely limited. He didn't know anything about the Beatles and he considers Mary-Kate Olsen a fashion icon? I pray that the rest of the country does not even begin to consider Blayne a proper representation of other arty 20-somethings. His outfit for this week was a real mess, but at least I kind of dug the high collar.

Jerell: This man caught a break this week because just about everyone's work was atrocious. Everyone in the room with me literally gasped out loud when Jerell's model stepped out. Should I talk about the awkward jacket? Or the strange use of the belt? Or the sloppiness of it all? No, I really shouldn't say anything, because I may burst into flames.

Joe: [ALMOST AUF'D] Once again, Joe and his magic facial hair really lucked out. His outfit was horrendous in more ways than one. He somehow made his model look like a gay space salmon. As a person that has struggled with color theory since the beginning of her art experience, even I was appalled by the use of a hot pink cummerbund and that strange red color.

Kenley: First of all, what in the hell was Kenley wearing on the runway? What poor Suess character had to die to keep her shoulders warm? Secondly, how is it that every time I see her, I manage to get more and more annoyed? Just when I think I've hit the ceiling, I break through and there's a whole new level. I thought Kenley's final creation was both a poor use of fabric and design and it blows my mind to think that it was part of the top two, topping Korto's design. It still baffles me that the judges would be so ignorant and quick to call it a "Shanghai" look just because there was a vague indication of a mandarin collar. I couldn't even look at that aspect because I was so distracted by the bizarre sleeves and use of pattern. Honestly, I still stand by what I shouted in the middle of our Project Runway viewing party during this episode, "Everything is poop."

Korto: This was one of the better pieces of the evening, which really isn't saying much, honestly. I think without that print, the outfit wouldn't have been quite as amazing, but I suppose choice of fabric is still a huge part of design. The strange jacket on top was poorly constructed though. It looked like an old bath mat and a bit of string.

Leanne: [WINNER] Bravo, Leanne, for not slacking off just because of previous immunity. The dress she made was fantastic, even if she had the same problem as Korto with the awkward jacket. If she had made it a little cleaner and cropped shorter, it would have been absolutely perfect.

Stella: [AUF'D] She really had it coming as soon as she sassed Tim about the judges in the workroom. I really don't understand the all the back-talking this season. It's like these designers have never seen Project Runway before. Stella's creation was pretty sad this time, taking a very sexy spy and turning her into a goth fleeing from Van Helsing. At least she didn't play up the melodrama when she left. Props for that, Stella.

Suede: Wow. What a mess. His first mistake was choosing that print. His second mistake was using that print straight across instead of turning it and allowing the pattern to head off in a non-horizontal direction. The biggest mistake was not listening to Tim Gunn when he pointed out that the skirt was too poofy, though. Again, it's like this season's designers have never watched an episode of PR in their life.

Terri: Oh, my goodness. I was already cringing when Terri tried on her own super-tight pants, but the photo on Bravo's website makes it look like her model has the most crippling case of camel toe in the history of wardrobe malfunctions. She's even a little hunched over, as if she's about to keel over from the pain and/or embarrassment. As many of the other designers mentioned during the episode, Terri's getting a little boring. She needs to mix things up if she wants to show off her abilities. While I get where she's coming from with the androgynous look, I certainly hope she knows that there's a way to do that without only working with pants and blazers.

Who should have been Auf'd?
Suede31 (12.7%)
Stella66 (26.9%)
Joe74 (30.2%)
Other8 (3.3%)
Send all designers home, start over66 (26.9%)

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Sam can't stand Suede. Sam wishes Suede had never been born. Bob Dole also hates Suede.

I wanted to scream when Joe became "tacky corporate shill guy." Ick.

September 06 2008 at 2:58 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

"What poor Suess character had to die to keep her shoulders warm?"

Okay, that line almost got me in trouble at work for laughing out loud in the library. That was good one! Thank you.

I agree that the over creations from the contestants have been pretty bad or just plain dull this year. Maybe the lack of time to create something really is playing havoc with them. I don't understand why on at least some of the challenges they can have two days to create something - and a little more money. Hello!? We're in a recession (I know Bush says it's just a "slowdown"), everything costs more and to have to get decent fabric and notions on just $100 or so is nuts. But anyway, the way things have gone I'm having a hard time imagining any of this people at Bryant Park.

September 05 2008 at 6:54 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

Hey, Annie, love your posts and read your Daily Show reviews religiously, but you might want to lighten up on Project Runway. If it really bothers you so much, maybe you should have Kona Gallagher or another person review it. I'm actually really enjoying this season, especially the drag ep, and even though the designers talk back and are, for the most part, very annoying, I still love it for just being PR. Honestly, I'm only saying this in your best interest, I'm getting the feeling that your head will explode by season's end. I don't even want to know how it'll be once PR moves to Lifetime.

September 04 2008 at 5:46 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

If the show is so completely horrible and excruciating for you to watch, then perhaps it's time for TV Squad to find another reviewer who will write about and enjoy the show for what it is, instead of incessantly whining about what's wrong with it.

September 04 2008 at 2:28 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

I really think this season's designers are a lot less talented than last season. I miss last season when things would come down the runway and I would gasp because they were so beautiful/cool/different. Now its like...well, I guess this one is the best, cause the rest make my eyes bleed.

Joe should have been out for that trashy hooker with a hoodie look. The fit was terrible, the color choices were terrible, the silhouette was terrible. I was really mad at the judges this episode.

I am so over Kenley. Her dress was not that great, and she needs to learn some manners. But, she will probably be in the top 3 just by being slightly less terrible than the others.

Korto's dress was basically a ripoff of the AMEX one, which was in the portfolio they had as inspiration. http://bp0.blogger.com/_FW86_jO7k_A/R7I5giE2XRI/AAAAAAAASl0/tLzVV24Box8/s1600-h/DVF_Fall2008_22.jpg

My guess for the rest of the season-
Top 3: Leanne, Korto, Kenley
Top 5: Jerell, Terri
Out soon: Suede, Blayne, Joe

September 04 2008 at 1:43 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

I think Bravo's actually lucking out with this being the last season. It's really to the point that something that was a must watch, I now almost totally ignore it.

On the plus side, it's easier to watch just Mythbusters (which had a lame episode last night as well) then trying to watch Project Runway AND Mytbusters.

September 04 2008 at 11:25 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

I agree that, so far, there's not really been any super amazing designs - just moderately creative, however, I think your personal dislike for Kenley is becoming a little too consuming - I mean, picking on what she was wearing after what some of the other designers have worn this season is a bit much - not to mention calling three judges, who have made fortunes in fashion and the design thereof, "ignorant" simply because they liked what Kenley designed and thought she hit the mark. Sorry, but when it comes to insightful critiques, I'll stick with the non-biased professionals/icons.

September 04 2008 at 10:14 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

Chill, dude. It wasn't that heinous. They're still better than last season's crop, who bored me to tears. And the challenges haven't really played to anyone's strength. And they seem to be giving them less time this year for their work, which in turn is making everyone more stressed and snarky.

September 04 2008 at 8:54 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

I am with you on this season, I dont like anyone, I cant even remember half the names, its "dude with 90's goatee" and "Mrs Jefferson"(Terri) and "greaseball"

I yelled at the TV when Greaseball said that he hope the Fashion legend was MK Olsen.

September 04 2008 at 8:53 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

At least they did better with this challenege then say the Olympic one. Most of the designers got the whole "femme fatale"/"female superspy" angle even if they don't know who Marlena Detrich was.

September 04 2008 at 8:49 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

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