In these trying economic times, it's a good thing that we have respectable newspapers like the 'New York Post' to break the situation down for us simpler folks who can't follow all the jargon and numbers.

Stephen Colbert was only too happy to walk us through one such piece on last night's 'Colbert Report' (weeknights, 11:30PM ET on Comedy Central).

He was perusing yesterday's edition of the 'Post,' which boasted the salacious front-page headline: "Crazy Stox Like a Hooker's Drawers ... Up, Down, Up."

"This, folks, this is analysis that everyone can understand," Colbert insisted. "You get a hooker; everyone's excited that her panties are up, then the underwear starts to drop ... people start getting upset, grown men are crying, clutching their heads, worried for their futures and their children's, then the hooker pulls her underwear up -- happy days are here again, somebody rings a bell and everybody goes home!"

Wait, what?