Fashion Police

There have been three constants in this late stage of Joan Rivers' career. First, her project will involve her daughter Melissa. Second, she will work for E! Entertainment. Third, it will involve interviews on the red carpet of some awards show. All three of these are true in her new series of Fashion Police specials for E! Although in this case, Melissa Rivers is a producer and won't generally be appearing on screen.

I remember her best as the voice of Dot Matrix in Spaceballs. I did watch her Comedy Central Roast and found it to be lackluster. After all the plastic surgery, I'm surprised she can even move her mouth anymore. It's frozen in a grin like Jack Nicholson's Joker.

I'm fascinated to know why Joan Rivers' red carpet interviews are so popular that E! keeps asking her back. Does anybody out there watch and like the interviews? Isn't it like watching a train wreck?

• At 8, NBC has the Heroes Countdown special at 8, followed by the two-hour Heroes season premiere.
• ABC has the two-hour season premiere of Dancing with the Stars at 8, then the season premiere of Boston Legal.
• FOX has a new Sarah Connor Chronicles at 8, followed by a new Prison Break.
• CBS has the season premiere of Big Bang Theory at 8, then the season premieres of How I Met Your Mother and Two and a Half Men, the series premiere of Worst Week, and the season premiere of CSI: Miami.
• The CW has new episodes of Gossip Girl and One Tree Hill.
• E!'s Fashion Police discuss the Emmy dresses at 8.
• At 8:30, HGTV has a new Curb Appeal.
• Food Network has a new How'd That Get On My Plate at 8:30, then a new Unwrapped.
• At 9, USA has a new Monday Night RAW.
• At 10, TNT has a new Raising The Bar.

American Idol (8PM, Fox)
Just when you think 'American Idol' can't get any bigger, it does. The first season averaged 12.7 million viewers; last season averaged over 30 million. A whopping 36 million watched Taylor Hicks triumph over Katharine McPhee in the finale. Some people are predicting a drop this year, but most of 'em are envious executives at other networks. 'Idol' is a cultural juggernaut. Deal with it.

Check out AOL Television's extensive coverage of 'Idol.'

• At 7, Andre Agassi is in action as USA continues U.S. Open coverage.
• At 8, ABC has a new Big Brother: All-Stars.
• FOX is repeating the two hour premiere of Celebrity Duets at 8, for some reason.
• MTV has the 2006 Video Music Awards at 8.
• FX has The Transporter at 8 (repeated at 10).
• Also at 8: TCM has the classic film noir Double Indemnity.
• At 10, NBC has a new Windfall.
• There's a new American Eats on The History Channel at 10, focusing on "Canned Foods."
• Food Network has a new Throwdown With Bobby Flay at 10, followed by a new Ace of Cakes.
• E's Fashion Police rip apart what the celebs wore at the Emmys. It's on at 10.
• Also at 10: GSN ends their countdown of the 50 Greatest Game Shows of All-Time with shows 2 and 1.

• At 8pm, ABC has the Dancing With The Stars results show, followed by a new In Justice and a new 20/20.
• CBS has repeats of Ghost Whisperer, Close To Home, and Numb3rs.
• NBC has a repeat Most Outrageous Moments at 8, a new one at 8:30, then new eps of Dateline and The Book of Daniel. 
• FOX has a new Bernie Mac at 8, followed by a repeat ep and then a new Trading Spouses: Meet Your New Mommy.
• UPN has a new WWE Friday Night Smackdown! (gotta remember that exclamation point) at 8, while the WB has a repeat What I Like About You, a new Living With Fran, a new Reba, and a new Twins. 
• ABC Family has Ghost, with Demi Moore, Patrick Swayze, and Whoopi Goldberg. It's on at 8 too.
• Can't get enough American Idol? A&E has a Biography of Simon Cowell at 8, followed by the Bond movie Tomorrow Never Dies.
• HGTV has a new Get Color at 8, followed by a new Design Remix and a new Double Take.
• The Sci-Fi Channel has a new Stargate SG-1, a repeat Stargate Atlantis, and then a new Battlestar Galactica.
• Also at 8: Emeril cooks "New Yorker's Favorites" on Food Network.
• At 9, Discovery has a new ep of Egypt Untold.
• 9pm movies: TBS has Erin Brockovich, while Bravo has Chicago and HBO2 has The Day After Tomorrow.
• At 10, ESPN2 has coverage of The Australian Open, and the Travel Channel has a new Weird Travels. 
• Also at 10: a new Monk on USA.
• IFC has a repeat Hopeless Pictures at 10, followed by repeats of Greg The Bunny and Dinner For Five.  
• At 10:30, Noggin has a new South of Nowhere.
• I didn't know that USA was showing repeats of House. There's one tonight at 11.
• If you still haven't had enough of the Golden Globes, you can watch E!'s Fashion Police roundup of the best and worst dressed at midnight. 
• At 1am, Comedy Central has Kevin Smith's Clerks.