(S05E08) I am so full of anger. And for that, I feel like I must apologize before jumping into my review, which will inevitably ooze frustration. This fury that has been building inside me throughout this season is about to set me alight. To put it bluntly, there is no one that I like in this pool of designers. There isn't even anyone that annoys me less than everybody else. However, I have been hanging on, because I love fashion and I love art and I kind of, sort of like seeing people getting chewed out on the runway. This episode nearly killed me, though, because nearly everyone was so blind to what was going on. Just about all of the designers are either too caught up on snarking behind each other's backs, complaining about nothing, or desperately trying to be a "character", and they've lost sight of their actual work.

Make me happy to be a Project Runway viewer again, designers! Save me from this loathing!

In this challenge, the designers were asked to make something for Diane Von Furstenberg's line, inspired by the 40s espionage look. The winning design would be sold to American Express cardholders. Joe pointed out that this is the exposure that Project Runway is all about. He says "potato", I say potahto"; he says "exposure", I say "increasingly involved shameless plugging."

Follow my seething commentary by checking out the designs on Bravo's website.

Blayne: As one of my friends pointed out, Blayne's scope of pop culture relevance is extremely limited. He didn't know anything about the Beatles and he considers Mary-Kate Olsen a fashion icon? I pray that the rest of the country does not even begin to consider Blayne a proper representation of other arty 20-somethings. His outfit for this week was a real mess, but at least I kind of dug the high collar.

Jerell: This man caught a break this week because just about everyone's work was atrocious. Everyone in the room with me literally gasped out loud when Jerell's model stepped out. Should I talk about the awkward jacket? Or the strange use of the belt? Or the sloppiness of it all? No, I really shouldn't say anything, because I may burst into flames.

Joe: [ALMOST AUF'D] Once again, Joe and his magic facial hair really lucked out. His outfit was horrendous in more ways than one. He somehow made his model look like a gay space salmon. As a person that has struggled with color theory since the beginning of her art experience, even I was appalled by the use of a hot pink cummerbund and that strange red color.

Kenley: First of all, what in the hell was Kenley wearing on the runway? What poor Suess character had to die to keep her shoulders warm? Secondly, how is it that every time I see her, I manage to get more and more annoyed? Just when I think I've hit the ceiling, I break through and there's a whole new level. I thought Kenley's final creation was both a poor use of fabric and design and it blows my mind to think that it was part of the top two, topping Korto's design. It still baffles me that the judges would be so ignorant and quick to call it a "Shanghai" look just because there was a vague indication of a mandarin collar. I couldn't even look at that aspect because I was so distracted by the bizarre sleeves and use of pattern. Honestly, I still stand by what I shouted in the middle of our Project Runway viewing party during this episode, "Everything is poop."

Korto: This was one of the better pieces of the evening, which really isn't saying much, honestly. I think without that print, the outfit wouldn't have been quite as amazing, but I suppose choice of fabric is still a huge part of design. The strange jacket on top was poorly constructed though. It looked like an old bath mat and a bit of string.

Leanne: [WINNER] Bravo, Leanne, for not slacking off just because of previous immunity. The dress she made was fantastic, even if she had the same problem as Korto with the awkward jacket. If she had made it a little cleaner and cropped shorter, it would have been absolutely perfect.

Stella: [AUF'D] She really had it coming as soon as she sassed Tim about the judges in the workroom. I really don't understand the all the back-talking this season. It's like these designers have never seen Project Runway before. Stella's creation was pretty sad this time, taking a very sexy spy and turning her into a goth fleeing from Van Helsing. At least she didn't play up the melodrama when she left. Props for that, Stella.

Suede: Wow. What a mess. His first mistake was choosing that print. His second mistake was using that print straight across instead of turning it and allowing the pattern to head off in a non-horizontal direction. The biggest mistake was not listening to Tim Gunn when he pointed out that the skirt was too poofy, though. Again, it's like this season's designers have never watched an episode of PR in their life.

Terri: Oh, my goodness. I was already cringing when Terri tried on her own super-tight pants, but the photo on Bravo's website makes it look like her model has the most crippling case of camel toe in the history of wardrobe malfunctions. She's even a little hunched over, as if she's about to keel over from the pain and/or embarrassment. As many of the other designers mentioned during the episode, Terri's getting a little boring. She needs to mix things up if she wants to show off her abilities. While I get where she's coming from with the androgynous look, I certainly hope she knows that there's a way to do that without only working with pants and blazers.