Even though I rarely watch movies (until they hit On Demand, that is), I love to watch the awards shows. I aspire to be a movie watcher, but I have children, and I'd rather spend my babysitting money drinking wine and talking to adults. Call me crazy. So I read all the reviews, and I pretend like I know so much about the movies. "Memoirs of a Geisha is sure to win Best Costume!" I say, and I'm right. I totally called Best Song for It's Hard to be a Pimp. The only nominated movie I've seen: March of the Penguins. And while I again called the win for Documentary Feature, I never would have expected them to bring out stuffed penguins. I mean, come on! This is a documentary! I didn't get it.

But what everyone surely wants to know: was Jon Stewart funny? Someone wrote about how Stewart was an odd choice, given that he's all about New York, and news, whereas Hollywood is about Los Angeles, and fiction. I didn't see the disconnect - don't most of today's stars have homes both in LA and NYC? - but, still, I was worried. Jon seemed pretty nervous on his Daily Show performances leading up to the Oscars. Jon's the sort of guy who (despite his ever-present sarcasm) wears his heart on his sleeve. He uses the comedic device of truth, and geekiness. And that's what is oddest about having him at the Academy Awards. Self-effacing truthful geekiness is so out of place next to Jessica Alba (who, to follow a tangent Stewart started me upon, I definitely would not pick to repopulate the earth).