I can vividly remember a time when The Simpsons was the hot new show that every parent had to keep away from their kids or Child Protective Services would show up and take them away. So every time I see the newest thing that The Simpsons are on this week, I can feel myself aging.

I love The Simpsons. It has been my all time favorite show as it was in the beginning, is now and ever shall be, world without end, amen. So I have to have the coolest Simpsons stuff. But every time I see Bart on a TV shirt, I can feel my hair turning gray and thinner.

When the Krusty-O's boxes popped up in 7-Eleven stores during the release of The Simpsons Movie, my knees felt a little weaker and my spine started curving. The first time I saw the Homer Simpson "Duff" clock that hangs in my kitchen, it gave me osteoporosis with its constant, hilarious and doubly ironic reminder of my own mortality.

Now the United States Postal Service has put The Simpsons on stamps. I just pooped my pants in joy. I hope that was joy.

The USPS unveiled the stamps earlier this morning and are letting the nation's tongues vote on which Simpson they would most like to lick. Personally, I'd go for Marge. As for the stamps...(thanks folks, try the veal, I'll be here all week!)

The site also features a contest where one lucky customer can win an autographed poster signed by series creator Matt Groening, and a store features books of the new stamps and framed prints of the new designs. Neither of those sections appear to be working at the moment (2:30 a.m. Thursday, central time), but since the Postal Service is behind the new site, it will probably be ready sometime later in the summer.