['Weeds' - 'Theoretical Love Is Not Dead']

After all the years of watching 'Weeds,' have you ever questioned anyone's lineage?

Silas has been the only Botwin with any sense of responsibility and poise in this family circus, and there might be good reason for it.

He may not be a Botwin.

Why have we not noticed this before? All the signs were there. Nancy and Shane have always more closely resembled members of the Addams Family with their creepy behavior, while Silas mostly moped and got by on his surfer boy good looks.

Which brings us to Nancy -- the entire show has been predicated on Nancy being a single mom who simply wanted to provide for her family by illegal means. Now the audience is being led to believe she's nothing but a daughter of an alcoholic who lost her virginity to her math teacher Mr. Schiff (played by Richard Dreyfuss) in high school.

C'mon writers! If you wanted to attribute Silas' surfer boy good looks to someone, couldn't you have given us Mark Paul Gosselar for one more episode?!

The family decides to flee the country, so they need fake passports and one last big "score". Naturally, they head to Dearborn, Michigan.

Dearborn happens to be Nancy's childhood home; her old house is still marked by a hideous mermaid mailbox.

Having nowhere else to go, Nancy and crew end up shacking up with her former paramour and high school math teacher, Warren Schiff, who still holds a candle for Nancy. (And her picture in his wallet.)

While perusing Nancy's old yearbooks, it's Mr. Schiff who plants the seed in Shane and Silas' head that Silas resembles Nancy's high school boyfriend, Lars. The pair decided to pay a visit to Nancy's old flame, where Shane is able to steal hairs for a DNA test.

Andy grabs a yoga mat and heads to the local mosque to find someone to make passports. Apparently, all Muslims know where to get fake passports. (With all the remarks on how Jewish the Botwins have been throughout the season, it wasn't surprising that the writers would go so far to include such an offensive scene in this episode).

Doug continues to add nothing significant to the storyline -- Kevin Nealon seems content just keeping his SAG membership intact.

For the most important part of the episode, Nancy meets an unfamiliar high school classmate, Ellis Tate. While visiting her parents' grave, she's greeted out of nowhere by this individual, who asks if she wants to go on a date. Turns out it's the F.B.I. hot on her tail.

Weird-looking F.B.I. agent: 1 | Esteban: 0