It's one of the biggest TV weekends of the year. Outside of the big 'Say Yes to the Dress' finale, no other television events elicits more anticipation and preparation leading up to the actual show.

The hype builds for weeks and weeks. People and analysts alike are forced to stretch what should be a few minutes of discussion and analysis into a two week, soul-crushing marathon of overused cliches -- like "Give 110 percent," "We just need to play our game" and "Hey! Don't touch me there!" -- and washed up "experts" just trying to scrape together enough money to pay the minimum on their baby mama's credit card bill.

Advertisers clamor for this day like little girls (and writers of this article) do for even a glimpse of Justin Bieber's impish smile and signature hair-flip, dropping millions and millions of dollars to attempt to wow America with 30 seconds of cheeky anthropomorphic cartoon animals and a hollow, over-produced, lip-synced, celebrity half-time extravaganza that generally feels like some sort of cruel public mass-torture ploy to punish everyone.

Oh yeah... and there's a football game thrown in there somewhere too, and here are some of my predictions for the big day.