I had trouble sleeping the other night (there were sugar plums dancing through my head – angry, murderous sugar plums), so I turned to the best TV option I had available to me: TNT HD's replay of A Perfect Day starring Rob Lowe.

Here's the plot: lower middle class guy writes a book that becomes a best seller. As he climbs the economic ladder, he becomes a workaholic and is thus estranged from his family. A mysterious stranger then appears and helps him to realize that true happiness doesn't come from work and success, but rather from spending time with his wife and his improbably named daughter, Carson.

I watched the whole thing for the same reason I play with hangnails and follow Philadelphia sports teams – I secretly hate myself.

(Check out the video after the break in this post...)
Last night, I missed American Idol, because of Lost and also because I don't really watch American Idol much past the initial round of horrible singers trying out. I did, however, record the finale on my DVR, because ... well ... Prince!

Anyway, I decided to FF to the end of the show to see who won, and I was happy it was the gray-haired fellow from Alabama. And then, the strangest thing happened. David Hasslehoff appeared in the audience and he was starting to tear up and clearly shocked that he was tearing up over the ending of American Idol.

I understand, David. Although you are a veritable singing superstar over in Deutschland, you have long dreamed of the day when your own American people would embrace you as their American Idol. You had long given up all hope of that ever happening. Seeing silver-maned Taylor Hicks winning last night, however, reignited that fire of hope in your aging heart.

Ausgezeichnet, my friend! Ausgezeichnet!