I think that anyone caught drunk driving should lose their license forever. In every state. Not sure if my law is doable or not, but I'm sticking with it.

MADD has a series of new Canadian commercials, and each one takes the form of a cheap, local talk show called Stayin' on the Road, where guests come on and give tips on how you can drink and drive and not get caught. Readers, please don't put dirty pennies in your mouth.

The first time I saw this ad it didn't really register with me. But then I saw it a few more times and realized how bizarre it is. First, the woman seems way too enthusiastic about saying "diarrhea, constipation, gas, bloating, that's me!" I'm all for loving your job, but really. Second, she has a Phillips Colon Health bag she travels with, and the boxes are ready to go if a stranger wants them? And what's with all the signs for behind her? Is this Phillips Colon Health National Airport?

I'm sure this woman is never going to live down the phrase "You're the colon lady!"

It seems that Charlie Sheen and Hanes didn't make for a great fit after all.

The undershirt and underwear company has officially dropped the Two and a Half Men star from their commercials thanks to Sheen's latest pile of dirty laundry.

A spokesmen for the company gave reporters the straight dope by saying "It's a pretty standard, straightforward call when somebody who's in your commercials is arrested on suspicion of something of this magnitude."

Nobody can accuse Jason Alexander of not being honest about himself. The actor has not been happy with the way he's been looking of late and he's going to do something about it. Jason Alexander is the new spokesman for Jenny Craig. Not only is it "no soup for you," Jason, it's also no more big salad, too. (Unless the size of Jenny Craig meals have been supersized and nobody told me about it!)

Jason is the latest Jenny Craig celebrity pitcher, joining Sara Rue and Valerie Bertinelli. I can't wait to see Jason in a Speedo like Valerie in the bikini! No, seriously, Jason's goal with the diet is clearly all about shrinkage. He wants his old waistline, the one that made George Costanza such a catch.

You know what's weird about Barbasol shaving cream? Their cans come without a cap. That has always struck me as odd, as if they got lost in shipping and the store decided to put them on the shelves anyway.

That has nothing to do with this new commercial though. I don't know how effective it is. I thought it was a beer commercial at first, or possibly a truck ad.

[via Adfreak]

I have to hand it to Geico. I remember when I first starting see their TV commercials years ago, wondering who this little company was that was making these odd, probably ineffective ads. But now the company is not only making great commercials, they're iconic. How many companies have more than one memorable spokesperson/mascot that star in their ads like Geico does with the cavemen, the lizard, and the money pile?

The latest features Elmer Fudd. Kudos on being able to use Looney Tunes characters, Geico!

I really want to make fun of this exercise machine ad. I honestly do. But when the ad in question features attractive women working on their "bust line" by stroking a retractable exercise bar, well you do the math Dr. Freud.

Wait, I think I feel a joke coming in. Yes...oh wait, that's not a joke.

The fun pop culture blog (and soon to be book) Gen X-tinct posted this video of old commercials and it brings back a ton of memories.

I had some of those Best of the West figures (no idea why they were so...big). I remember the Chuckle Bug ad but never owned one (that's a weird name for a Big Wheel-like product, and those kids would be wearing helmets today). Chocolate Zestabs? Sounds like some pills they made chocolate so kids would eat them. Oh, wait, that's exactly what they are. (Side note: there's no way that guy invented chocolate chip cookies.)

So playing around with fireworks can be dangerous, and this Dutch ad shows that not only might you get severely injured, it might be in a way you never even imagined.

Having a face like that would cause so many problems I can't even begin to list them all.

[via Adfreak]

If there was an ad that just shook you down to your core and prevented you from looking at the world with the same eyes, please read a book or get out and get some help or something.

Chances are it also appeared on this list from AdWeek of the 30 Freakiest Ads of the Decade. It includes such spinetinglers as the Palm-Pre Girl and Bob's favorite ad, the singing pepperonis for Tabasco.



[via Neatorama]

I have a deep, dark secret: I love infomercials. I can watch that Magic Bullet commercial with the British guy and his wife making food for all of their friends over and over again, even at one in the morning. So I enjoyed this list from Best Week Ever, the 13 most "stupidly convincing" informercials of 2009.

We've talked about several of these already, including the Comfort Wipe, Aspray, and the Shake Weight. But I hadn't seen the giant cupcake one before!

This new Target Christmas commercial makes me uncomfortable. The people playing the parents are great, but there's something about the mom's smile that makes me think this Christmas Day isn't going to go well at all.

One thing that doesn't quite make sense: this television is kinda big. Why does the husband seem shocked by what it is? Didn't he see the package under the tree beforehand? And if the wife hid it from him until the last minute, she must think she did something wrong too.

I'm not quite sure how old this commercial is (I know it's been running for at least a few years now), but it's becoming a new Christmas classic. I like green bean casserole, but this ad has always freaked me out a little. A tree that's not only alive but has a taste for green bean casserole (and can open a window)? It's like a Christmas movie made by the people who did The Day of the Triffids.

Some commercials are just suggestive when it comes to sex and others are just up front and blunt about it. Like this Yaris ad from Australia. I had to watch it twice to hear what the guy says at the very end.

Oh, the commercial has been pulled because of protests but lives on via YouTube!

[via Adfreak]

In our latest TV Squad Podcast, guest Rich Sommer (Mad Men) told us about a commercial he did several years back, and you might remember it too. It's one of those famous ads that, when you watch it again you'll say, "oh, that was him?!" It was a commercial for Cingular phones.