'Eastbound & Down' Season 2, Episode 3 Recap

['Eastbound & Down' - 'Chapter 9']

Kenny Powers wants everything we want. He just goes about getting it in different, and often more infection-inducing ways. We all want to be loved, to be respected, to be happy, and to be the guy who brings the mullet back to hairdo prominence, but we search for those things with a sense of propriety that, so far, has eluded Kenny.

In his defense, it's tough to live with propriety when you think the word is Spanish for "prosthetic limb." Some things never change, and the world as we know it would cease to exist if they did.

I'd say that Kenny was using psychology to keep Stevie interested in being his indentured servant if I didn't already know that all Stevie needs in order to keep hanging around is to occasionally be tolerated by Kenny. Together, they bickered over Stevie wearing one of Kenny's thongs out of the dirty laundry like a married couple ... an ugly, filthy, hairy married couple. Kenny convinced Stevie to fix the Denali and set up the apartment for his own good, when he would have gladly done it for a "good job, Stevie," or an open-mouthed kiss.

"Gettin' everybody to love me is a full time job, alright!" Kenny wants everyone to love him for being pretty much like everybody else. When he complained to his coach about the lackluster fans, his coach replied with "you think that's the first time any of our fans have seen a strike out?" Nothing frustrates Kenny more than when people don't react incredulously to his mediocrity, and the Mexican fans are his latest targets.

One of the things that makes Kenny such an interesting character is that for all his deplorable traits, he doesn't lack ambition. A lesser, washed-up, old relief pitcher would have moved to Shreveport, La. to open a bait shop by now, but not Kenny. He was busy laying out the next few steps of his comeback with Stevie and Catuey, one of which was to have sex with one more woman to finally get over April.

The boys set out to make Kenny into the flame-throwing, f-bombing, superstar he once was, and it all began with a supermarket grand opening. Upon his introduction, Kenny appeared looking like a mildly retarded extra from 'The Three Amigos.' His presence was met with more apathy while he started to wonder what he needed to do to get these people excited. The day was not a complete waste, however, as Vida, the voluptuous singer who keeps randomly bumping into Kenny, showed up. She looks like Salma Hayek if Salma Hayek had been a stripper since she was 16 years old. Fortunately, Kenny Powers doesn't need much more than that to start making it weird.

They engaged in some rather disturbing, yet effective, flirting. He, most likely not even remembering what he said, and she realizing the kind of jackass she was dealing with, made the entire encounter far more positive than it ever should have been. Vida agreed to accompany Kenny to a party on team owner Sebastian's yacht.

Meanwhile, Stevie was saddled with fixing the Denali and the sweet beginnings of a romance were starting to percolate between him and Maria, Catuey's sister in-law and Stevie's gunshot wound nurse. The gentle rhythm of love's sweet dance was abruptly interrupted by Aaron and Hector, Kenny's old posse. They were looking for Kenny saying they found Eduardo Sanchez and to meet them at Big Red's grave.

Kenny and Vida arrived at the party, which was an elaborate scheme to use women's body parts as metaphors for Kenny's own decisions in front of him. Vida has a backside that won't quit, and April's boobs are the stuff of legend. As Sebastian and Kenny watched Vida shake her thang, they waxed misogynistic about being an ass or a breast man ... but for Kenny there was far more at stake -- was he a Vida or an April man?

The morning after Kenny made up his mind, he ran into Tony, Vida's teenage son. What followed was, as you can probably imagine, the most awkward sex talk ever ... not so much because it was a creepy-guy-mom-slept-with/son talk, but more because it was an obnoxiously American/Mexican talk. Kenny then discussed, in graphic detail, the exploits of his evening over dinner with Catuey's family. In his own inimitable way, he started to rationalize his possible getting together with Vida while simultaneously erasing April from his life.

Kenny was being extremely aloof when Stevie brought up the subject of Eduardo Sanchez. Apparently, Kenny "came to Mexico to find answers," and he "thought maybe Eduardo would hold those answers."

Back on the mound, Kenny was still dumbfounded by the fans' lack of interest or pulse. When the opposing team started talking smack all up in Kenny's area, he answered back with a 90-mile-an-hour heater into their dugout, and as the first player rushed out to the mound, absorbing the first blow of a bench-clearing brawl, the fans erupted in a frenzy of cheers. It's all about giving the people what they want, and they wanted senseless violence.

At Big Red's grave, Stevie and Kenny met the unusually angry Aaron and Hector where they squabbled over the whereabouts of Eduardo Sanchez. Stevie and Aaron had a sidekick pissing contest, and Kenny ended up giving Aaron $40 for a phone book, and everyone walked away upset, with the mystery of Eduardo Sanchez still unclear. But Kenny seemed to think he'd found something he was looking for.

Cut to Kenny treating Vida and Tony to a night at the carnival, where he got about as real as Kenny can. In typical Kenny fashion, he jumped into something huge on a whim. He came about as close to proposing to Vida as he could without a rose and a Michael Bublé song. He told her he wanted to commit to her and Tony, to be a father figure: "[I've] taken it slow before, and it did not work out so good. So I'm doin' s@#t different this time. I'm takin' it super fast." Vida wasn't quite on board, like she might be hiding something. But Kenny asked "who wants to go on this roller coaster ride?" And we're left to wonder if he's talking about their life together or the actual ride at the carnival. Kenny Powers, master of double entendre.

'Eastbound & Down' airs Sun., 10:30PM ET on HBO.

Dr. Vaughan teaches English/Media/Humor courses at Binghamton University in upstate New York, and he'll let you ride shotgun. You can also check out his blog at drvtv.wordpress.com or www.facebook.com/pages/Ryan-Vaughan/21931402981