On 'The Colbert Report' (weeknights, 11:30PM ET on Comedy Central) Stephen Colbert passed along a get-well-soon message to an injured staffer in a way that only he could.

"Before we get started, I just want to give a quick shout-out to our writers' assistant C.C. Latearer who is laid up with some injuries," Colbert explained.

"Over the weekend she got a little hurt. So what happened was, she was in a bar in the East Village when Ultimate Fighting Champion Brock Lesnar starting hitting on C.C.'s mom, and C.C. told him to step off -- words were exchanged, punches were thrown."

"Then, C.C. spotted some orphans outside being harassed by a street gang. She stepped in, armed only with a broken bottle and Brock Lesnar's jaw bone, and she took care of bidness."

Eugene Jarecki, who directed the Ronald Reagan biopic 'Reagan' was on 'The Colbert Report' (weekdays, 11:30 ET on Comedy Central) where he tried to impress upon Stephen Colbert that Reagan wasn't the rigid conservative he is often remembered as.

"Reagan was actually the first President to have a gay sleepover in the White House, he had many gay friends," Jarecki told Colbert.

"Go to Hell, what are you talking about," Colbert responded, incredulously. "Name one gay sleepover at the White House!"

"You can Google it," Jarecki recommended. It's fact."

"Who?' Colbert demanded.

"It was his interior decorator and his partner," Jarecki explained, triggering laughter in the audience.

The whole "interior decorator" thing made Jarecki's answer seem more like a punchline than a statement of fact, however Google does confirm that in 1984 Reagan's interior decorator and his partner were the first openly gay couple to spend a night in the White House.

The billions of American taxpayers' dollars that's spent annually on foreign aid can be a sore subject with the general public. However, on 'The Colbert Report' (weekdays, 11:30 ET on Comedy Central), Stephen was able to find a silver lining behind all the money we've sent to Egyptian president Hosni Mubarak's embattled regime.

"Mubarak is our friend. And we know Mubarak is our friend because we pay him to like us. Specifically, we pay him $1.3 billion a year," Colbert explained, as his audience groaned.

"But folks, listen up, that money buys us security," he continued. "We haven't had a single mummy attack on US soil!"

We ran Colbert's claim of no mummy attacks by our crack team of researchers, who were able to confirm that it is 100% accurate.

On the new 'Colbert Report' (weeknights, 11:30PM ET on Comedy Central), the host unleashed his new opening credit sequence, inspired by 'Sarah Palin's Alaska.'

Sure, it's a calculated ploy on his part to shore up his conservative support, win over the Tea Partiers, and gain ground in the "Red States." ... But on the other hand -- fishing! Deer! Mountains! Explosions! Symbolic bald eagles! Machine guns!

And so, as Colbert says, it's time to let this modified intro "off the leash."

Is there anything Stephen Colbert can't do? At the end of Thursday night's 'Colbert Report,' Stephen and Elvis Costello performed a silky-smooth duet of The Everly Brothers' classic 'All I Have To Do is Dream.' Impressive harmonization skills, Stephen.

The National Mall started to fill up around nine o'clock for the Rally to Restore Sanity and/or Fear today, and the signs were plentiful. Everyone has their own angle, getting creative with the satirical vibe of the event. People carried signs featuring many different types of calls for reasonableness: advocates for everything from marijuana to masturbation, and a plea for President Obama to do something about 'Twilight.' Here are twenty of the best we saw.

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Check out the rest of TV Squad's Rally to Restore Sanity Coverage:

Keeping Things Moderately Reasonable on the Ground at the Rally to Restore Sanity (VIDEO)

Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert Reflect on Rally: We Did It! Now What?

The Best Moments From the Rally to Restore Sanity and/or Fear (VIDEO)

Who Attended the Rally to Restore Sanity?

Depending on your political perspective, seeing Stephen Colbert, a faux pundit, testify before Congress is either completely surreal or just about right. But that's where Colbert was today, sitting next to United Farm Workers President Arturo S. Rodriguez and giving his opinion on jobs and migrant farm workers. The story was reported by The Huffington Post, with video of Colbert's testimony (see video below).

Colbert started out in character, saying he hoped his star power would give the issue enough of a boost to make it to C-Span 1. He drew a few smiles but most of the gallery did not seem amused; some appeared bored, others even hostile.

'Colbert Report' host Stephen Colbert is always full of ... blatantly idiotic ideas. And tonight's episode (weeknights, 11:30PM ET on Comedy Central) provided us with more of the same. Stephen took on the seemingly endless 'Ground Zero Mosque' controversy, and came up with a "clever" plan to prevent the mosque/community center from being built.

Here was his plan: Bury one thousand copies of the Koran -- the Muslim holy book -- along with a nuclear weapon. If the ribbon for the mosque is ever cut, then the nuke will detonate, blowing up all the copies of the Koran. According to him, this will stop any would-be mosque-builders in their tracks. It's total deterrence! It's mutually assured destruction!

A few weeks ago, I found myself eating breakfast across from a large jumboscreen playing the all-news all-the-time TV channel. Various tickers took up most of the real estate, and while my breakfast companion (my mother) watched the latest stock numbers go by, I read the main ticker, fascinated that every single story had a celebrity or pop culture angle. The results of studies about Facebook users followed news of Angelina Jolie's latest humanitarian mission, intermingled with Toronto Film Festival updates and reports from the sets of the new fall TV shows.

I realized later on that I was probably watching when an entertainment loop was on, but what surprised me is that I wasn't fazed when I thought that was it -- that the ticker was reporting all the news of the world, and all that news was about celebrities.

Israeli Ambassador Michael Oren appeared on Comedy Central's 'The Colbert Report' (weeknights, 11:30PM ET on COM) Wednesday to discuss the Israeli blockade of Gaza and he faced some tough questions from Stephen Colbert.

The segment concludes with Colbert raising the controversy surrounding Helen Thomas' recent remarks on Israel (in which she said that the Israelis should get the heck out of Palestine and go back where they came from).

Craig Robinson -- brother of Michelle Obama -- appeared on 'The Colbert Report' (weeknights, 11:30 PM on Comedy Central). Upon meeting his guest, Stephen Colbert commented on Robinson's resemblance to his sister. "I've met [Michelle]," Colbert said. "And I have to say that you guys look a lot alike." Colbert then suggested that Robinson should put on a wig to disguise himself as the First Lady.

Watch the video after the jump.

And now, a moment of zen for late-night TV.

According to the New York Times, Comedy Central recently signed its two award-winning "fake news" stars -- Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert -- to deals that would keep them on the air through 2012's presidential election.

"Jon and Stephen have established themselves not only on the cable landscape but also on the cultural landscape," said Doug Herzog, President of MTV Networks, which owns Comedy Central. "I think of myself as the manager of the '61 Yankees. I just wanted to keep writing Mantle and Maris into the lineup as many seasons as I can."

The commentary and analysis of The Olympics is more interesting than the Olympics themselves, like Joel's post about 'Today' and their coverage of the Games and the one about the ratings. Also, this clip from 'The Colbert Report.' Stephen is doing his shows this week from Vancouver, and last night he had his brother (an attorney) on to let him know what he can and cannot say about the Olympics so NBC doesn't get sue him.

[Watch clips and episodes of 'The Colbert Report' and other shows at SlashControl.]

It has often been reported via numerous polls that people in their 20s get most of their news from 'The Daily Show.' I've always been suspicious of this statistic, because you have to know the news to get most of the jokes on Jon Stewart's show, but there's probably at least a little truth to it. Now Bob Schieffer, host of CBS' 'Face the Nation,' is weighing in on the topic of whether you can get your news from that show or 'The Colbert Report.'

In short, Schieffer calls both Stewart and Colbert "editorial page cartoonists," in an interview at Broadcasting & Cable. He doesn't mean it in a derogatory way, he just means that they serve a certain function when it comes to the news. They're not journalists, they're making commentary on the journalist (and politics and current events and pop culture). He thinks "if all you watched is Stewart and Colbert, I'm not sure you could call yourself well-informed."

I would agree with that, and I bet Stewart and Colbert would too.