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August 1, 2014

Four types of TV gals to avoid

by Bob Sassone, posted Oct 24th 2008 1:01PM
Angela - The OfficeJudy McGuire writes a column titled "The Frisky," and in her latest she lists the four types of TV guys that women should avoid. She singles out Chuck Bass (Gossip Girl), Hank Moody (Californication), Vince Chase (Entourage), and Don Draper (Mad Men).

So in the interest of equal time, I thought I'd list the four gals that male readers/TV viewers should avoid at all costs.

1. Angela Martin and Meredith Palmer (The Office). Angela has zero sense of humor and is completely controlling, with a weird jealousy streak that lies underneath the surface. Plus she's really strict, and not in the good way.

Meredith is a complete mess on so many levels.

2. Angela Petrelli (Heroes). Another gal with no sense of humor (and, oddly, also named Angela). You never know if she's good or evil, she's always trying to manipulate you, and she never stops talking about "save the world this" and "save the world that" and "oh, we have to find the secret formula." I just can't picture ever having a quiet night at home with her, having dinner, watching TV, maybe playing a board game. Screwed up family, too.

3. Patty and Selma Bouvier (The Simpsons). Julie Kavner once described how she plays these characters as "they suck the life out of everything." That's an apt description. Not only do both of them smoke, but they don't shave their legs regularly, their hair is a mess, and they have voices that sound like they gargle with dry kitty litter. A guy wouldn't have any luck with Patty anyway because she's gay, but watch out for Selma.

4. Any girl that would appear on a reality show. I'm not talking about a chef who appears on Top Chef or even a singer who appears on American Idol. I'm talking about a gal who would willingly go on Big Brother or a reality-type talk shows like Jerry Springer or Dr. Phil. I mean, lots of guys like a little crazy (especially if the gal is hot), but even we have limits.

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Donna

Patty and Selma Bouvier have one redeeming factor -- like me, they are BIG fans of "MacGyver". That can't be a bad thing.

October 24 2008 at 11:03 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Dan

Exactly, I'd avoid that girl like the plague...as bad as they come. Her looks still can't make her attractive because of how horrible of a person she is.

October 24 2008 at 6:07 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Joe stalin

Sure the ridiculously hot exception that proves the rule.

October 24 2008 at 2:54 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
4ham

If a girl falls below the Vicky Mendoza diagonal on the Hot/Crazy scale, it's a no go.

October 24 2008 at 2:44 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
2 replies to 4ham's comment
Eddie

Your comment, sir, is a champion.

October 24 2008 at 3:55 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Puck

That was legendary, Robobagins! Comment high-five!

October 24 2008 at 5:11 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Frank

"even a singer who appears on American Idol"

I would also avoid anyone who's going to appear on American Idol

October 24 2008 at 2:08 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Rex from Ars

Angela Martin is totally HAWT, dude!

I can GUARANTEE you that she's one of those girls that's uptight, demanding and ZERO fun... until the clothes come off... then she turns into a freak... and in a good way!

October 24 2008 at 1:43 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
2 replies to Rex from Ars's comment
Butters

Jim you cad. You are engaged to Pam! You should be ashamed of yourself.

:)

October 24 2008 at 2:40 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Galley

Angela is a sultry minx!

October 24 2008 at 3:07 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

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