Review: Better Off Ted - The Impertence of Communicationizing
by Mike Moody, posted Jan 13th 2010 11:42AM
(S02E08) In the spirit of this episode, lemme just say that ABC is a wasteland full of baboon-butted snot wipes for not giving this show a better timeslot.
OK, it felt good to get that out. Now let's get on with this ...
I hate corporate memos. I hate the jargon, the suggestions, and especially the phony "Ra Ra Ra, Go Team!" messages that are usually tacked on at the end of them. But I've never received a memo advising me to insult my co-workers with abusive language. Of course, I've never worked for Veridian Dynamics, a place where sexual harassment is considered a disease and people are attacked by super lice.
This was a one of the funniest episodes of the season. Sure, Ted's "control freak" plot didn't amount to much, and all the insults were pretty PG (check out the NSFW gag reel), but this one zipped along at a confident pace and even delivered a few nice surprises.
Veronica's guilt, or the "spicy food emotion," led to some of the night's funniest moments. Not surprisingly, Chirs Parnell played the perfect loser. I can't decide what was more pathetic about him, the fact that he lives in his parents' basement or his "suitcase dog." There's no way a sad little guy like that would pass up an offer to settle down with Veronica as babies come shooting out her uterus. No way.
Phil and Lem's adventure was hilarious. It's always great to see the guys collaborating on a bizarre project, even if the end result is to make a shy co-worker feel insecure about her body. And leave it to Phil to think up of a math equation to produce the perfect insult, the Phil-a-buster.
I usually only list five quotes in these reviews ... Well, screw that. This episode was loaded with quotable lines. Fell free to add the ones I missed in the comments:
- Pow! You've been Lem-basted!
- Give a man an insult; he can hurt people for a day. Teach a man to insult; he can hurt people who tease him because he never learned to fish.
- I think I might need new breasts. These are covered in sadness.
- My appearance is not my fault. God made me this way, and then he told me where to shop for suits.
- Could you repeat that in English, I don't speak wuss-ass!
- Your breasts should be on display at the Swiss museum of miniatures
- Let's light this candle and blast off into a calm settled monogamous relationship
- I don't always have to be in control. Though that is my exact job description.
- I don't hate the Dutch. I love the Dutch. That's why I hold them to a higher standard.
- Ewww ... are very thoughtful.
- You've just been Phil-a-busted!
- We just got Ted-ucated!