'The Real Housewives of Miami' Season 1, Episode 7 (Reunion) Recap
['The Real Housewives of Miami' - 'Reunion']
It's probably no surprise that the first-ever live 'Housewives' reunion show resulted in more than one commercial-break brawl. And that they needed an electric fan set up in that sweaty Bravo clubhouse (it wasn't for the windswept hair, was it?)
Most telling was the suddenly out-for-blood Adriana and her not so subtle hint that if everyone was a magnet for drama like her, the show would be better. Even she inferred that the series' plots, and perhaps the women themselves, weren't exactly riveting.
Actually, as a person, Adriana seemed a little subdued on the show. Yet here, even the soft ones, Marysol and Alexia, were also on the defensive. Adriana, Lea and Alexia all had some kind of beef with Cristy. Cristy had a beef with Alexia over two different sound bites and Marysol went to bat for Elsa in refusing to forgive Larsa so long after her offense against her mother, "the witch."
After Adriana's comment about the show needing more Adrianas, it was hard to see her constant stream of bleep-worthy vitriol as anything more than a play for people to keep watching. A last-ditch effort. Lea offering a few taps on her knee did just about as much to calm her down as encourage her to ensure plentiful ratings. Sure, the show was live, but it was also the shortest type of reunion with the smallest set (the beginning was starved of wide shots). With the original premiere season supposedly cut in half, there wasn't much of a demand for a two-parter reunion a la Atlanta or New York.
Launching statements in Cristy's direction such as, "You look like a man" and "Just Google yourself," Adriana appeared fired up about the never-ending tickets situation, but Cristy refused to bite all that much. She remained unmoved by most allegations, or at least not bothered enough to defend herself beyond a few even-keeled explanations. Even if she happened to be the one who's wrong, she looked more right, at least in her match with Adriana, simply because she was more composed. Yet, in Adriana's estimation, that approach is wrong if you want your series renewed. This equation may as well ring true in 'Housewives' land.
Andy's been indulging in his love affair with Elsa via 'Watch What Happens: Live' all season, so her presence was undoubtedly missed. Also, who would've thought Marysol would be the one to get the DUI? (In addition to Elsa, of course). Then again, they do have that giant wine unit, the subject of an interior decorating dispute between the newlyweds.
Lea remained a barrel of laughs. Not that she was funny, but she didn't fail to make herself laugh, pshawing any notion that she uses her cackling to push passive aggression on everyone else. It's still surprising that she didn't at least offer some form of apology for hurting Marysol with her green card comment. If Marysol can brush it off, Lea can meet her halfway.
After Adriana's rants, the cast looked off to different sides as the show cut to break, trying not to make eye contact with each other or the camera. These are not pleasant affairs, but at least this time, in such close quarters, Andy wasn't tossed aside like a rag doll. Still, the whole thing was rushed: The six-episode season, the reunion, the series at large.
Will it return? The outlook is not good, if not already decided. And if it does, what changes would you want to see?
'The Real Housewives of Miami Reunion' aired at 9PM ET on Bravo.