Powered by i.TV
February 11, 2012
 
CONNECT    

The Big Bang Theory is the new best lines machine

by Jackie Schnoop, posted Oct 3rd 2008 5:04PM
Leonard and Sheldon on The Big Bang TheoryYears ago it was Seinfeld ruling the quotable roost in television sitcom world. You know you'll never forget "close talkers" or the meaning of "spongeworthy." But for the first time since then, I've found a show I truly think is quoteworthy. Its closet competitor lines-wise is How I Met Your Mother which follows it on Monday night. But The Big Bang Theory rules over that show these days for me.

Some of Sheldon's (played stupendously by Jim Parsons) lines are a bit convoluted to remember and I really am not Louis (oops!) Bill Nye, the Science Guy. However, overall the show's writers deserve kudos for a job well done. Read on past the jump for some of the best lines I've found from the show.

Here are some of my favorite lines from the show:

Penny: I'm a Sagittarius, which probably tells you way more than you need to know.
Sheldon: Yes, it tells us that you participate in the mass cultural delusion that the sun's apparent position relative to arbitrarily defined constellations at the time of your birth somehow affects your personality.
Penny: (confused) Participate in the what?
----
Leonard: What are you doing?
Sheldon: Every Saturday since we've lived in this apartment, I have awakened at 6:15, poured myself a bowl of cereal, added a quarter-cup of 2% milk, sat on this end of this couch, turned on BBC America, and watched Doctor Who.
Leonard: Penny's still sleeping.
Sheldon: Every Saturday since we've lived in this apartment ... [as he repeats his line above]
Leonard: You have a TV in your room. Why don't you just have breakfast in bed?
Sheldon: Because I am neither an invalid nor a woman celebrating Mother's Day.

(I actually know how Sheldon feels. I have my own routines although mine are based on Sunday morning with the CBS Sunday Morning.)

---

Leonard: Are you suggesting that if we let Penny stay [the night], we might succumb to cannibalism?
Sheldon: No one ever thinks it'll happen until it does.
Leonard: Penny, if you promise not to chew the flesh off our bones while we sleep, you can stay.
Penny: What?

---

Leonard: I just know that moving all day can be stressful and I just thought that good neighbors and some Indian food might be just what you need. Plus, curry is a natural laxative and I don't need to tell you that a clean colon is one less thing to worry about.

---

Sheldon: This car weighs, let's say, 4,000 pounds. Now add 140 for me, 120 for you ...
Penny: 120?!
Sheldon: Oh, I'm sorry. Did I insult you? Is your body mass somehow tied into your self-worth?

---

As Leonard fantasizes about his future with Penny ...
Leonard: Our kids will be smart and beautiful.
Sheldon: Not to mention imaginary.
Leonard: I'm a male, and she's a female.
Sheldon: But not of the same species.

---

As the guys need a fourth to play their Halo game, Penny joins in ...
Sheldon: This is a complex battle simulation with a steep learning curve. There are a myriad of weapons, vehicles, and strategies to master, and not to mention an extremely intricate back story.
[Explosion on the video screen.]
Penny: Oh, cool! Whose head did I just blow off?
Sheldon: Mine.

This is one of the few shows in a long time which make me laugh out loud. That can be nothing but a good thing!

Add a Comment

*0 / 3000 Character Maximum

25 Comments

Filter by:
Sambo

Sheldon to Leonard:

"It's my pre-packed disaster evacuation bag. It's recommended by the Department of Homeland Security.... and Sarah Connor."

October 06 2008 at 6:24 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
ldybrdcstr

Another good one... "I don't know what your odds are in the world as a whole, but as far as the population in this car goes, you're a veritable Mac Daddy."

Also..."Oh Gravity, thou art a heartless bitch."

October 05 2008 at 5:01 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Diana Dalton

This is such a hysterical show. Just the right amount of cast members, each actor gets laughs and the tribute to Sheldon Leonard is heartwarming. I really do look forward to watching this show every week. I know I will laugh out loud. Most other sitcoms out there don't make me even chuckle but are just amusing enough to watch. Good call Jackie!

October 05 2008 at 1:54 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
chadwick hansford

AM BATMAN!!!

October 04 2008 at 6:02 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
1 reply to chadwick hansford's comment
alexmonty

"AM BATMAN!!!" Best Line in all seasons from Supernatural!!!



"Cause I cut the brakes! Wild card, b*tches! Yeeeehawwww!!"

October 05 2008 at 12:07 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Joe stalin

CBS Sunday Morning? So you're the one watching that ! There had to be someone.
Great quotes but the thing about Seinfeld's was that they're short and simple (like the political BS on CBS Sunday Morning). You don't have to spit out a paragraph, its just a short simple word or two.

October 04 2008 at 12:12 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
AT

[Oops, I forget that this website doesn't accept HTML in comments. The first paragraph was supposed to be in italics - or quotation marks.]

October 04 2008 at 8:27 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Jim

I'm a big fan of Big Bang Theory, but I have to agree with John Howard above: The show is very well-written, but that doesn't necessarily make it quotable.

I think a show like Three And A Half Men lends itself more to quotes, like this one from a couple weeks ago: "I'd rather spend 10 seconds putting on a condom than 10 years pretending to like soccer."

October 04 2008 at 6:51 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Will

I, too, love The Big Bang Theory. I'm hoping it get many seasons. I am really SO over How I met Your Mother. I know lots of people still really love it & that's all right, it's just,for me, passed it's prime. Barney has been the same obnoxious character for the past 3(? or 4) years, obsessed with having as many women as he can get & now we're suppose to believe he's fallen for Robin ?!? Cm'on!

But back to Big Bang, Leonard's great & I'm hoping they drag it out a little more with Penny, but Sheldon is the one that makes the show & he gets the best lines. Jim Parsons was on Craig Fergeson's show the other night & he was all nervous, it's was his first stint as a talk show guest. He pretty much IS Sheldon, except that he confessed that he really knows nothing about science & has to work at memorizing as the technical stuff for the role. I found that interesting.

October 04 2008 at 3:30 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
1 reply to Will's comment
AT

He pretty much IS Sheldon, except that he confessed that he really knows nothing about science & has to work at memorizing as the technical stuff for the role. I found that interesting.

You mean he has to act? :P

My opinion on the topic: Funny yes, but often too convoluted to be quotable or needing context in other dialogue to be funny (as the third one below). I laughed reading some of the quotes in the post above, in part because I could remember those scenes.

More examples of funny but not quotable (although the douchebag one might be):

Sheldon: At least now you can retrieve the black box from the twisted smoldering wreckage that was once your fantasy of dating her and analyze the data so that you don't crash into geek mountain again.

Howard: Oh, Raj was just comparing Sheldon to a hygiene product used by women who are not feeling fresh on a summer's eve.
Penny: And the bag it came in.

Leonard: Why did you just flash freeze a banana?
Leslie (Sarah Gilbert): I'm having it with my cereal and I couldn't find a knife.

Maybe some quotes can be paraphrased or adapted to work in everyday life, but does that count?

October 04 2008 at 8:26 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Dylan

You throw out the word 'Seinfeld' and the over-righteous fans go nuts.

BBT has some GREAT lines, and is easily one of the most clever shows on television right now.

October 04 2008 at 2:10 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
jproductions17

Personally I'm not a fan of TBBT, but even from a non-biased view looking at those quotes the show is not at all like Seinfeld. Seinfeld is quote worthy in its one liners, all those quotes are long and most need multiple people to say them. Really how applicable is that Halo comment? I'd say Arrested Development and 30 Rock are the two most quotable shows with actual lines, but How I Met Your Mother is by far the most Seinfeld like in making up new words and quick phrases.

How I Met Your Mother has "Crazy Hot Scale", "Lemon Law", "Suit Up!", "Have you met [insert name here]", "Legen-wait for it-dary!", "ted" used a verb such as to "ted out" or "ted up", the many variations of high fiveing (phone five, multiple fives, hypothetical five, etc), "sandwiches", "Underpants Radius", and much much more. And those are just the ones I can think of right off the top of my head.

October 03 2008 at 11:48 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

Follow Us

From Our Partners