TV Squad Ten: Why Izzie + Denny = Ridiculous
Welcome to TV Squad Ten, a new semi-weekly feature where we list ten fun things about the current state of TV.
The Izzie/Denny romance has gone from being one of the most fan-adored plots on Grey's Anatomy to one of the most fan-despised over the span of just three seasons. When Denny first popped up as a heart-transplant candidate in season two, it was cute and adorable. Despite the fact that he was dying, the guy was funny and charming - how could you not like him?
Even though it was hard to swallow Izzie's over-the-top attempt to save Denny's life (LVAD wire anyone?), we still bit our tongues and from what I recall, just about everyone went through a whole box of Kleenex when he finally kicked it.
But then he kept coming back. It was infrequent at first and now it's reached the point that Denny is around more now than when he was alive. It's ridiculous and wrong and here are ten reasons why...
10. Denny's dead: Let's get the most obvious reason out of the way: HE'S DEAD. Enough already. Living people should not be having sex with dead people. You'd think that of all the networks, ABC would be the one to have a rule against this. But it's more than that - Denny is not even something physical that Izzie can touch. It's not like she dug him up and started banging his decayed body. It's weirdo ghost sex.
9. Heigl got her wish: Do you realize what this means now? Katherine Heigl, who so famously complained about not getting good material last season and asked to be taken out of Emmy consideration, is now throwing herself into this plot and her character. The story is crap, but c'mon - she's good at her job. That almost guarantees she'll take home an Emmy next year for this Grey's garbage. You watch. Jeffrey Dean Morgan will be in the credited cast next season as a result of this. Mark my words.
8. Less girl-on-girl action: It's really putting a dent in all the lesbian relationships on the show. As much as I couldn't stand Hahn or Callie, at least they were both alive. Dr. Hahn already got the boot a few weeks ago. At least Callie is all giggles over Sadie the intern now. If there's one thing that Grey's Anatomy needs, it's more lesbian sex. Not dead guy sex.
7. Heigl's salary: Did you see what Bob wrote the other day?!? Katherine Heigl makes a boatload of money per season of Grey's Anatomy! NO ONE should get paid that much cash to be having imaginary sex with some dead guy. Porn stars around the world should be very offended right now. Especially the ones who are getting paid way less to do the same thing.
6. Morgan knows how to play dead: And speaking of dead guys, apparently that's all Jeffrey Dean Morgan knows how to play these days. Have you seen his IMDb page? This show. Weeds. Supernatural. Dead, dead, and more dead. It's confusing. How do I know Izzie isn't having sex with Judah Botwin in some weird ABC and Showtime cross-over?
5. This isn't St. Elsewhere: Next we'll find out that Izzie is young Tommy Westphall reincarnated, her head is just like that damn snow-globe the kid had, and the entire show will just be in her head. It may not be a brain tumor, but it's a brain something. So help me god, if this whole show turns into a dream...
4. What about Dr. Karev? Izzie is making love to the bed sheets and there's a perfectly good, alive, and breathing guy telling her that he loves her. What gives? Is she insane? What sensible person would pick Dead Denny over Alive Alex?
3. No clever nickname: I have a hard time buying into any relationship on this show until the guy has an official nickname that all the girls call him. So what do we call Denny now? McMoldy? McCorpse? McMeat Puppet?
2. One more time: Again... because I can't resist... HE'S DEAD. Frankly, I was tempted to list this for all 10 reasons and as far as I'm concerned, this trumps all the others.
1. Ghost babies: And finally, this really just can't work because if they can fall in love and have sex then that means they can have babies like normal people - but they're not normal. Denny is a ghost (or something) and ghost babies are so not "in" right now. Unless they're from Malawi. Is Denny a Malawian?