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October 31, 2014

'The Real Housewives of New Jersey' - 'Reunion Part 1' Recap

by Amy Kuperinsky, posted Aug 31st 2010 9:39AM
Teresa at the 'Real Housewives of New Jersey' reunion. (Season 2, Reunion Part 1) - UHHHHHHHHHHHH.

No, that's not from Danielle's sex tape. It's Teresa's grunt of anger as she hurls profanities at Danielle, nearly flicking Andy Cohen off like a fly when she tries to lunge at her castmate. If she did it with a dressed table, she could do it with a lightweight Bravo host.

When she blows, she hits the ceiling. Then begs for more. Her eyes pop out as she turns into The Incredible Housewife Hulkette. Also: an author of a New York Times bestselling cookbook and mother of four known for making good pasta with ham and peas.

Apparently, as we're told and have definitely witnessed in past episodes (table-flip, country club-chase), Danielle is the only one who brings out this fearsome creature in the housewife who's normally cooing over leopard prints and custom matchy dresses for four young girls.

The minute Teresa uses Andy's 'Jersey Shore' prompt to talk about promiscuity and in doing so point a finger at Danielle, she throws down the gauntlet. She doesn't even wait to get defensive about anything Danielle might say. It seems she's already said enough this season.

Bankruptcy doesn't make Teresa angry (so she says ... ahem, Joe) but this woman does. We get it. Still doesn't make it less trainwrecky. Say Danielle was to cause for Teresa's financial troubles and Joe's accident along with Dina's departure and a supposed attempt to take the former cast member's daughter away. As Caroline rightly says, it still makes Teresa look bad to act this way.

So why does she? How to bottle in mere words the tempest "this" implies is the better question. The only answer could be that she possesses no control. Her rage reaches a point of no return before it can even be capped by the realization that Danielle's "not worth it." Hurricane Danielle? How about Apocalypse Teresa? Who can also make gravy three weeks out of the month.

Things Danielle and Teresa have in common, whether the use of "sanguiches" or their photogenic modeling children, fails to inspire any reconciliation. It's just not "therapeutical." Neither is the fact they have some "ethnenticity" in common, that they're both "woman" or probably would take the same delight in "re-renovation" if given the cash, though they both definitely used some to pay for "cleavlage." It's like Mad Libs!

Does anyone else think Andy secretly wants to get several rounds of the ham game in, like really badly?

Aannnyway. Kim G's in part 2. Think she'll reveal that Teresa gave her some pointers on how to explode for the camera?

Signs of the reunion times

"Do not break up my family, you f**king bitch ... You piece of garbage ... UHHHHHHHHHH ... " - Teresa to Danielle

"Shut your mouth. You're a piece of garbage." - Jacqueline to Danielle

"Do not speak of my sister." - Caroline to Danielle.

"You're a pig. Look at yourself. You're disgusting." - Teresa to Danielle

Andy Cohen: "The plural of woman is ..."
Danielle: "Woman."
Andy: (weirded out) ... "Women."

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rympup

I have never liked Danielle for her over-the-top antics and her supposed "need" for armed guards. However, after watching the reunion shows, I was pleasantly surprised to see how SHE was the one who was the most civilized. Theresa is a ticking bomb, who believes she is teflon. According to her, NOTHING is her fault, even though it was obvious that she had been the one to instigate the incident at Kim's fashion show. She has no qualms about making Joe get her a ring for their anniversary, at the same time that they were filing for bankruptcy! And what about the huge housewarming and baby christening party? Anyone with any sense of decency would have recognized that spending $$$ was something that had to be curtailed. She has no sense of her stupidity, and is in total denial about how she's been training her brats to be as spolied as she is. As for them declaring bankruptcy? Her response, "so we now have a fresh start"....what about all of the people who they stiffed, and all of the taxpayers who will be paying for their messes? She has learned nothing from the experience. I for one can no longer watch this show, mainly because of Teresa and the disgusting things that come out of her mouth.

September 07 2010 at 1:21 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
elle

Not sure what to think? Theresa? Anger management courses? Perhaps a disorder somewhere? Discipline your children....Danielle, I really think despite everything - you managed, in the lions den, to keep it together. Now dear, begin with getting your life in order. Your daughter's need YOU! Jacqueline, are you scared, intimidated by the family? You certainly seem to be trying to "blend in." Appears you have no real SAY nor BACKBONE. Caroline... Seriously, you didn't have to say negative things about Danielle, your look, body language says it all. Funny how Theresa trashes Jersey Shore - You guys totally steal their Thunder.

September 01 2010 at 1:19 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Tina

Wow that was an explosive reunion. Amazingly a lot of twitterers and bloggers are on Danielle's side here:

http://www.showtribe.com/show/The-Real-Housewives-of-New-Jersey/552/twitter

Who would've thunk it

September 01 2010 at 6:18 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
jayne042876

Help me out someone. What was Danielle saying/referring to exactly, that got Theresa so riled up?? I can't tell from the beginning of the clip.

September 01 2010 at 3:02 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
slyder66666

I LOVE TERESA. DANIELLE IS THE DERANGED ONE. AND DANIELLES DAUGHTERS DO A VACANT STARE IN THEIR EYES LIKE THEY HAVE NO EMOTIONS. WATCHING DANIELLE DOING THE POLE DANCE WITH HER LEGS SPREAD AND HER BUTT CRACK SHOWING WAS DISGUSTING.

September 01 2010 at 2:56 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
bebe

















Theresa is a 1081,Bravo thinks that that violence is good for ratings,but she is going to seriously hurt someone one time.Caroline thinks that her words are the law.She didn't exactly tell the story staight about her meeting with Danielle.Jacqueline is the biggest idiot of all, last year her conscience wouldn't let her lie for the inlaws about Danielle.Well they really did a job on her because she keep attacking Danielle for no reason at all this year.Danielle has the right idea, she gets out of the area when they get physical with her.I read where Bravo fired her.That's the end of the show..they won't have anyone to talk about.Watch out Jacqueline, you will be their new victim.Because you are an idiot.Caroline needs to spent her time watching Albert,now that he has lost weight he is impressed with himself.She needs to do more than lose 25 lbs. to keep up with him.




September 01 2010 at 2:13 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
DAZ

WHY CAN'T ANYONE SEE THAT TERESA IS LOW CLASS, DUMB, CRAZY, NO TASTE IN CLOTHES OR HOME DECORATION? CAROLINE THINKS SHE'S THE "GODMOTHER", WHAT A PIECE OF WORK! JACQUELIN DOESN'T HAVE BUT HALF A BRAIN. IF CAROLINE OR TERESA SAY JUMP, SHE WANTS TO KNOW HOW HIGH, BIG DUMMY, LOL. WE WON'T EVEN TALK ABOUT THAT SNEAKY TWO FACED KIM G. THEY ALL WENT TO ITALY TO GET AWAY FROM DANIELLE, YET SHE'S ALL THEY TALKED ABOUT.LOL DANIELLE MAY BE A LITTLE NUTTY BUT HER CHILDREN ARE GREAT! JACQUELIN CAN'T CONTROL HER CRAZY ASS DAUGHTER AND TERESA'S DAUGHTERS ARE BRATS. I'M DONE WITH THIS SHOW! ANDY IS SUCH AN INSTIGATOR.

August 31 2010 at 10:44 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
2 replies to DAZ's comment
sick of this show

I agree with you 100%. Jacqueline, Caroline, and Teresa all look like mean girls -- like they are ganging-up on Danielle. Jacqueline is so high-schoolish, and Teresa is so pre-k. Caroline is just a bully, and Kim G. -- an old idiot with a foul mouth. Not much to say about Danielle, except that she carries herself well under pressure no matter what mess she's in.

September 01 2010 at 11:44 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Sienna

OMG - I totally, totally agree with you!!! What have these people accomplished on this show? I honestly think now that Danielle is going to be out of the show, these women will have nothing to talk about and hence, will not have a show. The only thing these women know how to do is GOSSIP. What a bunch of losers!!

September 07 2010 at 6:45 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
GingerD


Watching Teresa makes me stop and wonder what level of education she
completed? Sometimes I have been embarrassed for her. I think she is a
drama queen, got so much attention when she turned the table over, she
is trying to recapture that limelight. And what's with her husband,
Joe? What a grumpy little man! She is so loving to him and gets a
grunt in return. I do feel she deserves to be treated better by him.
Although her spending most likely caused much of his crankiness. My
favorite is Caroline. She seems most real, a great mother and wife.
Danielle? I just can't figure that one out. Sometimes I think she is a
evil trouble maker who makes mountains out of every mole hill. Then
times when I actually feel sorry for her. I'm just thankful my life
does not contain anyone like her or Teresa. I do know a couple Kim G's
:)To all the house wives, you want to be considered ladies, CLEAN UP
THE LAUNGUAGE! There are more beeps than monologue.

August 31 2010 at 9:56 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
gwalker46

And I thought Danielle was crazy. Her daughters are great and at least Christine has succeeded in spite of her mother. Watching this season unfold was hilarious. Teresa is out to get her 15 min. of fame by flipping tables, showing us that she can swear and go ballistic in less than 5 seconds. Wow, what a gal. Jacqueline is a doll and I actually have started to like Caroline. Go figure.

August 31 2010 at 8:50 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

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