Caroline

In anticipation of the new season of 'The Real Housewives of New Jersey,' the restaurateurs in the Franklin Lakes vicinity have decided to anchor all dining tables to the floor like McDonald's and Burger King. That way, Teresa can't be doing any table-flipping unless she's wearing a cape with a giant 'S' in red and has an aversion to Kryptonite.

No seriously -- and table-flipping is hardly that -- those Jersey women are coming back. Bravo's 'The Real Housewives of New Jersey' returns Monday, May 3 at 10 PM ET. And unlike some editions of the 'Real Housewives,' all the principals are part of the action.

The Green Wing cast and crew seriously sound like some of the loveliest people alive. Seriously. From all the great fan encounters I've heard, the brilliant interviews I've read and watched, and the fantasies I've had about working with them, they, and their fantasy-selves, just seem like all-around good people. To further my belief, the GW folks have gathered a bunch of amazing stuff and put together some charity eBay auctions. 100% of the proceeds will go to the World Wildlife Foundation and, even better, the shipping is free.

Items include signed DVDs and scripts (with unreleased scenes!) and a costume lot with Martin's spiky raver shirt, Sue White's long-arm blazer, and Mac's coma tee and glorious bottomless scrubs (ass-less scrubs, is what they mean). These aren't the usual crappy auctions from programs that offer "a water bottle used in scene four" kind of stuff... Each piece was part of a fantastic moment in the show. If I didn't have student loans to worry about, I'd snap up all these items. Anyone want to buy me something? My birthday's only eleven months away.