Will Rogers once said, "Advertising is the art of convincing people to spend money they don't have for something they don't need."

And how do you that? That's easy. Just sprinkle in some sex! It's nature's negotiator.

Of course, it's not as simple as it sounds. These days, people are easier to offend than Catholic nuns and the FCC has made it nearly impossible to advertise products the way God intended (i.e. naked girls with abnormally large boobs writhing and moaning over the awesomeness of Flonase). So an even subtler art of using sex to get your money lies within this deeply layered process. Here are the best of the best and the worst of the worst.

It could have been worse. It was a 90-minute premiere.

There was a time when I would have watched a show like this, in the 70s or maybe the 80s, when real celebrities would be involved instead of reality show stars. They were fun shows. I watched the first 60 minutes of The Superstars and then sort of snapped out of it, thinking, why am I watching this? Nothing really happened, and I decided I wouldn't care at all if anything did happen. Who cares if Jennifer Capriati loses a bike race?

Wipeout is mindless entertainment. The Superstars is stupid entertainment.

This was a very funny ad, mostly because of the performance of the cashier. "Blazin' Buffalo and Ranch. Giddyup!" The little flirtation between mustache guy, seriously that's some mustache, and the cashier was cute. I liked how she was a little startled by his growl. And the clean up punchline at the end sold it well. Nice job.

I think this will fall short of the massive buzz generated by the Ali Landry "Doritos Girl" commercials, but they gain points for doing something different. A solid entry in the competition.