['Glee' - 'Born This Way']

Faced with 90 minutes of airspace -- more like 60 or so, after commercials -- to fill, 'Born This Way' could have gone in any number of bad, self-indulgent directions. We could have had wall-to-wall music, or the Gleesters could have done a medley that lasted ten minutes long. Or, we could have had a handful of story threads going at once, none of them progressing with any satisfaction.

Instead, we got a pretty damned good episode. Sure, there was a self-indulgent moment or two, but for the most part we got good story, good music, some pretty fine acting, and even a fun surprise or two along the way.

And here's the first surprise: No Sue Sylvester. At all.



It's amazing to me how far Sue has fallen in such a short period of time. Jane Lynch won an Emmy and a Golden Globe for the role and now it seems like Ryan Murphy and company don't know what to do with her. And it's pretty much been a given that Sue has been bringing the show down in the episodes she's been in. But to see her not even show up in an extended event episode like this was shocking.

So much went on this week, that it might be best to take each story one at a time, first we need to celebrate...

The Return of Kurt ... and Karofsky's "Change of Heart"

How good was it to see Kurt back in New Directions? Murphy, Falchuk and Brennan kept him away from McKinley for far too long. Yes, it gave Darren Criss his time to shine with the Warblers. But something about Kurt was missing, like he couldn't quite be himself. And, despite the fact that it took up an entire segment -- that's what happens when you have 90 minutes -- Chris Colfer belting Streisand's 'As If We Never Said Goodbye' was a good welcome-back song for him, and a heck of a performance.

The machinations to get him back, thanks to Santana, were what really made this story. She knows Karofsky is gay; she also knows that Kurt is the key to their winning nationals. So, her "Lady Macbethian" logic, as Kurt put it, was to threaten to out Karofsky so he'd not only be her beard but he'd also pledge to stop his bullying. This way, Kurt comes back, New Directions wins, and she and Karofsky become prom queen and king. Kurt's right: Eve Harrington of 'All About Eve' couldn't have done any better.

I do give Kurt credit for sussing out what Karofsky's angle on his change of heart was, as well as Karofsky for not beating around the bush with Kurt. It was a mature way for this situation to be handled; instead of Kurt buying the act only for Karofsky to turn on him later on, he managed to pull some conditions out of Karofsky himself, like getting Karofsky to join PFLAG, mainly for his own good. He can stay in the closet all he wants, but he needs to learn how to live with others who are gay. Very mature and satisfying way to deal with this issue.

Oh, and not for nothing, but it seems like Santana and Karofsky's "Bullywhips" uniforms make them look a whole lot like this.

The Story of Lucy Caboosey

This had to be the most interesting plot twist of the night. Did it come out of left field? Maybe. But it does seem pretty consistent with Quinn's fascination with making sure everything about her high school life is "perfect." She gets the captain of the football team, she's the head Cheerio, she becomes prom queen.

She should know not to mess with Lauren Zizes; if Lauren, with Puck's encouragement, wants to run for prom queen, she should have just let her. I kind of wish we would have seen Quinn mess with Lauren to get her pissed enough to find that wonderfully silly-looking Lucy Fabray middle school photo. The scene where Lauren confronts her with what she knows was a great acting job by Dianna Agron, as she owned up to her former life as a big girl with acne and a schnoz.

And, since Lauren is not Kurt and doesn't mind outing someone, the scene where Quinn does a slow-motion run out of the room as she realizes in horror that the poster of her Lucy days is all over the school was funny, mainly because it feels like it would be more appropriate on 'Nip/Tuck' than here.

Of course, that makes her supporting Rachel's quest to be more "Fabrayic" instead of "Hebraic" more understandable. It wasn't just her being ruthless; it was her sympathizing with what Rachel is going through, mainly because she had been there. Agron and Lea Michele did a nice job on their duet, a mash-up of 'I Feel Pretty' and TLC's 'Unpretty.' Little did we know at the time what Quinn's underlying feelings were when she sung that song.

Which leads me to...

Rachel's Nose Job

This is where I needed to strain a bit to buy into the story. Finn breaking her nose and Rachel's subsequent desire to get her honker shaved down was a good entryway into the "Born This Way" story. But it really does strain credibility to think that Rachel considers herself ugly, given the exceeding amount of confidence she has about her talent and future prospects. I mean, Finn didn't want her to change her nose. Puck talked to her as "one hot Jew to another." At this point, she seems to be pretty damned popular, at least as far as the guys are concerned. Most of the girls at McKinley -- except Lauren, of course -- are probably telling her to get over herself.

Not sure what the mall flash mob that Kurt put together did to convince Rachel to keep the nose. This was the second self-indulgent moment, and the least necessary number of the night. Haven't we been here before, a few times? Do we need more mall dancing numbers?

Emma Confronts Her OCD

For once, there was a genuine interaction between Will and Emma. Will wants Emma to get help for her OCD, but she won't own up to it in public... her original "Born This Way" t-shirt said "GINGER" instead of "OCD." So, instead of dating Emma, Will's doing the smart and mature thing and trying to help her live a better life. The best part of that story was her therapy session -- her therapist was played by Kathleen Quinlan, for heaven's sake -- where we saw Emma's emotions come to the surface. Nice job by Jayma Mays on that scene. Emma needs to become less anxious and less obsessed if the writers have any hope of making us care about Emma and Will.

The "Born This Way" Shirts

Everyone had a good shirt:

Will: Butt Chin
Emma: OCD (eventually)
Lauren: Bad Attitude
Sam: Trouty Mouth
Artie: Four Eyes
Mike Chang: Can't Sing
Finn: Can't Dance
Tina: Brown Eyes
Rachel: Nose
Kurt: Likes Boys
Quinn: Lucy Caboosey
Mercedes: No Weave (not sure why she hates that she doesn't have a weave)
Puck: I'm With Stupid (points to his crotch)
Brittany: I'm With Stoopid (points to herself)

The only one who didn't participate in the final number -- Lady Gaga's new single "Born This Way" -- was Santana, who was wearing the "Lebanese" shirt Brittany made for her. Brittany had a great point in one of her increasingly not-stupid moments: why is she hiding her sexuality? She's the baddest-ass girl in the school and would cut anyone who dared make fun of her. I'd imagine Santana is going to admit she likes girls at some point; at least the guys will be intrigued by her, right?

More fun stuff:

-- I know the Warblers sang a Keane song, but like most Warblers songs, I don't remember much about it. It really seemed like Blaine felt he was losing Kurt now that he's back home, doesn't he?

-- Santana's rant about everyone's weaknesses was a Santana classic, especially when Sam was going to doctors looking for lip reductions.

-- Finn's dance to 'I Gotta Be Me' was also pretty forgettable, even if he was helped along by Mike Chang!

-- Tina now wants to look up to the person she wants to become as an Asian sex symbol. Can't she look up to Olivia Munn? Maggie Q? Grace Park?

Sue -- and Terri -- are back next week. Wonder if that means next week's episode will suck? We'll find out.

'Glee' airs Tuesdays at 8PM ET on FOX.

Here is AOL Music's recap of the songs on the episode.

Follow @joelkeller on Twitter and on Facebook.

Watch the full episode here: