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July 31, 2014

American Gladiators movie has a plot, and no, we're not kidding

by Danny Gallagher, posted Nov 21st 2009 10:02AM
American Gladiators MovieIf you are counting the seconds until the new big screen remake of American Gladiators hits a theater near you, please seek immediate medical attention or the nearest clergyman for guidance.

Screenwriter Peter Iliff has developed a script for the project. The TV tough guys and gals will be turned into "superheroes" in the new movie.

That's it? Isn't that obvious? What the hell else were they going to be?

- A bunch of muscleheaded meatwads pretending to be British nannies in order to see their estranged children.

- Sinewy wimp-eaters who must constantly pull a bus with their teeth at a speed of at least 30 mph or it will explode.

Or perhaps the storyline could go something like this: A ruthless mob boss looking to bump off a key witness traveling overseas plants twelve Gladiators injected with anger inducing pheromones on his plane and unleashes them over the ocean.

Feel free to share your own ideas for this movie in the comments below.

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Robert

I hope they use the Steel (Jonathan Byrne) character from the original series. He was totally crazy, but very funny. In real life and on the show.

November 23 2009 at 12:13 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Charline

Yah, if the Gladiators want to beat the ones on the plane they'd better go alphaero.

November 22 2009 at 6:54 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
MCW

While I truly miss the show - and insane people like The Wolf, I think the plot should mirror the actual show. And that plot would be similar to what you saw in "The Wrestler"... steroid use and all.

November 21 2009 at 10:49 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
bruce

Wow a script for "American Gladiators: The Movie" was given the green light and a budget? Amazing and pathetic. Millions of dollars wasted. That money would have been better spent buying "Garbage Pail Kids" cards for homeless people.

November 21 2009 at 12:30 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
1 reply to bruce's comment
RobynM

Honestly, while I have no intention of seeing it, it can't be any worse than other things that've been greenlit, like the upcoming line of Hasbro game/toy movies. (Monopoly, Candyland, Battleship, Ouija, Stretch Armstrong, a new version of Clue - I wish I were joking about any of these.)

November 22 2009 at 12:41 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
A Gould

Wimpy nerd finds mysterious door that lets him control muscle-bound jocks.

November 21 2009 at 12:15 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Edward

as long I we get to see gina carrano...

November 21 2009 at 11:08 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
1 reply to Edward's comment
MCW

Carano actually, but I do agree... she's already got two roles coming up (with the first link leading to a film already out... I've yet to see it. You'll notice it has a number of MMA "stars" in its cast):

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0346631/
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1506999/

November 21 2009 at 10:52 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
TAD

Better script ideas:

An obsessed serial killer fan locks the cast of the show into the studio and then hunts them down one by one. After a couple of killings, though, the Gladiators use their unique(??) skills to turn the tables.

The Gladiators are at a publicity appearance at a large shopping mall when terrorists arrive and try to kill everyone in it. The Gladiators use their unique(??) skills to beat the terrorists down and save the day.

Yeah - both of those are pretty stupid ideas, but MUCH better than turning them into super-powered heroes. Sigh.

November 21 2009 at 10:39 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

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