As you'd expect, she succeeded (let's just say she wasn't the most generous tipper), but that wasn't the most interesting part of the program. What was most interesting was the disturbingly orgasmic reactions RR had to the food she was eating at each restaurant. The reaction was exactly the same, no matter what she was eating: eyes closed, she'd moan "Mmmmmmm" for the exact same length of time, open and roll her eyes back into her head, then smile. Cute the first time, it felt pretty creepy after the first dozen or so episodes.
Now that Bourdain's got a few seasons at the Travel Channel under his belt, it's no surprise that he should feel compelled to hold forth on the relative merits of food on television.
It's no secret that the hyperactive Rachael Ray has her hands in a little bit of everything. She has a number of hit shows on the Food Network, a daily talk show, numerous cookbooks, her own magazine, and a upcoming CD of holiday music (not sung by her, just chosen by her). Now, she is taking her on her biggest challenge: outer space.
No, she's not launching her own line of spaceships (although, powered by her own energy, those craft could probably get to Mars in two weeks). What she is doing is having her meals taste tested on the next space shuttle mission, which will hopefully be launching this evening if everything goes as planned. Yessir, the crew of the Discovery will be testing out three of Rachael's signature dishes. And there's a pretty good guarantee that one of them (or all of them) will contain some EVOO as an ingredient (that's Extra Virgin Olive Oil to the rest of you).
Rachael Ray is not the first TV chef to have her meals adapted for space flight. Emeril Lagasse has had a number of items on the menus of both the space shuttle and the International Space Station. In fact, according to Dr. Michele Perchonok, manager of NASA's Space Foods System Laboratory, Emeril's spicy green beans and rice pudding adapted quite well to zero gravity conditions. I wonder if one of Rachael's stoups (not quite stew, and not quite soup) will fare as well.
To understand how Alton makes his turkey, your last chance to watch his special, Romancing the Bird, on Food Network is on November 23rd at 11 am. If you can't wait that long, the full transcript of the show is here. There's also an Alton Brown Fried Turkey recipe on YouTube.
Rather than have to handicap Ray's game, the Chairman will be pairing up both ladies with one of the Iron Chefs. De Laurentiis with Bobby Flay. Ray with Mario Batali.
Alright, the Chairman is actually doing all the fancy pairing because the Food Network told him to, but Ray would get trounced otherwise. Nothing against Miss 30-Minute Meals, but De Laurentiis has some serious skills care of Paris' Le Cordon Bleu and Wolfgang Puck.
Here's hoping the secret ingredient is the tears of failed homemakers.
Boo! Did I scare you? Well, if I didn't that's okay. I'm not much into scaring people since I gave Uncle Barry that heart attack at last year's Halloween party by putting a bloody finger into his apple-tini. Eh, Barry deserved it; he was always a putz. And constantly asking for money. I mean, one time . . .
Sorry, wandered off for a bit there. What was I talking about? Oh, yes, scaring people. There's really no need for me to scare anyone this upcoming Halloween since my good old friend television can do it much better. In fact, now that there are so many channels to choose from, you can watch hours of blood and gore and ooze into the wee hours of the morning while noshing on all of the 'good' candy that your children bring back (this would be anything from the Hershey or M&M/Mars family of candies).
So, to make your life a bit easier while you come down from that sugar buzz, we here at TV Squad have provided you with a comprehensive list of Halloween-themed programming that will be airing on from about dinnertime on October 31st into the first of November. It's all there, from the Halloween and Friday the 13th films (and their numerous sequels) to Halloween-themed Roseanne episodes, to classic Vincent Price movies such as House of Wax. We even mention Dark Town, which airs at 3:15 am on Wednesday, November 1st. In Dark Town a lesbian and a gangbanger team up to battle vampires. Gosh, what will the entertainment industry think of next?
The complete (or as near as complete list) can be seen right after the scary jump. Ooh!
Yes and no, Steve. There are, but I found surprisingly few.
The Five: Favorite Food Network shows
Rachel Ray sweeps the nation
Yeah, I'm confused by that headline too.
Since there are so many changes at Food Network (Rachael Ray devoting more time to her syndicated show, Molto Mario being canceled, the ratings dropping for many of their top shows), the channel is trying to attract younger viewers and challenge competitors by introducing Paula's Party, which Post-Gazette.com describes as "more Romper Room than Cooking With Master Chefs."
Sorry, but that sounds ridiculous to me. Deen is a kind, 59 year-old Southern woman. I don't want to see her talking about sexy footwear (as she did during an episode taping), officiating crab races (as she did during an episode taping), or interviewing rapping skateboarders who wear iPods (OK, that hasn't happened yet, but give the show time).
Then again, the article above says that Deen smokes cigarettes and named her crab "Cocaine Connie," so this could get interesting. Like some wild, nutty grandma who also knows how to cook. But I'm not convinced this will work.
If they're not careful, Food Network will turn into the MTV of cooking channels: a cooking channel that actually has very little cooking on it.
[via TV Tattle]
This is pretty funny. Pictures of various males and females in the middle of what looks like ecstasy. But you have to figure out whether it's ecstasy from being in a porn film or if it's a Food Network star who has made some meal that is especially delicious. (Might be slightly NSFW.)
I scored really well, actually. I only missed one. Damn you, Ham on the Street!
[via Boing Boing]
Info about the accident here in a piece Brown wrote for the New York Times, and there's a pic at Brown's web site.
But he doesn't eat any of it. Why? Because Al's had a stomach the size of an egg since he had a gastric bypass operation in 2002; if he did partake in more than a few bites of any of the high-fat meals he cooked on the show, he'd likely get violently ill.
So why does Al continue to do specials like this? I mean, I'm not a skinny guy myself; just the sight of all that yummy greasy food was sending me to the refigerator (don't worry, I got an apple... honest). I can't imagine the willpower he had to exert being around all that stuff in person. Maybe it's the "if I eat this I get sick" incentive, but I can't be sure. One thing I do know, however; if I were Al, I'd stay away from the food and do specials about weather or something.
That's the name of his new, limited run show on Food Network, Feasting On Asphalt. Brown will jump on his motorcycle and check out places to eat in America.
The show will run for four episodes, and will start on July 29 at 9pm.
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