'Gossip Girl' Season 5, Episode 7 Recap: Top 5 OMG Moments (VIDEO)

['Gossip Girl' - 'The Big Sleep No More']

Ah, a masquerade, a staple of CW storytelling and a delicious excuse for all manner of identity-switching shenanigans; it was only a matter of time before 'Gossip Girl' exhumed their stock of fancy facewear and started a new scandal or two.

The episode had more than a passing resemblance to last season's masked ball outing, 'The Witches of Bushwick,' another installment in which Serena and her fabulous blonde locks were the subjects of identity theft. (At least this week's episode didn't see her roofied and unconscious in a grimy motel in Queens.)

Diana proved herself to be a master manipulator capable of rivaling even Blair Waldorf, while our stubborn Queen B. found herself too fixated on Chuck's nonexistent scheme to recognize her own feelings.

Join us after the jump for our five favorite moments from episode seven.

1. Blair and Chuck's Dangerous Liaison
Methinks the lady doth protest too much; instead of taking Chuck's newfound conscience at face value this week, Blair was instead determined to prove that our favorite Basshole was trying to somehow wheedle his way back into her good graces -- even when he was nowhere near her. Though I can't deny that Chuck's track record for turning over a new leaf has been patchy at best, Blair's suspicions are clearly less about Chuck's actual motivations and more about her own conflicted feelings. A loving and committed royal-to-be would certainly have no need to stalk her ex around town, trying to catch him in a compromising position, let alone goad him into a passionate kiss.

Blair may have been trying to prove Chuck's weakness this week, but in actuality, she only exposed her own. Lucky for her, Chuck's fresh sense of chivalry prevented him from pointing out that Blair was the one pursuing him, allowing her the hollow victory of forcing him to acknowledge his feelings for her -- feelings she was already well aware of anyway. As Gossip Girl pointed out at the episode's end, Chuck is clearly still wearing the mask that Blair needs him to wear (that of the villain), but I'm disappointed in her behavior this week. As Chuck is making great strides forward in changing his manipulative attitude, Blair seems to be regressing back to her season one self, cruelly toying with his emotions to justify her own -- even as she denies them. She needs to decide what she wants, and not just go running to Chuck because she and Louis are having problems. I must admit, I'm enjoying the way that Chuck is finally evolving this season -- it's long overdue and proving to be one of the most compelling aspects of the narrative.

2. Chivy's Double Indemnity
Poor Chivy has herself so tangled up in lies, I'm surprised she even remembers what her real name is. As if matters weren't complicated enough between her and Nate, her trouble was only compounded when ex-boyfriend Max coincidentally arrived in town and inevitably hit it off with Serena. Sure, locking lips with Nate isn't a particularly disagreeable way to spend an afternoon, but since it inadvertently cost her the job at the Spectator, her semi-boyfriend and her ex-boyfriend in one fell swoop, it perhaps wasn't the best way to go incognito. I'm often torn between finding the character sympathetic and finding her a total snooze, but I think this week she fell into the latter category -- I was glad to see Max shoot her down, given the abrupt way she abandoned him in favor of following Serena back to New York. It's only a matter of time before her secret truly comes out now that Max knows the truth, and I'm eagerly anticipating the fireworks.

3. Serena Becomes a Pawn
Poor, sweet Serena -- even when she thinks she's being proactive and taking charge of her life, she's actually being pushed around Diana's board like a trusting pawn. It's obvious that Diana's playing the long game, going a very circuitous route through Nate and Charlie to garner Serena's sympathies (and removing a few more pieces from the game while she's at it), but now our blonde bombshell is ideally placed to go head to head with Gossip Girl, which was our media mogul's evil plan all along. Is Serena really thick-skinned enough to take on her loose-lipped virtual nemesis? Only time will tell.



4. So Does Nate
Pretty/dumb Nate is apparently smart enough to realize that he's being played, but not quite smart enough to recognize that the player is still playing him for a fool; instead of figuring out that Diana is the puppetmaster behind almost every twist and turn at 'Sleep No More' (and how awesome does that look, BTW?) he blamed Chivy for being the manipulative one ... It's a good thing you're so attractive, Archibald. But it seems that even Diana has someone pulling her strings; Nate's nefarious grandfather William made a classy, limo-bound appearance, thanking Diana for rehabbing Nate's flighty image. But why would Grandpa van der Bilt care what Serena's up to? We can't imagine he gets too much attention from Gossip Girl, but there's obviously more to him than meets the eye.

5. Dan's Literary Pity Party
If we thought Dan's novel would give him more depth, we were sadly mistaken -- it seems that Lonely Boy is more lonely now than ever, and even more self-absorbed. Instead of embracing the amazing opportunity he's been given in having his book published and hitting the Times bestseller list at all, he's seemingly more interested in wallowing in his "failure" and shirking his responsibilities on his book tour. For someone who has often chided Serena for her unreliability, he's certainly taken a few pages from her old playbook, of late. Still, at least his pouting gave Rufus something to do and an excuse to get out of his apartment (and back to the other, I guess, but beggars can't be choosers). Papa H. had some wisdom to impart, but I think a smack around the ear would've worked much better for Dan -- right now, he's more of a downer than Little J was. Here's hoping that wake up call can inject a little charisma back into the character, because this week his scenes were a total buzzkill.


'Gossip Girl' airs Mondays at 8PM ET on The CW.

Why do you think Diana's working with William? Can Serena truly take down Gossip Girl? What did you think of that Chuck/Blair kiss? Share your reactions below!

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