Summer is here! For some, that means barbecues, pool parties and beach bonfires; for the alumni of ABC's 'Bachelor' and 'Bachelorette' franchises, it means 'Bachelor Pad' -- possibly the trashiest, tawdriest trainwreck of a reality competition show since 'Temptation Island,' and we just can't resist it! (Believe us, we've tried.)

If you thought last year's contest was crazy, you ain't seen nothing yet. Wedging feuding exes Jake Pavelka and Vienna Girardi back into one house seemed juicy enough, but add in the likes of Kasey "Guard and Protect Your Heart" Kahl, Gia Allemand, Justin "Rated R" Rego and crazy-eyes Michelle Money, and you've got the most combustible group of contestants ever to grace our screens.

Join us after the jump for our Top 5 most awkward moments from the season premiere. Can you guess how many involve Jake and Vienna?

1. Jake tries to make nice
You can always rely on reality TV to prolong the inevitable, but was there really a doubt in anyone's mind that the Terminator known as Jake Pavelka would be entering the 'Bachelor Pad' house? (No, duh, because we've all seen the promos.)

Vienna was quaking in her Uggs from the moment the cameras first laid their lenses on her, but those expecting a firework display to match Jake and Vienna's last on-screen meeting were sadly disappointed. Instead, when Jake's limo finally pulled up and he made his grand entrance, Jake, Vienna and her new beau Kasey talked about ... the weather. For like five minutes. Jake was clearly trying to make televisual magic happen, but there's a limit to how scintillating a discussion of the current temperature can be, right?

Vienna's meeting with Gia was every bit as uncomfortable, as Jake's two cast-offs exchanged brief hellos before Trouty Mouth unceremoniously dismissed Vienna with a hair toss and moved on to her next potential victim mate. Burn.

In point of fact, pretty much every 'Bachelor Pad' reunion was so uncomfortable it was like a stiletto straight to my soul -- from Jackie and Michelle's brusque brush off to Holly and Michael's faux-cheerful joke introductions. If you were taking a shot every time a contestant laid eyes on someone they hated or had once hooked up with, you would've been hammered by the fifteen minute mark. (Someone attempted it, right?)

But Jake didn't curtail his awkwardness at the introductions. Oh no, he had more weirdness to bestow, making the calculated decision to give the third rose of the week to Vienna in an act of "goodwill." Vienna and Kasey laughed it off in private (before going to have sex, ew) while Jake sat in the room with an ignorantly blissful smile.

2. Blake and Kirk are the same person
Please tell me I'm not the only one who noticed this, because for a good chunk of the episode, I couldn't tell these two apart and was trying to figure out who the ninth guy in the house was. It was a very traumatic time for me.


But seriously, did we ever see them in the same shot? Or is one of them a figment of our collective imagination? One of them was allegedly in Ali's season and one of them was in Ashley's ... but were they? Stick a baseball cap on one of them and they could be twins, is all I'm saying. (THEY'RE PRACTICALLY WEARING THE SAME SHIRT.)

3. Whatever the producers must've done to make that "random" child approve of Jake
Now, I'm not disputing the fact that Jake can probably make small children cry, but happy tears? I'm not convinced. Did they find a kid who wants to be on TV so badly she'll say anything? Did they ship in an actress capable of crying on demand and looking adorable to "randomly" bump into Jake and Jackie on the street? We'll never know for sure, but I'm on to you, Jake Pavelka.

4. The "Hook Up" competition
Some of the main joys of last year's 'Bachelor Pad' were the delightfully tacky competitions for immunity, and this year's show looks set to continue that tradition. The first competition had the girls wrapping themselves around the guys (in bikinis, natch) and trying to hold on for as long as possible while suspended off the ground. Although it was fairly cringeworthy to watch the guys' various extremities going purple from lack of circulation, the most awkward moment has to go to Justin, who classed up the joint by asking what would happen if one of the guys got a little too "excited" during the competition. At this point, if he doesn't know, we can't help him.

5. Jake and Gia in general
I'm not sure what was worse, Jake accidentally calling Gia "Vienna" in a heated moment (she's like his default arguing partner, I guess), or Gia actually thinking that the Greeks invaded Troy by sneaking inside in a giant elephant. Wow. The fact that Gia also called Jake a "good guy" merits some kind of psychiatric evaluation, I think. Stay masochistic, girl!

'Bachelor Pad' airs Mondays, 8PM ET on ABC.

What did you think of Jake and Vienna's interactions -- have you switched sides, or do you think they're both as crazy as each other? Were you sad to see Justin and Alli go? Share your reactions below!

Check out the full episode below:








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