Will Rogers once said, "Advertising is the art of convincing people to spend money they don't have for something they don't need."

And how do you that? That's easy. Just sprinkle in some sex! It's nature's negotiator.

Of course, it's not as simple as it sounds. These days, people are easier to offend than Catholic nuns and the FCC has made it nearly impossible to advertise products the way God intended (i.e. naked girls with abnormally large boobs writhing and moaning over the awesomeness of Flonase). So an even subtler art of using sex to get your money lies within this deeply layered process. Here are the best of the best and the worst of the worst.

Over the holiday weekend, I practiced a little TiVo catharsis (which I know have to rename DVR catharsis since it's not an TiVo product). Yes, I checked out my list of shows piled up on the DVR and started watching some of them. There was one that I have to tell you about because you have a chance to watch it this week.

Showtime ran a five-part documentary series about the history of the American Football League called Full Color Football. On Wednesday, December 30, Showtime is running the episodes as a Full Color marathon starting at 7 p.m.

With all the Michael Jackson news, let's not forget that another huge star, Farrah Fawcett, also passed away yesterday. All of the obits I've seen of Farrah pretty much start her professional biography with her breakout role in Charlie's Angels. But Farrah was almost 30 when she landed the role as Jill Munroe. A quick look at her IMDb profile shows that Farrah had a number of guest-starring roles well before Aaron Spelling made her a megastar.



Farrah also starred in a ton of commercials in the early '70s, including this famous spot with Joe Namath. Here, the Jets QB is advertising Noxema shaving cream, and Farrah lustily covers his face in the stuff.

More ads after the jump.

Let me start this rant by saying that I like sports. No, I love sports. I'm a fan. I get the DirecTV NBA package and the major league baseball games. I can talk to you for hours about stats and players and great games. That said, I hate the way Sunday sports programming drifts over into primetime. This happens primarily on CBS and Fox with the NFL games in the fall and winter, but the other networks have been guilty of staying with the game and then still insisting on showing the primetime schedule after the game is over -- even if that means that an 8 o'clock show begins at 8:45 and your DVR gets all screwed up and you wind up with only 15 minutes of a show you wanted to see!

There is a treat for all fans of The Brady Bunch over at AOL TV. As part of their "Where are they now?" series, AOL TV is providing the current stats on all your favorite BB cast members.

Some of them have been more high profile than others. Christopher Knight (Peter) is, of course, well-known to today's reality show fans. He was a cast member on The Surreal Life where he met and fell in love with America's Next Top Model winner Adrianne Curry. The two of them went on to star on their own reality series My Fair Brady which ended with their wedding.