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October 7, 2015

Was Kim Kardashian's Marriage Bad for Business?

by Maggie Furlong, posted Oct 31st 2011 3:30PM
Kim Kardashian and Kris HumphriesIt's over. Finished. No mas.

No, I'm not talking about anything earth-shattering, life-threatening or even all that surprising, but the big news today that Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries have already filed for divorce after only 72 days of marriage is just that: big news.

People can (and will) talk about this for days -- weeks! months even! -- trying to analyze the situation and pinpoint exactly what went wrong, but the truth of the matter is it's probably a lot more cut-and-dry than anyone knows. The marriage was simply bad for business.

From the pressure on Kim to change her last name (the nerve!) to their inability as a couple to secure their own spin-off series on E!, the writing was on the wall. Let's take a look and see why this marriage was doomed from the start to decide who, if anyone, will come out on top.

1. Humphries doesn't quite roll off the tongue like Kardashian
If you watched the four-hour wedding special on E!, you saw Kim pretending to wrestle with the decision to change her last name. Please. This was just another in a long line of signs that she had cold feet, second thoughts and more than a little hesitation. The Kardashian name has become a brand, but that's thanks in large part to Kim, who could've easily built the Humphries brand up together with Kris. It must've been the idea of having to inevitably change it back again that gave Kim such pause.

2. There are no red carpets in Minnesota
No matter how much Kim gushed about following her man wherever the game took him, we all know that she wasn't going to move to "yeehaw" Minnesota. Her income depends on endorsing products, attending Hollywood parties and being in L.A. to shoot 'Keeping Up With the Kardashians' and its many iterations. But Kris, a Minnesota native, likes a simpler lifestyle -- even living in New York with Kourtney, Scott and their baby Mason for the upcoming season of 'Kourtney & Kim Take New York' was too much for him -- and they were sharing a high rise! The life of luxury and excess is what the Kardashians have built a public image around, not a cabin in the mountains. In this clip from the upcoming series (premieres Nov. 27), Kim asks just that: "How am I going to have my career and live in Minnesota?" Kris' response: "Baby, by the time you have kids and they're in school, no one will probably care about you." Ouch.

3. No spin-off = no success
The mark of a successful Kardashian relationship has become having your own spin-off series. 'Khloe & Lamar' got theirs, and Scott and Kourtney sort of did, too ('Kourtney & Khloe Take Miami' dealt largely with their relationship issues before and during Kourtney's pregnancy with Mason). The second that E! said there were no plans for a 'Kim & Kris Do Anything' spin-off -- and we had some interesting ideas -- the marriage was doomed. Why pretend to be happy together if there are no cameras to capture it?

4. Is any press really good press?
As TV viewers, gossip rag readers and general pop-culture pros know, any press is good press -- usually. In this case, fans saw waving red flags that this relationship wasn't built on much more than sexual attraction and a willingness to appear on reality TV together. Take, for example, Kim crying to stepdad Bruce Jenner just days before the wedding; Kris was only allowed to come in to talk to her after the make-up team had touched her up again. He said something about hoping that one day she could show her emotions to him. Ding, ding, ding, ding! Get out now! The fact that Kim and Kris went through with their nuptials despite the red flags and warnings from family members -- and said nuptials were so totally over the top -- makes even the most loyal Kardashian lover skeptical about what else the family's been faking for the cameras.

5. Back to square one
This was even a bad business decision for Kris Humphries, who, before his Kardashian-ization, was a relative unknown in celebrity culture. Whereas L.A. Lakers player Lamar Odom's whirlwind romance and marriage to Khloe paid off (endorsement deals, more playing time, the aforementioned spin-off), this wham-bam-thankyouma'am Kris and Kim courtship kourtship would've worked in his favor had they not made it official, then unofficial again, so quickly. Look at Kim's football playing exes Reggie Bush and Miles Austin -- dating Kim did them well. But proposing, walking down the aisle and duping fans into thinking their love was legit leaves a bad taste in our mouths for both of them.

So it looks like no one really wins here, huh? Especially not E! viewers who wasted four hours of their lives watching a sham of a wedding special when they could've been doing any of this awesome stuff instead. Disagree? Tell us who you think comes out on top here.

What do you think: Was this short-lived marriage bad for business for both Kim and Kris?

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she is a skank and her mom a pimp... They used a young man and they are useless...

November 03 2011 at 8:35 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

This scam of a wedding is a disgrace to E television and the Kardashian family. First the mom kris is like a female pimp. She uses her girls like hookers and now wants to use the younger ones. Bruce better wake up and stop being a weak man. We all know they made money from People magazine and other people as well. Kim should be ashamed of herself. Most of all, we should be ashamed for following a woman whose claim to fame was a sex tape, we all know she and Ray J leaked. To take something as sacred as marriage and defame it like this is really disgusting. They use babies conceived outside of marriage, shacking, and so many other things to make a tv show. People better watch what their little girls are watching and Kim Kardashian is not one of the things they should be viewing. Will people get their gifts back? Will she give the ring back? They cannot give back the four hours some people lost watching this fiasco. I am truly disappointed in E television and the entire Kardashian "stable" I say better off Mr. Humphreys. I feel he was used. All of this crap about using her deceased father's shirt as a part of her wedding gown. That alone was the kicker for me. I mean really, to use your father's name and know this was a scam. The mother does not surprise me at all. I guess when she has used her girls up, she will start on Rob. Whenever she figures out how to pimp him, I know that she will, Well they do not have to worry about me. This is the straw that broke the camel's back.

November 02 2011 at 1:20 PM Report abuse +1 rate up rate down Reply

Everyone seems to forget that they they actually doubled their money during this sham wedding. I believe it was just an investment and a complete mockery. Hopefully, this family can redeem themselves by donating the entire profit to some worthwhile charity.

November 02 2011 at 2:13 AM Report abuse +1 rate up rate down Reply

PS To my last post....How does Bruce put up with these antics? If I were he, I'd cut up Kris' credit and atm cards,take control of the finances for Kim,Kris,Kendall and Kylie, and turn the older 4 and Kris over my knee.

November 02 2011 at 1:28 AM Report abuse +1 rate up rate down Reply

Why a divorce instead of an annulment? My opinion it was all a publicity stunt planned by mama Kris to deflect Kim's promiscuous behavior.

November 02 2011 at 1:24 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

I am willing to accept all the apologies from those individuals who yelled and screamed at me when I said during the televised pictures of the glitz Kardashian/Humphries wedding, "When will they divorce?" I never dreamed the marriage would last a mere 72 days. Although I am not a psychic, something seemed wrong, phoney; there was nothing about their future together, commitment or love;it was all about money, planning this great epic wedding, and rehearsals like it was for a movie or a Broadway play. There was no substance, just a facade.I guess Kris Humphries just didn't fit the leading man's role. So naive. Sport stars Tom Brady, Peyton Manning, Jay Cutler, or Tony Roma were obviously not available.

November 01 2011 at 10:45 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Hi Margie

Well she got 2 big things out of this. Look at the size of her hips and butt. Whoaaaaaaaaa to much food tasting. But her big ugly mouth is good for something.

November 01 2011 at 10:34 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

Oh to be so in LOVE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! A whole 27 days. Maybe it was really true love.

November 01 2011 at 6:16 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

It was all fake come on, we were all waiting for the news to break of the divorce. It was all for money, the camera's, for Kris and Kim to get free crap. All FAKE, ALL of it ALL of them!!!!!

November 01 2011 at 5:51 PM Report abuse +1 rate up rate down Reply
H Estela

who cares for the kardasians???? they are nothing but fakes... they don't entertain me at alllll.....all they like is their faces in front of the cameras.. their make up makes them look pretty but in reality...i really give a damn....

November 01 2011 at 5:15 PM Report abuse +2 rate up rate down Reply

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