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November 20, 2014

'The Vampire Diaries' Season 2, Episode 1 (Season Premiere) Recap

by Jean Bentley, posted Sep 10th 2010 6:05AM
'The Vampire Diaries'['The Vampire Diaries' - 'Bad Moon Rising']

It should be clear to anyone who's caught more than one episode of 'The Vampire Diaries' that writers Kevin Williamson and Julie Plec could teach a master class in cliffhangers. The artful pacing the two employ quickly became a defining characteristic of the show's first season, and, judging from the Season 2 premiere, it's not going away any time soon.

Seriously, if your brain could process anything more than "AHHHH" during the last two minutes of the show, well, you were probably watching something else. In lieu of just writing "OMG" about 500 times, here are the complete sentences we managed to form after watching the season premiere.

Good ol' Williamson and Plec (that sounds like a law firm, or at least an interior decorating team) wasted no time in addressing the plethora of questions left unanswered at the end of last season. After discovering her Uncle John's blood-soaked body in the kitchen, Elena grabbed the bloody knife next to her birth father/adoptive uncle's body and crept through the house while Katherine swooped around behind her. Alas, Katherine didn't show herself, and Elena rushed upstairs to check on her little brother.

Thankfully, Jeremy lived to mope another day! After downing a vial of vampire blood and a bottle of painkillers, Jeremy didn't actually die. In fact, the vamp blood accelerated the healing process and he woke up just as healthy as he was pre-OD.

Uncle John was okay too. Turns out having your fingers chopped off and then being stabbed in the gut with a kitchen knife is a totally survivable injury. The more you know! This development is conflicting, however, because David Anders is pretty much the best, but his character is a supreme d-bag. He won't be sticking around long, because after Elena left his hospital room, Stefan force-fed Uncle J some vampire blood, telling him to skedaddle out of Mystic Falls within the next 24 hours or he'd become undead too.

Paul WesleyRelated: Angry Stefan is even sexier than Broody Stefan, and much more fun. Paul Wesley seems to fully embody his character when he's given actual emotion to portray. Keep that in mind, writers. He's like the Hulk, except instead of turning into a giant green monster, he turns into ... uh ... something really sexy.

Angry Stefan reappeared when Katherine wandered back into the Gilbert house. Though she posed as Elena, Stefan could tell immediately that it was Katherine and not his mortal GF. He did the veiny eye thing and told her to get lost (he doesn't really have much in his arsenal of threats, does he?).

Pause here to swoon over Angry Stefan again. Ok, you may continue.

Damon was pretty confused when Elena kept denying that they kissed -- she thought he was crazy, he thought she was in denial -- until he realized what had happened. This made for Awkfest 2010 when he explained to his brother and Elena what happened, though later Stefan told him that he didn't want to fight about it.

When Damon finally caught up with Katherine, he was furious. She gave him an ultimatum: "Kiss me or kill me, which will it be, Damon?" Clearly, since he's been in love with her for the past 145 years, he chose the kiss option, and put his womanizing skills to good use by artfully tearing off her clothes.

Judging by her lacy bra, Katherine has much sexier taste in lingerie than Elena. Plus, you can tell Katherine's a badass because she has curly hair and wears leather jackets. Good girls like Elena have straight hair and wear cotton underwear.

Unfortunately for Damon, things didn't go much further than that, because Katherine told him she never loved him. You can probably guess how well that went over. (Um, not well.)

'The Vampire Diaries' Season 2 Episode 1Damon, naturally, got drunk and went on the warpath. He confessed to Elena that he thought there kinda was something going on between them, then kissed her. But, for the second time that day, he was brutally rebuffed. Jeremy came in to break up the commotion. Since Damon didn't actually know what to do when experiencing emotion, he decided it would be a good idea to SNAP JEREMY'S NECK. Because that turned out so well for Vicki!

If you turned to the imaginary person sitting on the couch next to you and audibly screamed "OH MY GOSH," you might or might not be the only one that happened to. You possibly also let out a gigantic breath you didn't even know you were holding when you saw that Jer was wearing the Gilbert family ring that protects against supernatural death and knew it would be okay.

But the OMG moments weren't over: Back at the hospital, Katherine had snuck into Caroline's room. The day before, Sassy Bonnie convinced Damon to give Caroline some of his blood to help her heal faster, so Caro was doing pretty well in the recovery department. That is, UNTIL KATHERINE SMOTHERED HER WITH A PILLOW. This is your brain normally: "Hello, I am an articulate person!" This is your brain during the end of an episode of 'The Vampire Diaries': "AHHHHHSGHLSJHGWIO!!!!"

Other things that happened: Bonnie tussled with both Damon and Katherine (and held her own!). Tyler's smokin' hot Uncle Mason came to town. And, for the record, Aunt Jenna is still as dense as ever.

Damon quip of the week:

When Elena asked if he was okay after finding out he actually kissed Katherine: "I kissed you, I thought you kissed me back, doppelganger hijinks ensued ... how do you think I'm doing?"

How was the season premiere? What do you think happened to Caroline?!

'The Vampire Diaries' air Thursdays at 8PM ET on The Cw.

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Hayley

Damon broke my heart so many times in this episode especially when he turned around and said "now I'm hurt"! I almost cried. And I agree about being completely incapable of speaking articulately when it comes to Vampire Diaries!

September 10 2010 at 6:11 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

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