The sketch I've placed below is from The Mike Douglas Show and features Douglas, Soupy Sales and Moe Howard. The sketch is amusing, though not laugh-out-loud funny, but you may like it more than I did. Really, my main reason for posting it is that I'm a Three Stooges fan and I've never seen any of the Stooges outside of their old movie shorts. Seeing Moe in thick glasses and gray hair is both kind of cool and kind of weird. It's "cweridool," if you will. Will you? Thank you.
In the sketch, which according to Mark Evanier is based on an old Stooges bit, Moe serves as a translator for the "Maharjah." Hilarity ensues.
Speaking of The Three Stooges, Spike TV airs episodes in the wee hours of the morning. They're always worth an occasional Tivoing if I do say so myself. I especially like the one where Moe gets upset and hits Larry and Curly.
The new show will find two teams of contestants investigating a replica of an actual crime scene under the watchful eye of Detective Tommy Le Noir, a 20 year veteran of law enforcement. The teams have 48 hours to complete their investigation before making their final presentation to Le Noir. The team that makes the best case will have a donation made in their names to charity.
The idea makes sense for Spike, given that they already run CSI and CSI: NY. Scheduling Murder in alongside those is a good fit. On the other hand, I can't help thinking that this show was already done with Murder In Small Town X. And just going on what we have here, it sounds like it was done better then.
Original Air Date: November 23, 1987
Teleplay By: C.J. Holland and Gene Roddenberry
Story By: C.J. Holland
Directed by: Cliff Bole
Synopsis: The Enterprise receives a distress call from a colony on Quadra Sigma III, which is just a few planets before eMac Sigma III. There's been an accident, and they need urgent medical attention. The colonists are in luck (as are Trekkies who have had their fill of "Pain! So much pain!") because the Enterprise has just dropped off Counselor Troi at Starbase G-6, putting them close enough to Sigma III to speed on over and save the 500 or so trapped miners. (Ah, trapped miners on a far off colony . . . it's one of the classic Sci-Fi cliches.)
The Enterprise kicks it up to Warp 9.1, but quickly runs into a familiar and no-longer-mysterious giant CGI net that the ship can't pass. Faster than you can say, "Hey, that's the ILM-designed thing Q used in 'Encounter at Farpoint!'" Data says, "Captain! It's that ILM-designed thing Q used in 'Encounter at Farpoint!'" They put on the brakes, and in a blinding flash of light, Q appears on the Bridge, and tells Picard that he's decided that humans are not just a bunch of shitcocks, and as a reward, he's giving them a really swell gift.
Picard tells Q that it's very sweet of him to offer, but they're on their way to save those trapped miners on Quadra Sigma III, where there are also radioactive mutants, a sentient brain in a jar, a computer that's become self-aware and turned on its creator, beings of pure energy, and a call that's coming from inside the house, so maybe they could just talk about this some other time.
Original Air Date: November 16, 1987
Teleplay By: Herbert J. Wright
Story By: Larry Forrester
Directed by: Rob Bowman
Synopsis: On an order from Starfleet (official directive #9: Justify the Plot of the Show), the Enterprise has rendezvoused with a Ferengi ship in the Xendi Sabu system, famous across the entire galaxy for its delicious paper-thin slices of Targ, cooked at your table in boiling water and served with tasty noodles.
However, it's been three days since the Enterprise arrived, and the only message they've picked up from the Ferengi ship is, "Stand by, Enterprise." That's an awfully long time to be listening to music on hold, but Picard knows that his starship will be hailed in the order it arrived, and jumping to warp speed and coming back will only lead to further delays, so he waits.
This is where we come in, and we discover Picard in his quarters with Dr. Crusher. He is extra cranky and has a mysterious headache. It's so mysterious that even Dr. Crusher doesn't know why he has it, and she wants to give Picard a special examination. However, before the porn music can begin, Riker calls Picard to the Bridge; the Ferengi are ready to talk.
Picard arrives on the Bridge and talks with the Ferengi DaiMon Bok, who seems to know Picard. Picard doesn't remember him but wants to know why he requested a meeting and kept the Enterprise waiting for three days, and why in the world they chose Chicago X as their hold music, because "If you Leave Me Now" is cool once, but every 38 minutes for three days is a little much.
This summer, Donnie Wahlberg and John Leguizamo will star in an eight-episode series for Spike called The Kill Pit. The series will focus on a group of Iraq war veterans who attempt to rob a bank and end up in the middle of a stand-off. Leguizamo will play the mastermind behind the robbery, and Wahlberg will play the negotiator who attempts to bring the hostage situation to a peaceful end.
This sounds like an idea that's been done before, but I do like the idea of creating a series that's meant to only last a certain amount of time. This gives viewers the benefit of knowing there's a impending climax as opposed to a show like Lost that will just keep going and risk losing viewers as more and more people give up hope of anything ever being resolved.
The Kill Pit was written by James DeMonaco. Steve Shill will direct the first four one-hour episodes of the series.
(S01E01) Afro Samurai is Samuel L. Jackson's latest venture. It's a captivating mini series that's something of an americanized cross between Tarantino violence and high quality anime. Aside from providing his voice for two characters, he's also co/executive producing it.
"Revenge" begins in the past with the death of the boys father at the hands of Justice, a cackling creepy character, over posession of the #1 headband. I had to watch the fight a couple of times, but I still don't know just how Justice defeated #1. (A weaponized eyeball maybe?)
Original Air Date: September 28, 1987
Written By: D.C. Fontana and Gene Roddenberry
Directed by: Corey Allen
Synopsis: When we last left our heroes, the Enterprise had just entered orbit around planet Deneb IV, so that's a pretty good place to pick up the action, as an Excelsior class ship (in this case the USS Hood) pulls away from the Enterprise, giving us a sense of just how goddamn big this spaceship is. It's a cool shot -- so cool, in fact, we reused it about 900 times over the duration of the series, with different planets (or no planet at all) put into the background.
Picard walks onto the bridge, and before he can find out the Hood's reply to his taunt bon voyage, mon ami (which loosely translates into "suck my balls, assmaster" in 24th century starship captain slang), Q appears on the main viewscreen. Worf leaps to his feet, propelled by his Klingon instincts, and draws his phaser. Luckily, before he can fire, Picard (and the entire audience) point out that all he's going to do there is blast a hole in the main viewscreen. (It is at this very moment that the Big Dumb Stupid Old Worf drinking game is born, one of the only Star Trek drinking games to span two series and at least four movies.) Q gives Picard 24 hours to have his Encounter at Farpoint, or be summarily judged by Captain Q's Kangaroo Court, where he faces death beneath an avalanche of ping pong balls.
Eleven of the 24 hours pass, and we find Riker and Picard getting ready to head down to the planet to meet Groppler Zorn, and have some of those tasty-but-mysterious apples Riker keeps ranting about. Picard then introduces Riker to the ship's counselor. As she walks down toward them, she projects some of her thoughts into Riker's mind, and calls him "Imzadi," which is Betazoid for "Backstory red herring that never really goes anywhere for seven years but finally pays off (sort of) in the last movie when Riker gets Worf's sloppy seconds, but let's not go there because 'ew gross.'"
They all head into the turbolift, and Picard says, "Hey, I think it's great that you guys know each other, because it's important for my key officers to know each other's abilities." Troi says, "We do, sir," and Riker and Picard subtly high-five each other as the turbolift doors close.
Both Comedy Central and Spike TV are launching new Web series this year. Comedy Central plans to launch eleven new series for its Motherload site, including a show featuring Muslim American comedians called The Watch List, and a spinoff of Drawn Together called Judge Fudge.
Spike TV has eight new Web series slated for 2007, including Spike's Hottest Bartenders, Miss March Madness and FMX Prague.
There will also be a South Park wireless application launched in association with South Park Studios that will feature an avatar maker, clips from every season, Q&As with Matt Stone and Trey Parker, messageboards, production blogs, and artwork. Strangely enough, that's pretty much exactly what you can find on the South Park Studios Web site for free. Maybe this wireless app will have things you can't find on the site, but it sounds like they're simply offering what's on the site through a new platform.
If you missed the premiere of the new Spike cartoon Afro Samurai, you can watch the full episode on Spike's Web site. Samuel L. Jackson voices the lead character and also executive produces the program, which is geared towards mature audiences. Ron Pearlman voices Justice, the evil villain who killed the samurai's father. Kelly Hu plays Okiku, a friend from the samurai's past. Jackson also voices the comic relief character, Ninja Ninja. Music for the series was composed by The RZA.
The new series is based on a graphic novel by Takashi Okazaki, who has also worked on the manga series Evangelion, among many other projects, including the artwork for the Spider-Man 2 DVD.
Original Air Date: September 28, 1987
Written By: D.C. Fontana and Gene Roddenberry
Directed by: Corey Allen
Synopsis: The Enterprise, which is huge and beautiful and majestic, cruises through space toward the camera, and Trekkies who have waited since the 60s to have new Star Trek on television let out a mighty cheer. The camera zooms in on a darkened window, where her captain -- the second bald man to command a starship called Enterprise -- steps out of the shadows and gazes at the stars. In voice over, the captain, Picard, says that they're heading out to "the unexplored mass of the galaxy."
Picard heads out on a tour of this spiffy new Galaxy Class starship, through engineering and up on the bridge, while he tells his log (and the now tearfully celebrating Trekkies) that the ship is huge, isn't entirely filled with crew just yet, and is on its way to Farpoint Station, where they'll pick up their new first officer and absolutely nothing else of interest will happen.
Wait. Of course something interesting will happen! They're supposed to solve the mystery of Farpoint, but before the ship can even reach its mysterious destination, a more pressing mystery presents itself: the mystery of the giant mysterious CGI net that the ship can't pass . . . mysteriously.
The Henry Rollins Show
Ex-Black Flag frontman Henry Rollins will be back for a second season on IFC. Premiering on April 13th, the late-night talk show is adding an editorial element with guest-star commentator Janeane Garofalo making the occasional appearance. Twenty episodes have been ordered up.
Boo! Did I scare you? Well, if I didn't that's okay. I'm not much into scaring people since I gave Uncle Barry that heart attack at last year's Halloween party by putting a bloody finger into his apple-tini. Eh, Barry deserved it; he was always a putz. And constantly asking for money. I mean, one time . . .
Sorry, wandered off for a bit there. What was I talking about? Oh, yes, scaring people. There's really no need for me to scare anyone this upcoming Halloween since my good old friend television can do it much better. In fact, now that there are so many channels to choose from, you can watch hours of blood and gore and ooze into the wee hours of the morning while noshing on all of the 'good' candy that your children bring back (this would be anything from the Hershey or M&M/Mars family of candies).
So, to make your life a bit easier while you come down from that sugar buzz, we here at TV Squad have provided you with a comprehensive list of Halloween-themed programming that will be airing on from about dinnertime on October 31st into the first of November. It's all there, from the Halloween and Friday the 13th films (and their numerous sequels) to Halloween-themed Roseanne episodes, to classic Vincent Price movies such as House of Wax. We even mention Dark Town, which airs at 3:15 am on Wednesday, November 1st. In Dark Town a lesbian and a gangbanger team up to battle vampires. Gosh, what will the entertainment industry think of next?
The complete (or as near as complete list) can be seen right after the scary jump. Ooh!
This January, Spike TV will be airing Wild World of Spike, a kind of alternative sports comedy show that doesn't sound too far removed from the network's other wacky sports challenge series, MXC. Wild World of Spike will feature three hosts, Kit Cope, Sam Ellis and Sam Tripoli, who watch bizarre "sports" from around the world such as "mop jousting" and "dirt skiing," and then try to recreate the events themselves. The result, they hope, will be funny for the stoned college kids who will no doubt be the show's core audience. Personally, I'm wondering how long it took them to come up with the concept of watching something on television and then copying it. That's either ingenious or just incredibly lazy, I haven't quite figured out which. The series is being produced by the same folks behind The Princes of Malibu and Growing Up Gotti.
Indeed, Ms. Wagner also let that information slip to our former TVS colleague and current Netscaper Ryan j Budke. Not sure if that was before or after he helped move her furniture.
(Just kidding, Ryan...)
Marcus, by the way, thinks Blade is playing right into his hands, and Shen tries to convince Blade that they have Marcus right where they want him thanks to Krista. Then, from that as a premise, spectacular (well, considering bugetary limitations, anyway) season-finale stuff happens.
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