MTV Movie Awards: The Best and the Worst
If there's one thing that the 'MTV Movie Awards' taught me last night is that a guy my age shouldn't even be allowed to have MTV on his cable.
I know that MTV is way out of my demographic range -- I no longer "want my MTV" -- but I thought there would be something to interest me on tonight's show. More than, say, the 'MTV Music Awards,' which is just an onslaught of tween stars and rap this 44-year-old can't handle. But this had Steve Carell! Tom Cruise! Paul Rudd! Action! Adventure! Comedy! Unfortunately it also had Snooki! and The Situation!
So I was lost, waiting to see what bizarre thing would happen next instead of waiting for what actual award was coming up. It was half only-young-people-will-like-this and half freak show. But it's MTV so there you go. I did watch the whole thing, so here are the Best and Worst moments. Or, to be precise, the #%^$!@* Best and Worst moments.
Tom Cruise's first appearance as Les Grossman. I'm not quite sure why this was such a big thing on this year's show. Wasn't 'Tropic Thunder' from a couple of years ago? But seeing Cruise go all out and dance in a fat suit is pretty funny.
Sandra Bullock. I like how her message was CAN WE PLEASE GET BACK TO NORMAL NOW? I hope we do, but I'm sure we'll go through all of this again when Bullock starts doing interviews for her next movie.
Ed Helms. To be honest, I wasn't thrilled with Ken Jeong's dance, but something about Helms dressed up as a cloud thing just made me laugh out loud (as in LOL).
Betty White. Part of me felt sorry for her that she was even there, but her appearance was one of the few calm moments of the crazy night. I bet some people are all "enough with the Betty White already," but I haven't quite overdosed yet.
'Stunt Kidz.' If it went on any longer it would have been lame, but it was just long enough and it's a cute idea.
Tom Cruise's second appearance as Les Grossman. Wow, way to kill a bit, guys.
The Bullock/Johannson kiss. What could have been just a throwaway, funny bit (Scarlett Johannson standing next to Bradley Cooper and Betty White and even though she has nothing to do), was ruined by actually having her speak and then kiss Bullock. It would have been funnier if Johannson just said one word and then stood there, but no the humor has to be as subtle as The Situation's abs.
Two girls kissing! MTV is so edgy.
The 'Jersey Shore' cast. Speaking of abs and situations and Snooki's, this whole show (and the hour long red carpet special that preceded it) seemed like a giant commercial for the second season of 'Jersey Shore.' I don't get it at all. And I don't even think that's an age thing, it's a common sense thing.
Kristen Stewart. Kristen, honey, I'm sure you're nice and all, but you do know that you're allowed to enjoy yourself, right? You no longer have to act like the sullen girl who bags my groceries at the supermarket and really doesn't want to be there. Also, please don't use the phrase "I'm gonna peace out" ever again.
Will Ferrell and Mark Wahlberg interrupting Tom Felton's speech. I don't think Felton was in on it, even if he did handle the jokes like a pro, but for God's sake the guy just wanted to thank his mom so let him speak.
All of the music. OK, this is probably an age thing.
The swearing. This is a two-fer, as I'm giving a Worst award to both the stars for dropping F-bombs more than Andrew Dice Clay use to and the people at MTV who were asleep at the switch and let a lot of f***s and s***s sneak through. It's shows like this that make me think the Parents Television Council might have a point.
Some random observations about tonight's spectacle:
- I think Shaun White was trying out for the lead in 'The Robert Plant Story.'
- I'm not sure if Russell Brand called Sean Combs "Buffy" or "Puffy," but I'm hoping it's the former because that would be a lot funnier.
- If the material that the cast of 'Grown-Ups' (Sandler, Rock, et al) had when they presented an award is any indication of what we can expect from the movie, well, thanks for the warning.
- The random shots of Paris Hilton posing/applauding. She always has this look on her face as if she's thinking, "I'm so bored with these other celebrities. Is the camera on me yet?"
|Bob, you're such an old fogey. It was great!||116 (23.8%)|
|I want those two hours back.||372 (76.2%)|
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